Disconnected men hide out in plain view: in our churches, in our families and in our communities. They are competent, capable men who quietly 'do their duty' and attract little attention. They are fairly happy guys, relatively unemotional and capable of carrying heavy loads of responsibility, but are very difficult to get to know beyond superficial friendship. A closer examination inside their marriages reveals a desert strewn with emotionally emaciated spouses. While their competence may build the church, organize a group, or run a company, they haven't the slightest notion how to connect intimately with those they love. Their wives suffer, usually in silence, while the church and culture press past this couple secretly falling apart.
Jim Turner was that disconnected man going about his life, happily fulfilling his duty within his own self-protective bubble, until God suddenly burst it in a most horrific way. His story starts when that devastation left him clinging precariously to the remaining shreds of his broken marriage. Jim longs to share with other disconnected men what he learned through that ordeal, to help them understand their disobedience and show how they can achieve real connection with those they love.
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About the Author
Jim Turner has been in youth or pastoral ministry for over twenty-five years and has personally experienced the pain and damage caused by disconnection. He is divorced as a direct result of his former disconnection, father of four incredible young adults, and now remarried and living in the delight of being truly connected with his wife. He has individually fought the battle to overcome disconnection and has entered into rich and fruitful relationships that reflect the commands of Christ for intimacy with Him and His followers. He "gets it" now and wants everyone else to join him!
Jim is also the author of SO-CALLED CHRISTIAN, and coauthor of the discipleme discipleship workbooks (and soon to be released app) based on the need for disciple leaders to develop connected relationships with disciples rather than simply teaching them lessons.
Jim, his wife Tanya, and their blended family of ten children (only seven still at home!) live in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. They enjoy music, theater, beach trips, great food, entertaining friends and family, and most of all being together!
Table of Contents
Introduction: What Does Disconnected Mean? xi
Chapter 1 How Did He Get This Way? 1
Chapter 2 Disconnection Meets Disaster 10
Chapter 3 How Will He Ever Know? 18
Chapter 4 Getting Sucked into the Vacuum 23
Chapter 5 Walls You Can't See 33
Chapter 6 Disconnected Love 42
Chapter 7 Take Her Heart on a Walk 50
Chapter 8 The Size of Small Things 55
Chapter 9 My Man Won't Read This 66
Chapter 10 If Men Read Only One Chapter 73
Chapter 11 Crawling Toward Connection 83
Chapter 12 Patience Lasts a Long Time 93
Chapter 13 Arm in Arm 100
Chapter 14 Become See-Through 106
Chapter 15 Master the Art 113
About the Author 137
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
This book has been a game changer for me. But it is a good thing that I was reading it with my wife. Per the definition in the book The disconnected man is completely unaware of just how disconnected he is. That describes me to a T. Once the light goes on and you be become aware, that is when everything will begin to change. I highly recommend this book.
I bought 10 copies of this book, and carry 1 with me at all times. Seems I frequently run into someone who needs to read it. This book saved my marriage and, more importantly, my sanity. I've been married to a disconnected man for more than 25 years and thought there was something desperately wrong with me that I was so unloveable. The truths in this book set me free from all the lies I believed about myself. I learned that our dysfunctional relationship was not all my fault, and I learned how to love better - fewer expectations from a man who is/was unable to meet any of my relational needs This powerful little book changed my husband forever. It's taken incredible courage for him to truly see himself and allow himself to connect with people in very scary ways. Thank you, Jim Turner!