Author Dianne Crows spirit name is 2Crowsflying. Her spirit guide is High Horse. And this is her story. In Surrender Yourself, she shares the details of her spiritual journey.
Her story begins in the seventies at age eighteen, pregnant and married, traveling Australia in a panel van and follows through to the present day as she comes to terms with who she is. This memoir narrates how later in life Crows was finding out who she was, what she wanted in life, and how she was going to achieve it. She was craving the spiritual side. She had experienced the good and the badfrom the breakdown in her marriage to the loss of loved ones.
She once questioned how she was going to cope as the universe continued to throw so many lessons at her. Surrender Yourself explains how Crows found peace and her calling in life through her spirit guide, her Indians, and her healing room. She puts a voice to the experiences that have shaped her being.
Author Dianne Crows spirit name is 2Crowsflying. Her spirit guide is High Horse. And this is her story. In Surrender Yourself, she shares the details of her spiritual journey.
Her story begins in the seventies at age eighteen, pregnant and married, traveling Australia in a panel van and follows through to the present day as she comes to terms with who she is. This memoir narrates how later in life Crows was finding out who she was, what she wanted in life, and how she was going to achieve it. She was craving the spiritual side. She had experienced the good and the badfrom the breakdown in her marriage to the loss of loved ones.
She once questioned how she was going to cope as the universe continued to throw so many lessons at her. Surrender Yourself explains how Crows found peace and her calling in life through her spirit guide, her Indians, and her healing room. She puts a voice to the experiences that have shaped her being.
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Overview
Author Dianne Crows spirit name is 2Crowsflying. Her spirit guide is High Horse. And this is her story. In Surrender Yourself, she shares the details of her spiritual journey.
Her story begins in the seventies at age eighteen, pregnant and married, traveling Australia in a panel van and follows through to the present day as she comes to terms with who she is. This memoir narrates how later in life Crows was finding out who she was, what she wanted in life, and how she was going to achieve it. She was craving the spiritual side. She had experienced the good and the badfrom the breakdown in her marriage to the loss of loved ones.
She once questioned how she was going to cope as the universe continued to throw so many lessons at her. Surrender Yourself explains how Crows found peace and her calling in life through her spirit guide, her Indians, and her healing room. She puts a voice to the experiences that have shaped her being.
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781504300995 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Balboa Press AU |
| Publication date: | 01/25/2016 |
| Sold by: | Barnes & Noble |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 112 |
| File size: | 137 KB |
About the Author
Read an Excerpt
Surrender Yourself
By Dianne Crows
Balboa Press
Copyright © 2016 Dianne CrowsAll rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-5043-0098-8
CHAPTER 1
Learn from yesterday, Live for today, and Hope for tomorrow
Albert Einstein
We all have our own beliefs, I guess.
I always knew there was more to life than to touch, see, and smell. I remember my mum going for psychic readings when I was in my teens. It fascinated me but she never spoke of anything she had been told by the psychic reader.
I was pregnant and married at eighteen and thought I had it all; we were travelling around Australia with all our belongings in a panel van. That was the seventies for you, not a care in the world.
We made it as far as Townsville when, the car broke down. It was the bell-housing, and we had no money to fix it. So John, my husband, got a job and we moved into a caravan park. My brother Dennis, his wife Glenda and her family were staying there too. We had company for a while, but they moved on and kept travelling. I remember spending most of my time cramped in the caravan.
I was glad when December arrived; it was time to have my baby. I had no idea what I was in for, or what to expect; I had no one to tell me. I was on my own with this one, and on December, 5, 1974, a nine pound baby boy was born. We named him, Gavin, and that little boy was what helped keep me strong for the next twenty years.
Six weeks after Gavin was born, we had the car up and running again and off we headed- unregistered, no driver's license, and with a baby in the back. We were headed to New South Wales and guess what? We made it all the way, not a cop to be seen.
Scone was our destination. Mum and Dad had bought a pub called the Willow Tree Hotel. Things were looking up. We had somewhere to stay, and I had a job, and a mum to help with the baby. I worked in the pub and John worked in a bike shop across the road from the pub for a while. We stayed in Scone for two years, and then moved to Aberdeen. When Mum and Dad sold the pub, I ended up with a job at the meat works. I stayed there for a few years, and Jon worked there as a fitter. I made a lot of friends there, including a few who were 'interesting' to say the least. Like the Knights, I'm sure some of you have read that story. My brother Dennis, moved to Scone after seeing them a few years earlier in Townsville, but sadly, by that time, he and Glenda had separated, and he was with his new partner, Pam. Dennis and Pam only stayed a few months. They headed back to Townsville where they stayed. After some time, Mum and Dad had packed up and moved to Orange. I missed Mum and Dad; we often went over for a weekend.
My marriage was a struggle from day one. I guess I just wanted things to work and Gav to have a father. Who the hell was I kidding? After we moved to Denman, I was working at the Royal Hotel as a barmaid and I hated it. Gav had started school for the first time at Martindale, a very tiny school, just out of Denman. I remember that look on his face that first day, God love him. John was working at a lawn mower place in Muswellbrook, but we didn't stay there long.
We moved back to Aberdeen and I went back to the meat works. John got himself a job working in a bike shop in Muswellbrook, so he was in his glory. It was a Harley Davidson shop and he came to own many Harley's. He loved buying the early model 65 pan knuckle and shovel head motors that looked like they were ready for the scrap heap. He would rebuild them; he was very good at it, and always made good money when he sold them. With new cash in hand, he would head off to Mount Wilson to buy the next one. My lounge room often had bike parts in there getting rebuilt.
We had made good friends with the one family, Bev, Wes and Toni. Gav and their son, Toni, were at the same school, Aberdeen Public.
We learned that a house six miles out of town was up for rent, so we moved out there. The only thing wrong with that location was that we only had one car. Guess who had that car all the time? I used to walk home from work. Gav and I were stuck at home all weekend by ourselves; too bad if I needed milk or bread, but we entertained ourselves. I always thought Gav would be a fire fighter living out of town. We had a two hundred litre drum set up in the back yard to burn the rubbish, and every time you would look out the window, there was Gav lighting and stoking the fire. He was fascinated by it.
After we had lived there for a few years, I finally got my own car. It was a Volkswagen, and it was about time I had my own car! Most weekends, John was out with his mates, and he only came home for a shower and a feed before heading off to the next party. I was tired of being alone, so I made a decision; Gav and I would be better off on our own. I packed what I could in the car, and Gav and I, went off into the sunset on our own. We headed towards a town called Orange.
Mum and Dad lived in a block of units there, and Gav and I stayed with them for a while. I got a job at the Telford Motor Inn as a house maid, where I made myself a good friend. Gav got settled into Bletchington School. My sister Sharyn moved over with her four children, Kristy, Trevor, Peta and Megan. Gav and I loved that, and we were always together. Each child would take it in turns in sleeping over.
After a year or so, John and I had reconciled, and we moved back to Muswellbrook. John had rented a beautiful unit, and we set up again. I got a job at a local motor inn as a tray maid. Gav started high school and John was doing shut down work at a power station and bringing in good money. Once again I made some good friends, but when work started to die down for John, we had another decision to make.
By this time, Mum, Dad, Sharyn and her four children had all moved to Townsville, so we decided to give it a go. We packed up and headed back to Townsville to live back with the family again. We sold all our furniture and headed off on another adventure. After a long two-day drive, we made it. We moved in with the family until we got settled in with jobs and our own house.
On the second day, I ended up in hospital with a blood clot in my left calf. I remember going into a panic. Thirty years earlier, my pop had died of a blood clot, but my sister Sharyn reassured me I would be fine. Things had changed a hell of a lot, since Pop died, she reminded me, and that made me feel a whole lot better. On my third day in hospital, I had my first spiritual experience. I was just lying on the bed when a voice spoke to me.
"Have a look at your drip."
I was confused; I didn't know who said that. I looked down and noticed there was air in the tube leading to the cannula on my hand, so I pinched the drip at the end of the fluid. I'm not sure why I did that, but it seemed to be the right thing to do. I called for a nurse, and she sprang into 'panic station' mode immediately. The drip was pulled out, and replaced by a new one in the other hand. Great, I thought, another jab with a needle, I was already feeling like a pin cushion. When things settled down, I asked the nurse what had happened. I didn't understand why people were in such a panic. She explained that someone must have been watching over me that day, because if I haven't noticed the air bubble in time, it could have gone into my vein, and I would have had a massive heart attack. I don't know if I should thank my Pop, or an angel, but I am, sure that someone was looking out for me that day. I never mentioned it to anyone; no one would have believed me anyway.
John and I found jobs and a nice place to live. Gav was going to Pimlico State High School and things were good. I had my family with me and we did everything together. I loved being with my brother Dennis. On Friday nights we often had beers and homemade hamburgers. There were about fifteen of us, and these were the best nights with lots of laughs. We stayed there for a few years. I was working in a commercial laundry, running the wash room. I lost heaps of weight, as it was always sweaty. I hated the humidity, but I always made the best of things and made friends.
Once again, work was not looking good for John. John had gone to have a week with his mate in Swansea. I remember that week, as a cyclone was brewing. It ended up just being a lot of rain and high winds. While John was in Swansea, his boss rang to let John know that he would have to let him go. He suggested that if John could get work where he was, he should go for it. Once again, we packed up our lives. We moved back to New South Wales, where we moved in with John's mate Danny who owned his own house. We all got along so it was working out fine. Mum and Dad, by this time, had moved back to Orange, and Gav and I decided to head over for a few days. That was not good, Gav got offered an apprenticeship with my brother in-law as a painter and decorator and decided to stay. I knew he would be fine. Gav was living with Mum and Dad, and my little boy was growing up.
John was working in Sydney traveling back and forth every day and I was working in a laundry at Cardiff. Danny sold his house and we all rented a house together at Caves Beach. I went as often as I could to Orange to see Gav. I always travelled with my Aunty June, as it gave her a chance to be with her sister. We went by train and always had a good trip and some good laughs.
CHAPTER 2'I am' and 'Gratitude' Are the most powerful words
My dad was very sick. My dad had a lawn mower accident when I was in my teens. He was mowing the grounds near a heated swimming pool, and the blade had come off the mower, and had gone through his ankle. The blade was stuck in his ankle for hours, as they had to work out the best way to remove it. Maybe if they had taken his leg off at his knee, while he was still young, then perhaps, it would have made things a lot easier for him. My dad had nothing but trouble with his ankle and leg for the following twenty years. The doctors now decided to remove his leg off at the knee, which had made it very hard at his age and for Mum.
My sister was good and helped Mum and Dad a lot. Sadly my dad went back for another operation and died on May, 7, 1992. My mum was devastated; she had lost her soul mate. My sisters and I had lost our dad and the children had lost their pop. This was a sad time in my life, and I felt a piece of my heart was taken. I felt empty and I was glad that Gav was there to stay with Mum in her bad times. I knew he would be good company for her and would keep her busy.
John had realized how much I missed Gav and he also quite liked the town, Orange. So we packed up and moved back to Orange. I was glad we were back as a family again. I worked in the meat works at Blayney for a while, until I got a job in Orange at the Calare Nursing Home in the laundry. I made the most amazing friends and had the best laughs and good times with these guys, Denise, Sue, Margaret, Justin and Donna. I had lost track of them for a while, but thanks to Facebook, found them again. That's where I met Kathy, who is my dearest and best friend.
Living back in Orange was also good for Mum, as we could spend time together. Mum would always visit on Sunday, and would cook some scones and a few slices. I would cook a baked dinner, and then drop Mum back home. Gav was now working for the council and was starting to make some really good mates.
By the time I had reached my late thirties, I had the most amazing collection of American Indian things. Some I brought myself and a lot given to me as gifts. Even a tee- pee that actually smoked, that came from America. My home was full of American Indian stuff, but at the time never thought any more about it. But I guess, even then, someone was trying to get my attention. Being married to a non-believer of the spiritual world, I never read anything into it and life went on. In all the moves, I managed to give away all my American Indian things. All except this one Indian medicine bag, I had brought myself. I was attracted to this medicine bag and for some reason and hung onto it. You know what they say, everything happens for a reason. I am a firm believer that if you are meant to have a special gift, you will have it, and the universe will find a way to make it happen. I know what mine is now, but I didn't know at the time.
Seven years had passed quickly. I was in my forties, and my life was not good. My son, who kept me strong and gave me something to focus on, had suddenly grown up and found the love of his life. He had met Sarina who is a very kind, caring and loving girl. He had fallen in love with Sarina and they eventually married.
I had found myself with a Jack Russell pup. My husband brought me the pup for my birthday. This pup, Jack, stayed in my life for the next seven years filling the lonely void in my life. I dedicated my life to my pup, Jack. That way; I didn't have to focus on my marriage or its problems. I had a lot lessons to learn.
We were on the move again, only this time, I was going back to Townsville with no son. I'll always remember that drive. I was in my car, with a dog and a bird, and John was driving his car. I cried all the way, worried about what I had done, so I convinced myself, this will fix my marriage and all will be good.
We moved in with my brother, Dennis, and his family. I remember the date, as it was September, 11, 2001; the day of the devastation in America. We found a flat to rent and we were only in it for four months, until we finally brought our first house. I could see the potential, as it was an old Queenslander. I was back working in a laundry and John was working for a large franchise company. We had to drive back to Orange in February, for Gav and Sarina's wedding. We drove down and back in four days, John, Dennis, Pam and I. What a trip, but a beautiful wedding. Sarina was finally taking my place and taking care of my boy. You know that old saying 'A daughter always needs her mother, but a son chooses his wife.' But in saying that, we were blessed with this wonderful person.
Life went on and I was working long hours and spending time by myself. Until the day that Gav and Sarina headed up for a holiday with us, with Sasha, their dog. We called Sasha, Jack's brother, as Sasha and Jack spent every day together. I was beside myself watching every car coming around the corner. I was excited to show them this house we had brought and the potential, and seeing my son again. I had a great two weeks with them, but yes, it came to an end and they were heading back to Orange. I was again crying all day.
I came home from work one day to find John with a big smile on his face. John had said Gav had rung, and I have some good news. I started to get excited. John said "Settle down, no, they are not moving here." My heart sunk. John then said "But they are moving to Brisbane which was only one and a half hour's flight away." I thought "That's right, things weren't so bad." I walked around all night with a smile from ear to ear.
I got to spend every Sunday with my brother, Dennis. It was our time, and I loved it. I remember having a psychic reading with Pam Goodman, a few years earlier. Pam said, you don't know your brother on a heart level, but you will. I didn't understand what she meant at that time, but I do now.
My brother always headed out to the dump early Sunday morning, with a trailer full of palm leaves and rubbish. That was something he and his black bum staffe dog did together. He loved animals, just like I did.
Before I go any further with this, I had a dream about six weeks earlier. I dreamt that I had gone to look out our window from the high set house we lived in, and was looking down. In the dream, there was my brother, in his car slouched over his wheel. When I woke up, I thought to myself, what a strange dream. My brother loved his beer, big time, so I put it down to another drunk night.
It was about the middle of February, on a Sunday, when I got a phone call. My brother was on the way home from the dump, and had had a massive heart attack. Two army guys found him. He had crossed four lanes of traffic and ended up in front of a row of shops, slumped over his car wheel, with his dog licking his face trying to wake him up. It was very early and there was not much traffic around. Thank God or there could have been more people involved in a car crash. There was the dream.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Surrender Yourself by Dianne Crows. Copyright © 2016 Dianne Crows. Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
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