Kaos In Control

Kaos In Control

by Justin Malangoni


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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781463413156
Publisher: AuthorHouse
Publication date: 06/13/2011
Pages: 104
Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.25(d)

Read an Excerpt


By Justin Malangoni


Copyright © 2011 Justin Malangoni
All right reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-4634-1315-6

Chapter One



    I was almost famous
    I was almost rich
    I was almost loved
    That was only a glitch

    I almost made it
    Till the road ran out of pavement
    Now everything is adjacent
    My life, just complacent
    Ending up again, in the basement

    I almost felt success
    Then landed in another mess
    I almost felt blessed
    I almost had company
    But here I am alone
    I almost had something to say
    But didn't pick up the phone
    I almost had feelings
    But in the past
    They are unknown

        Death Bed

    What really matters?
    Put yourself in the perspective of being on your death bed
    What are your last thoughts?
    All that is material is temporal
    Now whatcha thinkin' about?
    The grass between your feet ... and toes
    The sounds that birds make as the morning grows
    The sunset bliss
    Or your very first kiss
    The sound your lover makes
    And their facial expression as mind and body awakes
    The smells that are sweet and unique
    A hug from your child while feeling their heart beat
    Your pets unconditional love
    The cluster of stars shining like a city from above
    The feeling of ejaculating or alone while masturbating
    I had to throw sex in there, otherwise we would not be here
    The memories of when we were young
    The look in her eyes knowing she is the one
    So holding on to all this material, really amounts to nothing
    Its our life adventures that truly is our something

        Everything Must Change

    Since you're makin' that paper I guess I can't complain
    But the shit that you've been sayin' isn't helpin' the game
    Such is life and everything must change

        Find Myself

    It's all the same
    I find myself all alone in a crowd
    Now my smile turns upside down
    But I don't feel anything
    Have to change
    Time to find my tones of home
    Emotions petrified and turned to stone
    Take my body put it six feet under
    Leave the rest of me to sit here and wonder

    Can't complain
    Who would listen to me anyway
    Come help wash away the pain
    But I don't feel anything
    Blinding me
    Your beauty shoots through my eyes
    Try so hard to compromise
    But you don't feel anything
    Take my body put it six feet under
    Leave the rest of me to sit here and wonder

        If I Knew Something

    I only write what I know about
    Which isn't much
    Grab my crutch and light it up
    Smoke fills my lungs
    Dreams fly through my mind
    Where am I in time is passing
    Time is passing
    So I do nothing
    But my mind still hunting for something
    That special something
    The one thing
    My fantasy
    That sacred beach no one can reach
    Just me and my peach
    Oooh what fun it is to be dumb
    I hate knowing, absolutely hate knowing
    Don't show your colors
    Chameleon, espionage, counter-intelligence
    Who's who, what's what ...
    When it comes to the mighty dollar we are all sluts
    Guess you can call this uncut
    Grind the clutch
    Because we are all fucked

        Just Do

    Phrases to adverbs to pronouns to predicates
    All these lessens in vocabulary don't amount to shit
    I mean it
    Pass the blunt we'll all just repeat it
    I mean it
    It's like I'm chasing my mind round a cul-de-sac
    Twisting in circles got a tornado effect
    Whirling away
    Time is, each day
    So get up and stop wasting
    And don't start hasting
    Because haste makes waste
    So slow up your pace
    Say good morning to the world
    Cuz each day is new
    No better time to just do

        Maybe Some Day

    Gotta shave and get the scruff off of my face
    Get outta this phase of a crazy maze that is my brain
    I don't even wanna think about it, talk about it, so I walk around it
    That's why know one really knows about my shit

    But maybe someday you might hear it

    So here we go with the second verse, let me grab my purse
    And join all you Raging Metrosexuals that are insecure
    I hope you realize that nothing lasts forever
    Especially your looks but your mind won't sever
    I don't even know why I'm talking about this

    Just thought maybe some day might hear it

        My Shit

    People say I'm good like that cuz I'll be makin' their day
    I'll also make an atheist kneel down and pray
    Make a straight man gay
    And a lesbian crave my dick, while I'm lickin' her clit
    Mouth plagued with juices, still I write another hit
    Could care less if you think this is another bullshit lyric
    I'll tie your ass up, blind fold you so you still have to hear it
    Smearing words like baby shit all over your face
    Painting lyrical images cuz Hip/Hop isn't about race
    Have an extra large following and I rule with an iron dick
    Create a force so strong it will reverse the earth's core magnet
    That's right I'm ligit
    More live than realistic
    And even when I'm done singin' ... You'll still be hearin' my shit
    My shit, my shit, my shit ...

        No One Can Hear Me Scream

    Black sheep
    If I had any guts I'd put myself 6 feet deep
    Then maybe I'd get some sleep
    Lying half awake and half baked
    To erase these thoughts I have to concentrate
    Cannot escape my fate
    Bad luck coming at an alarming rate
    Can't find a date let alone find a mate
    Now back to my reality
    Subconscious speaking louder than me
    I cry for help but no one hears me scream
    Wake up sweating from another bad dream

        Nothing But Talent

    I'm quite possibly the biggest fuck up on the planet
    I have nothing to show for it but loads of talent
    I wear my emotions on my sleeve
    But it is in myself I do not believe
    Surrounded by happiness but none for me
    The beautiful people I used to be
    Now I shuffle through life socially inept
    When I take into account, I'm emotionally in debt
    There is no room for me here or there
    There is no room for me anywhere
    I've tucked my ambition back on the shelf
    I'll admire it fondly all by myself

        Perception of
        Ones Reality

    I'm the lust you cannot relieve
    The peace that you will not receive
    The itch you can not scratch
    The love you can never match
    I'm the taste that refuses to leave
    The one of so many pet peeves
    So beautiful you can not see
    So perfect you can not be
    A perception of ones reality

    I'm the good pain and the happy cry
    The mouth that hurts from smiling too wide
    I'm that "break-up" pain that hurts so bad
    The morning traffic that makes you mad
    I'm the glimpse of happiness you receive
    When the pain subsides, I'm the reprieve
    A perception of ones reality

        The Way

    It's getting too hard to see any thing or any where
    It's not all darkness yet, but it sure is getting there
    If everything happens for a reason then where is the logic behind it?
    And if everything is the way it's suppose to be, why can't if find it?


    I try not to let the past control my future
    Everything within is out
    Everything out is within
    All hitting at once separately
    Can't you see all coming after me
    Like a soft concrete or hard cotton
    I am so positive on what I doubt
    So unsure of what I know
    All I am I am not
    All I am not I have become
    A past brought into the future
    But tomorrow will not be my present
    I am everywhere

Chapter Two

Fuck You (Love)

        Back to Zen

    You make everyone feel great, have them thinking wonderful things
    As you did with me
    But no more, your tone doesn't ring
    What you say and what you do never seem to portray the truth
    Masturbating to me,
    Like I'm the ignorant society that can not see
    You broke my trust
    Staining my body and mind like oxidized rust
    I told you redundantly I wanted to leave and let you be
    Even though with honesty your words had no meaning
    How can you go and tell someone you love them
    Then take it right back from them
    I would have given you the world and more
    Now my gate to the minds eye is telling me: Close and lock the door
    And I will sleep once again
    Easing my soul to return to its Zen

        Blood Rush

    Eye to Eye
    My hand your thighs
    Lips press
    Hips crush
    Blood rush from feeling your touch
    Sweat drips
    My teeth
    Your lower lip
    Just flesh
    Bodies mesh
    Your nails
    My back
    We tense ...

        Forever Inside of Me

    You are the only one for me
    From now and forever it will always be
    Like tapping into my chi
    Your energy flows eternally
    And it breaks my heart, oh how I want you to see
    But you do not want me
    And I can not control how you feel
    So I'll shut my brain from what is real
    And cauterize my heart to make a seal
    As time passes on the healing process will begin
    Forever what is inside of me will remain within

        Minus the Heart

    Please keep safe with my heart
    Because without you it's torn apart
    It belongs to only you
    So feel free to use it through and through
    I know I lost you, but I can't stop searching
    For you are the only one who can mend my hurting
    My mind doesn't work well minus the heart
    But then again if I was smart
    I would know this already
    Instead I relinquish a plethora of emotions
    However unsteady
    I'm an embarrassment and a fraud
    A broad flawed piece of work
    I applaud your patients for dealing with this jerk
    Well ... I guess I'm running out of things to say
    Doesn't really matter ...
    A brain minus the heart is useless anyway

        Monogamy Unnaturally

    Bitch just suck, what the fuck.
    Why you gotta fall in love, there is no sole mate given to you from
    There is no monogamy naturally, naughty by nature that's how its
    suppose to be.
    So we can spread our seed
    It keeps balance through mathematics
    That's why divorce rates are so high and marriage is so tragic
    Just another government ploy to keep us static
    Better keep your head before you go out and buy a rock that will put
    you in debt
    But it's a symbol of our love, bitch please, word is my bond should be
    So you dish out another house payment so you can walk down the
    Later to find out that is was your "green mile"
    You can't get out cuz you'll breach contract and realize "shit, now I'm
    in the thick of it"
    You want to leave but she gets half though you've earned all of it
    Then there's an argument, you try and walk away but the law is on her
    So she throws a fit.
    By the way, watch out, cuz here comes the hit
    Now you're outraged and start to shout
    Cuz if it was a guy standing across from you he'd be knocked the fuck
    So now you are fucked, stuck and outta luck, with someone you don't

        Only a Dream

    I wanted to hear her voice
    But she never called
    I wanted to see her face
    But it never showed
    I wanted to say I love you
    But she wouldn't listen
    I wanted her to know there is no other
    But she when missing

    Our eyes finally meet
    Our bodies press
    I feel your flesh
    It seems so real to feel your feel
    Though nothing is ever what it seems
    I wake to realize you are only one of my dreams

        So I Can See

    Keeping all in front of me
    So I can see and move with ease
    Controlling my prey from night to day
    When I come, go and stay
    It is the only way to keep safe inside
    And uphold my pride
    But by staying encased
    I won't be able to embrace
    That floaty feeling from above
    We recognize this as love
    But what I do not feel can not hurt me
    And what I refuse to hold onto will not desert me
    So I'll keep all in front of me
    So I can see and move with ease

        So Perfect

    I am so lucky to have a girl like you
    Make me believe in everything I do
    Girl I would walk to the end of the depths for you
    You are so perfect in every way
    Glass half empty, but you will find a way to make my day
    Not one thing about you that I can complain
    Or want to change
    You are all that is and ever will be to me
    My destiny
    My bible
    My idle
    My best friend
    My first thought everyday from beginning to end
    My heart is not a lend
    It is for you to keep
    I got you every step of the way
    Even if we never make hay
    Cuz I don't care about money
    I care about life and what it brings
    And mine without yours means absolutely nothing


Excerpted from KAOS in CONTROL by Justin Malangoni Copyright © 2011 by Justin Malangoni. Excerpted by permission of AuthorHouse. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Table of Contents


I. Cro Magnon Illustration....................1
1. Life....................3
2. Fuck You (Love)....................17
3. Government Greed....................31
4. Unedited Poems & Lyrics....................49

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kAos in CONTROL 4 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 4 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Duskfire bounds off to the clearing where the creame kit with amber eyes is. She grabs the kit by the scruff and places a spiked chain along her neck. At the end of the chain is an iron ball heavier than a tree. The kit, Dawnkit, yowls for help. "Let me go Duskfire!" she yowls. "Never." says Duskfire. Duskfire's black pelt and amber eyes gleam as much as the moonlight on a bright night. But there is no moonlight tonight. The brightest things are a tree some other cats are burning down and Duskfire's eyes. Her eyes. They were brighter than fire itself. That' why you could always see Duskfire coming, but never escape… Dawnkit toyed around with the mouse in front of her. Well, maybe it wasn't exactly a mouse. I guess you could say it was half a crowfood mouse. Caught 24 moons ago. That was way older than her mother, Ravenwing. That was a little younger than her grandmother, Elmfall, who was 23 and a half moons old. Then Dawnkit froze as Duskfire padded into the clearing. "Why aren't you eating your food little one? It's the only thing we're giving you." Dawnkit shuddered. "D-do mean I have to e-eat maggots? She knew the disgusting bugs were in the 'mouse'. "Well, you don't have to. We'll save that for another victim. "O-okay." Dawnkit mewled quietly. Duskfire's eyes gleamed at her. Dawnkit nearly went blind. Why were they so shiny today? Did she have something in mind for her? =^•-•^= TO BE CONTINUED WHEN SOMEONE SAVES DAWNKIT AND BRINGS HER SOMEWHERE SAFE… Story by Dawnkit Save Dawnkit now if u want to hear the rest of the story. Bring her to a safe place and be sure to include ur description, actions, and name. -Dawnkit
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
About Deathstalker. PLEASE GET HIM OUT OF LEAFCLAN!!!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Pads into the forest
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Stalks in . P.i.s.s.e.d