The Language of Emotions: What Your Feelings Are Trying to Tell You: Revised and Updated

by Karla McLaren

Overview

Featuring significant updates, the new edition of this beloved book takes readers to the heart of each emotion’s powerful gifts and messages.

Every emotion—even shame, anger, and anxiety—brings us vital information and wisdom. Emotions—especially the unwanted and dishonored ones—hold a tremendous amount of energy. “Too often, we either repress our feelings or let them run wild,” says researcher and educator Karla McLaren. “What many of us were never taught are the fundamental skills for honoring and understanding our profound, powerful emotions.” In this new edition of The Language of Emotions, McLaren takes us much deeper than naming or managing our feelings—she teaches us to listen to the messages within each emotion, reflect on their questions, and incorporate their wisdom into our lives.

Enhanced through more than a decade of research and teaching, this edition offers a time-tested emotional guidebook, including:

• How to safely feel and identify emotions—especially the most intense ones
• Practices for working with feelings—including setting boundaries, grounding, and the healing power of complaining consciously
• Building your empathy—five key skills for awakening your emotional genius
• The role of emotions in the resolution of trauma
• Decoding the unique messages, gifts, and insights carried by each emotion
• New to this edition: insights and practices on anxiety, an exploration of loneliness, and much more

Learning the language of our emotions can deepen our self-understanding, improve our intuition, and enhance our relationships. “Emotions aren’t problems to be solved,” teaches McLaren. “If you learn their language, your emotions can become an indispensable source of vitality, personal growth, and profound healing.”

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781649630438
Publisher:	Sounds True, Incorporated
Publication date:	06/27/2023
Sold by:	Macmillan
Format:	eBook
Pages:	432
Sales rank:	201,829
File size:	713 KB

About the Author

Karla McLaren, M.Ed., is an award-winning author, social science researcher, and empathy innovator. She is CEO of Emotion Dynamics, developer of Dynamic Emotional Integration®, and creator of EmpathyAcademy.org. Karla is the author of Embracing Anxiety, The Dynamic Emotional Integration Workbook, The Art of Empathy, The Power of Emotions at Work, and the multimedia online course Emotional Flow: Becoming Fluent in the Language of Emotions. For more, visit karlamclaren.com.
Karla McLaren, M.Ed., is an award-winning author, social science researcher, and empathy innovator. She is CEO of Emotion Dynamics Inc., developer of Dynamic Emotional Integration®, and creator of EmpathyAcademy.org. Karla is the author of Embracing Anxiety, The Dynamic Emotional Integration Workbook, The Art of Empathy, The Power of Emotions at Work, and the multimedia online course Emotional Flow: Becoming Fluent in the Language of Emotions. For more, visit karlamclaren.com.

Table of Contents

Preface ix

Part I Restoring Your Native Language

1 Introduction 3

Creating a Conscious Life

2 My Empathic Journey 9

The Difficult Beginnings of Empathy

3 Troubled Waters 25

How We Got So Confused

4 It Takes A Village 39

Surrounding Your Emotions with Support

5 Reviving Your Essential Nature 57

Making Room for Your Central Self

6 Avoidance, Addiction, and Awakening 77

Understanding the Need for Distractions

7 Unintentional Shamans 91

The Role of Trauma in Soul-Making and Culture-Building

8 The Role of Emotions in The Resolution of Trauma 113

Water Will Carry You Home

9 The Steadfast Promise 123

Why Love Is Not an Emotion

10 Building Your Raft 125

The Five Empathic Skills

Part II Embracing Your Emotions

11 Wading Into The Water 161

Awakening All of Your Emotions

12 Anger: Protection and Restoration 167

Includes Rage, Fury, and the Healing of Trauma

13 Apathy And Boredom: The Mask for Anger 191

14 Guilt And Shame: Restoring Integrity 197

15 Hatred: The Profound Mirror 215

Includes Resentment, Contempt, Disgust, and Shadow Work

16 Fear: Intuition and Action 235

Includes Anxiety, Worry, and the Healing of Trauma

17 Confusion: The Mask for Fear 257

18 Jealousy And Envy: Relational Radar 263

Includes Greed

19 Panic and Terror: Frozen Fire 281

Includes Healing from Trauma

20 Sadness: Release and Rejuvenation 295

Includes Despair and Despondency

21 Grief: The Deep River of the Soul 311

22 Depression: Ingenious Stagnation 327

Focusing on Situational Depression

23 Suicidal Urges: The Darkness Before Dawn 345

24 Happiness: Amusement and Anticipation 359

25 Contentment: Appreciation and Recognition 365

26 Joy: Affinity and Communion 369

Includes Exhilaration and Honoring Happiness in Others

27 Stress And Resistance 377

Understanding Emotional Physics

28 Emotions Are Your Native Language 387

The Fine Art of a Life Well Lived

Acknowledgments 393

Notes 395

Further Resources 399

Index 405

About The Author 415

Editorial Reviews

Karla McLaren’s revised and updated book, The Language of Emotions, presents a model for understanding emotions and explores the positive aspects of anxiety. Karla uses her lived experience of trauma to inform her readers in ways that may enable them to achieve the emotional understanding necessary to learn from and move beyond their past. There is no doubt that Karla’s passion to help her readers understand emotions, and provide them with useful tools to do so, makes this new edition of her book a gift for those who are suffering from or grappling with what they feel.” —Mary Lamia, PhD, author of Grief Isn’t Something to Get Over and Understanding Myself

“Karla McLaren’s book The Language of Emotions is the first I will recommend to survivors of traumatic and abusive environments and relationships. Karla’s knowledge of how to understand emotions and engage with them in a positive and healing way is an invaluable resource.” —Janja Lalich, PhD, author of Take Back Your Life and Bounded Choice

“Karla McLaren’s unique, empathic view of emotions surprisingly revalues even the most ‘negative’ emotions and opens pathways to understanding the depths of the human soul.” —Michael Meade, author of The World Behind the World and The Water of Life

“This book changed the way I relate to others, and to myself, forever.” —Gavin de Becker, author of The Gift of Fear and Protecting the Gift

From the Publisher