Out of the Darkness and into the Light: My Journey to Becoming a Medium
138
Out of the Darkness and into the Light: My Journey to Becoming a Medium
138eBook
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Overview
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781504308274 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Balboa Press AU |
| Publication date: | 05/08/2017 |
| Sold by: | Barnes & Noble |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 138 |
| File size: | 312 KB |
About the Author
Read an Excerpt
CHAPTER 1
Memories of my life
My very first memory I have is of me sitting on the hardwood floor in the house I shared with my parents and eventually my little brother 3 years or so later.
I was in the lounge room by myself while my mother was in the house somewhere, I remember thinking that the floor was very cold and I wanted my cat Mia.
I was around a year old, my parents had a photo of that day and I remembered it clearly as if it was yesterday.
I remember many other memories of my life between then and now but the following are the memories that have been stuck in my mind over the years The next memory I have that is clear as day was when I was 7 years old, I woke up screaming and crying when my father came into the room and tried to wake me up.
I was begging my father in my dream like state to let me go through the wall, and that they had promised I could go home, but now they said I couldn't.
The next morning, my father told me that when he was trying to wake me up, my eyes looked like I was staring right through him; he said it had freaked him out.
It was a very real experience for me, as I still felt homesick many days later, homesick for a place I didn't know and had never been to as far as I knew and it's something that has been in the back of my mind since then.
I know parents like to comfort their children and tell them it was just a nightmare and I know because I do the same when my girls have had nightmares too, because we don't want them to dwell on it, we want them to dream happy dreams, even when we know that it may not be possible, but we try because we love our children and I know for a fact I would do anything for my children for them to not feel bad, hurt, upset or anything like that that a nightmare may cause, so I could see where my father was coming from that night, but what I didn't tell my father, was that it wasn't a nightmare, in fact it had been my home, it was a portal to it and my real family was on the other side of it.
Sounds bizarre? Oh yes, for me it took years to figure out what it all meant and I will explain it all further into the book.
My next memory, I was asleep in bed one night when I was about thirteen years old, I woke up with strange thoughts in my head, I had this feeling that I would never get to wear a bra, get my period, get a boyfriend, drive a car, get married, have the four kids I wanted and finally just to move into a house of my own one day, I wanted to be on my own and not have to listen to my mother bang on my door while vaccuming on a Saturday morning at 6 am, and I had no idea where these thoughts came from, but I wondered if maybe it was a premonition or if I was just scared I would never get a chance to live them, but what I have learnt in my years of life is that a lot of girls feel this way, a lot of them think they will never get to experience these things because they feel so far away.
How amazing it was to me to finally do each of those things, as I felt as though I had never experienced them before, I think I had been dreaming about a life when I had died young, and I remembered never getting to experience any of those things.
There are times that I have wished my life had turned out differently, I wish I was rich and lived in a beautiful mansion and had a few holiday houses in different parts of the world, so that when I want the sun or snow I can just pack up and leave whenever I want, but like I said this is the real life of me, and those things are not in my future nor have ever been in my past.
To understand me, you need to know who I am and how I came to be.
My parents were both full time workers who worked hard, which gave us plenty of time on our own, and when we weren't at school we were at daycare, which although I wasn't that interested in as I got older, as I thought I could look after myself as I became a teenager but I made a lot of life long friends.
I grew up hearing voices in my head that I figured were just in my head, and that everyone could hear them too so I ignored them most of the time, I found they became easy to ignore as long as I was busy, I didn't have a lot of friends growing up so I spent a lot of my time alone, even at school and day care. Most of the time I would play with the younger kids because they would be innocent of drama, and I found drama to be very emotionally draining on me.
I had no idea at the time that I was an empath so when I got picked on or people were nasty to me, I would retreat into myself and hide away, if I only knew then what I know now I would never have let them dim my light, but it wasn't all bad I had a few shining lights in my life which helped me to become the strong independent woman I have become.
I was the first born child with my brother following three and half years later, and we really only had each other as we had grown up in Adelaide, South Australia, and our parents had immigrated from England a couple of years before my birth, so we had no Aunties, Uncles, Grandparents or any other extended family to talk to or be with as they were all living in England, and this was long before the internet.
We wrote letters to people if we wanted to talk to someone, and it took forever to get there, and forever to get back to us.
My dad has three sisters and my mum has one sister, and I met my mums family when I was about sixteen, my grandmother, my mums sister, her husband and two children, a boy and a girl who were younger than my brother and I, and it was the first time in my life that I actually got to feel what it was like to have family.
They had arrived in Australia from England to live with us until they could find a place of their own.
It was my Aunty that I felt the closest to, she cooked real home cooked meals and desserts including rhubarb pies which I loved, and I felt that she actually listened to me and really heard what I said, which was very rare in our house, as our parents were busy most of the time with work, or household chores as well as their hobbies, I didn't feel left out really, just lonely sometimes.
I always felt different growing up, everyone in my family had brown hair and brown eyes where as I had blonde hair and green eyes so we would always joke I was the milk mans, I wasn't because I have seen my birth certificate but I always wondered before I had seen it.
It was so rare to have someone in my family who wasn't my parents or my brother, I had never experienced that before, to have other people who knew my parents since they were kids was really bizarre for me, especially only growing up with the four of us.
In all the time I knew them, I never really knew them, the kids were too young for me to really get to know them, my grandmother was from the older generation, and my uncle was pretty cool at the time, I remembered him smoking pipes and letting us kids sit on his lap at times, but that's about it.
I remember thinking we weren't a normal family after watching many other families together but they were mine, and to be honest I didn't really know any different.
Life carried on when they moved into their own home, we all went back to doing the things we did before they came into our lives.
We didn't see them again until I gave birth to my second daughter, she was just a newborn when we got the call that my uncle had passed away.
That was really shocking for us as he had passed away at such a young age, and after the funeral it was once again back to normal, no contact, which is strange but true, not sure why, but I guess life just happens.
I kind of just got used to having no other family around, but had a few close friends that shared their wonderful families with me. When I was about sixteen my fathers youngest sister came to visit from England with her young son, he was such a cutie, and he was such a sweet little thing.
I loved having them both in the house, it was so nice having a toddler in the house, and it was so amazing having my aunt in the house, she was closer to my age by only ten years, so we got along great, we had so much fun together and we had a ball while she was there.
My aunt was the first person in the family to keep in contact with me and made the effort to stay in contact after the internet and facebook made it easier to connect years later.
When she left to go back home, I missed her so much, and my little cousin too, I knew I would miss his cute little face forever.
About sixteen years or so later, my cute little cousin passed away suddenly, his life had taken a few bumps and turns as most of our lives do, but the next thing he knew, he had died and was now in spirit, I was shocked to see his spirit years and years later, but was heart warmed at the same time, I had questions like what had taken so long, and where had he been all this time.
He later told me that his death was an exit point for him which he was unaware of at the time, but once he had crossed over he understood for the first time.
An exit point is a few places in our lives where we choose to leave this world, we can leave at anytime during those exit points or we can choose to stay, so if you choose to leave at that point, you will.
There is a religious based stigma around suicide that you go to hell, or you become a lost soul in limbo, but please these are just not true, these are all written by men who put them into a book just so that they could control the masses, this is not what Source / God wanted or said!
These are man made words and since no one except the ones that have crossed over know for sure then I'm going to trust them first.
These are not evil spirits, they are not going to send me to hell, these are just kind, loving, beautiful souls that were once human beings just like us, and I am yet to come across one that is doomed to hell or likes to torment me in a horrible way, and do you know why?
I will not allow anything negative in my life, the only thing to fear is fear itself, if you believe that you have an evil spirit that will haunt and scare you, it will, if you believe that you will go to hell for believing in a God you don't believe in, then you will, you create your own reality and I have proven that to myself by changing the way I think.
As soon as I refused to live in fear nothing scared me, as soon as I said, "Nothing and no one can hurt me, I will not allow it." Nothing ever has, in fact I fear nothing anymore.
So please, "Think first and feel second", like my friend Erik likes to say.
Now I would like to tell you about an experience I had last week, I had just found a picture of my aunt and my cousin from when they had visited when I was young, and I heard my cousin ask me if I would send it to my aunt, so I told him, " Sure, I will do it in the morning", and then he said, " She could really use it right now if that's ok?", so I sent it.
He then proceeded to ask me if I would tell her that he loved her and that he was sorry.
So off I went to bed thinking she may be comforted by this, and that my cousin would be really happy that I had sent the message, and he would leave me be for a while, not that I didn't like having him because I do, but its nice to have a break from spirit sometimes, but was I wrong, all night I had Peter Allan who had been with me all week for some reason and my cousin singing the song Tentafield Saddler all night long, and I mean all night long, and in the morning I asked my husband what the heck Tentafield Saddler meant other than the song, and he said, "I have no clue, why don't you google it?", so I did.
I found the lyrics to the song and sent them to my aunt who had no idea about the song other than she had heard of it but that's it, so my cousin told me to tell her it's about the words, so I asked her to really read the words, as they are the message, and would you believe she actually knew exactly what he was talking about, apparently the song was pretty much my cousins life, and some of the words talked about things that only my aunt and my cousin knew about, so it was proof for her that her son was talking to me, as I feel the messages I sent previously although appreciated, weren't real proof that he was around her, but this song did, so this was his Christmas gift for her, absolute proof that he was there with her not only during normal times but especially through the holidays.
Such a beautiful gesture, and when the message was received loud and clear, my cousin and Peter Allen blew me and my aunt a kiss and they left, leaving me feeling loved but free since the night before, as much as I love helping the living connect with their loved ones, it can also be draining too, and some people have no clue as to how much energy it takes to do a reading, but this is my life now and I love it.
I have learnt so much from spirit, they are loving, non judgemental, and honest and that is so refreshing when you are surrounded by many people who are the opposite in this world.
Being an Empath, I can always tell when someone is not telling me the truth, I have always had that ability, even as a kid.
It feels very disrespectful to me, why lie when you could just tell the truth? People always find out in the end anyway so what is the point?
I am guilty of this too, I used to lie so people would not get hurt, because I thought that if I lied and they didn't get hurt then I was doing a good thing for them, but let me tell you, it doesn't work that way, people always find out, one way or another and its better to hear the truth from you than from hearing it from someone else after you have lied.
So please think before you speak, there are many Empaths in this world who have this ability, and they may straight up ask you if you are lying, and that wont be a very comfortable conversation.
I rarely call people out on their lies, only because I try to pick my battles these days, and sometimes its just not worth the hassle for me anyway, but think about that next time you think you may lie to someone as they may just call you out, as I do sometimes if I think its necessary.
When I was eighteen, my dad's side of the family came to visit, we had my fathers mother, his sister and my cousin who was about seven at the time, I believe, she was a sick little girl, she was in a wheel chair, she couldn't communicate, and I know she had a huge amount of other things wrong with her but I was just a kid myself and I had had no experience with children really, and especially no experience with a child with disabilities at all, and I had no clue if she could really understand anything that was said.
Us kids were not told much, just that she was sick, and it broke my heart that I could talk, walk, run etc when she couldn't, she would look at me, it felt like she was looking right into my soul and I felt as though she wanted to be just like me, and it made mevery sad.
I could feel her words in my head, I could hear what she was saying but it was like her words had been put directly in my head, so I thought I was just being crazy again and must be making it up, I didn't know at the time that I was talking to her telepathically.
Children who are special often have a direct line to Source / God, they are born with other ways of using their senses, they are very special children, have a look in their eyes, they see and hear more than you could ever realise.
She would tell me it was so hard in that body, because she wanted to do the things I could do, and that she wanted to play with me too, but her body wouldn't let her.
I felt at the time that she wouldn't get very old, I felt her life was literally slipping away, and I was right, a few months after her return to England she passed away.
I was told on my eighteenth birthday, I got a call from my mother at my birthday get together, she told me she had passed away, and immediately I saw her being born to me, as my child, and once I realised what I had just seen in the vision I dismissed it, I figured again I was just nuts, I had no real way of knowing that, and I figured I would never really know if she did, but when I gave birth to my first daughter I knew without a doubt that my cousin had come back to me as my daughter this time, and with that she would get a perfect body, a perfect life (for her), she had chosen to reincarnate and that was such a beautiful moment for me.
I didn't really know much about anything with my aunt, uncle and cousin, because they spent most of their time looking after my cousin, and children don't really understand the sacrifices that people make for their children, it doesn't really give them time for anything else in life, but they do it out of love
I would be so jealous of the fact that other people got to experience grandparents that loved them and cooked for them, and hugged them, I just didn't have that at all.
That was all I had ever wanted growing up, but isn't that what we all look for growing up?, we all want what we don't have, and the ones that do, don't always appreciate what they have.
My life was a series of events that have been up and down, I had good days and bad days as most of us do, but because of what I experienced, I didn't write about my story so I could get sympathy, or for people to be judgemental, I wrote about it because unless you know about my past, you wont really understand my future, as its all connected.
(Continues…)
Excerpted from "Out of the Darkness and into the Light"
by .
Copyright © 2017 Alana Clark.
Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
Acknowledgements, v,
Appreciation, ix,
Testimonials, xi,
Introduction, xv,
Chapter 1: Memories of my life, 1,
Chapter 2: Bullying and inappropriate behavior, 16,
Chapter 3: How bullying effects everyone, 29,
Chapter 4: Life, learning to be a Medium, 46,
Chapter 5: Follow your heart, 59,
Chapter 6: Meditation and Believing in Yourself, 70,
Chapter 7: Spirit Communicators, 90,
Chapter 8: Sign's your loved ones are around, 101,
Afterword, 117,