Life's Daily Dose Of Wit & Wisdom

Life's Daily Dose Of Wit & Wisdom

by J. N. Hospitable

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781456737283
Publisher: AuthorHouse
Publication date: 03/31/2011
Pages: 388
Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.86(d)

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Life's Daily Dose of Wit & Wisdom

Wit & Wisdom to enlighten your day
By J. N. Hospitable

AuthorHouse

Copyright © 2011 J. N. Hospitable
All right reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-4567-3728-3


Chapter One

January

January 1st

* A wise person keeps an open mind and a closed mouth. (Unknown)

January 2nd

* Authority is like a bank account, the more you draw on it the less you have. (Unknown - THP)

January 3rd

* There is no limit to what can be accomplished if it doesn't matter who gets the credit. (Ralph Emerson - THP)

January 4th

* Lead, follow, or get out of the way. Just do something. (Unknown)

January 5th

* The person who has no fire in himself cannot ignite others. (Unknown - THP)

January 6th

* Today's opportunity is yesterday's dream and tomorrow's memory. (Unknown)

January 7th

* Grudges are clots in the arteries leading to a happy heart. (Unknown - THP)

January 8th

* Never judge a man by his relatives; he did not choose them. (Unknown - THP)

January 9th

* Caution - know the ropes before you pull the strings. (Unknown)

January 10th

* People who think the world revolves around them have no sense of direction (Proverb)

January 11th

* Stupidity is forever, ignorance can be fixed. (Unknown)

January 12th

* Fools grow without watering. (Unknown - THP)

January 13th

* Speak well of your enemies; after all you made them. (Unknown)

January 14th

* Some friends remind us of blisters; they don'ts how up until after the work is done. (Unknown)

January 15th

* A wise man thinks ahead; a fool doesn't and then he brags about it (Proverbs 13:16)

January 16th

* Happiness increases the more you spread it around. (Unknown)

January 17th

* He who loses honesty has nothing else to lose. (Unknown)

January 18th

* Hot words never result in good judgment. (Unknown)

January 19th

* The path to success is always under construction. (Unknown)

January 20th

* Don't let yesterday use up too much of today. (Will Rogers)

January 21st

* Yesterday is a cancelled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have, so spend it wisely. (Unknown)

January 22nd

* He who is all wrapped up in himself is overdressed. (Unknown - THP)

January 23rd

* Opportunities always look bigger going than coming (Proverb)

January 24th

* If you correct yourself, others won't have to. (Unknown)

January 25th

* Remember, you can't fix a broken promise. (Unknown)

January 26th * If you want to be the top dog you need to get off of the porch. (Unknown)

January 27th

* The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm. (Unknown)

January 28th

* When anger rises, think of the consequences. (Confucius)

January 29th

* The best sense of humor belongs to the man or woman that can laugh at him or herself. (Unknown)

January 30th

* We can learn much from wise words, little from wise cracks and nothing from wise guys. (Unknown)

January 31st

* I don't think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday. (Abraham Lincoln)

Chapter Two

February

February 1st

* Humor is the lubricating oil of life; it prevents friction and spreads happiness. (Unknown)

February 2nd

* I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. (Unknown)

February 3rd

* You will face many defeats in your life, but never let yourself be defeated. (Unknown)

February 4th

* You sound reasonable ... Time to up my medication. (Unknown)

February 5th

* A pat on the back is only a few inches away from a kick in the butt (Proverb)

February 6th

* If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed. (A. Einstein)

February 7th

* You only have one chance to make a good first impression. (Unknown)

February 8th

* Build a good reputation as it will follow you around for life. (Unknown)

February 9th

* Humor is the lifeboat on the river of life. (Unknown - THP)

February 10th

* A spy with flatulence will always blow his cover (Proverb)

February 11th

* Good ideas need landing gear as well as wings. (C.D. Jackson – THP)

February 12th

* Nothing dies more quickly than a new idea in a closed mind. (Unknown)

February 13th

* It is not the IQ but the "I WILL" that is important. (Unknown)

February 14th

* A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't. (Unknown)

February 15th

* Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in getting up every time we do. (Confucius)

February 16th

* An exhaustive study of police records shows that no woman has ever shot her husband while he was doing the dishes or laundry (Unknown)

February 17th

* A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's. She changes it more often ... (Unknown)

February 18th

* Some people will believe anything if it is whispered to them. (Pierre de Miramax)

February 19th

* Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive. (George Carlin)

February 20th

* Everything has its beauty but not everyone sees it. (Confucius)

February 21st

* Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. (Unknown)

February 22nd

* Where there is a will, there are a whole lot of relatives (Unknown)

February 23rd

* What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are small matters compared to what lies within us (Unknown)

February 24th

* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others (Unknown)

February 25th

* Two wrongs may not make a right but three rights make a left (Proverb)

February 26th

* The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. (Unknown)

February 27th

* Procrastination can be fun. All you do is just wait and see (Unknown)

February 28th

* Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else (Will Rogers)

February 29th

* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane (Unknown)

Chapter Three

March

March 1st

* Every day get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If you're not there, go to work (Unknown)

March 2nd

* Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy (Unknown)

March 3rd

* Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics (Unknown)

March 4th

* No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible (Unknown)

March 5th

* A man is at his tallest when he stoops to help a child (Proverb)

March 6th

* It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions (Unknown)

March 7th

* A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man (Unknown)

March 8th

* You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. (Bob Hope)

March 9th

* A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat (Unknown)

March 10th

* A fly will not get into a closed mouth (Proverb)

March 11th

* The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is probably a poor judge of distance (Unknown)

March 12th

* An optimist is a person who sees a green light everywhere. The pessimist sees only the red light. But the truly wise person is color blind. (Dr. Albert Schweitzer)

March 13th

* Be the change you wish to see in the world. (Gandhi)

March 14th

* Sometimes the only way you can take a really good look at yourselves is through someone else's eyes (Unknown)

March 15th

* A chain is no stronger than its weakest link (Proverb)

March 16th

* Did you notice no one is listening until you fart? (Unknown)

March 17th

* To do nothing is sometimes a good remedy. (Hippocrates)

March 18th

* A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle. (Unknown)

March 19th * Live everyday as if it was your last, because one of these days you will be right (Unknown)

March 20th

* A best friend is like a four leaf clover, Hard to find and lucky to have (Proverb)

March 21st

* Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep. (Unknown)

March 22nd

* Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them more. (Unknown)

March 23rd

* When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded. (Unknown)

March 24th

* Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking. (Unknown)

March 25th

* Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. (Confucius)

March 26th

* Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film. (Unknown)

March 27th

* Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. (Unknown)

March 28th

* If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side. (Unknown)

March 29th

* When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets. (Unknown)

March 30th

* Baseball is wrong - man with four balls cannot walk. (Confucius)

March 31st

* I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid. (Unknown)

Chapter Four

April

April 1st

* Children may only be 10% of our population but they're 100% of our future. (Unknown)

April 2nd

* I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me. (Unknown)

April 3rd

* One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory. (Unknown)

April 4th

* For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

April 5th

* A wise head keeps a still tongue (Proverb)

April 6th

* You know times are changing when people are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke. (Unknown)

April 7th

* Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go. (Oscar Wilde)

April 8th

* I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you. (Unknown)

April 9th

* If you judge people, you have no time to love them. ( Mother Teresa)

April 10th

* Don't drink and park, accidents cause people. (Confucius)

April 11th

* Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. (R. Emerson)

April 12th

* Be a good listener. Your ears will never get you in trouble. (Unknown)

April 13th

* Never be afraid to try, remember ... Amateurs built the ark, Professionals built the Titanic. (Unknown)

April 14th

* A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on (Winston Churchill)

April 15th

* Our faults irritate us most when we see them in others. (Proverb)

April 16th

* Integrity is shown when no one is looking. (Unknown)

April 17th

* The truth of the matter is that you always know the right thing to do. The hard part is doing it. (Unknown)

April 18th

* We're not being rude. You're just insignificant. (Unknown)

April 19th

* The secret of life isn't in what happens to you, but what you do with what happens to you. (Unknown)

April 20th

* A wise man learns by the mistakes of others, a fool by his own. (Latin Proverb)

April 21st

* Problems are to the mind what exercise is tot he muscles, they toughen up and you become stronger (Unknown)

April 22nd

* Don't ever assume that there's plenty of time left In life to tell someone how much they mean to you.....do it today! (Unknown)

April 23rd

* When did our wild oats turn into prunes and all bran? (Unknown)

April 24th

* Keep your words sweet.....you never know when you might have to eat them. (Unknown)

April 25th

* All good things are difficult to achieve; and bad things are very easy to get. (Confucius)

April 26th

* Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids (Unknown)

April 27th

* Remember.....that money doesn't buy class. (Unknown)

April 28th

* I've learned....that when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere. (Unknown)

April 29th

* If your sister/brother hits you, don't hit him/ her back. They always catch the second person. (Unknown)

April 30th

* Man who drive like hell bound to get there. (Confucius)

Chapter Five

May

May 1st

* Laughing is good exercise; it's like jogging on the inside. (Unknown)

May 2nd

* Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. (Unknown)

May 3rd

* Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment. (Mark Twain)

May 4th

* A day of sorrow is longer than a month of joy (Proverb)

May 5th

* War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left. (Confucius)

May 6th

* Ever notice how the average tourist wants to go where there are no tourists? (Unknown)

May 7th

* Trying to squash a rumor is like trying to un-ring a bell. (Unknown)

May 8th

* Try not to become a man of success but a man of value. (Albert Einstein)

May 9th

* No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent. (Abraham Lincoln)

May 10th

* The way some people find fault, you'd think there was some kind of reward. (Unknown)

(Continues...)



Excerpted from Life's Daily Dose of Wit & Wisdom by J. N. Hospitable Copyright © 2011 by J. N. Hospitable. Excerpted by permission of AuthorHouse. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Table of Contents

Contents

Introduction....................vi
January....................1
February....................33
March....................63
April....................95
May....................126
June....................158
July....................189
August....................221
September....................253
October....................284
November....................316
December....................347

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