This book is strictly about dimwits, dweezils and dumbbells. In other words, each and every one of us.
The ranks of the mentally challenged are not limited to those with single digit IQ’s or serious education deficiencies. We’ve all said and done spectacularly stupid things — even (or perhaps most especially) college professors, politicians, doctors, scientists, business executives and sports figures.
Brash sportscaster Howard Cosell once suggested that most baseball players were "afflicted with tobacco-chewing mind." This from a man whose own mental faculties sometimes, critics claimed, weren’t worth a bucket of spit.
Sports figures are notorious for making monumental verbal errors. Consider Jerry Coleman, longtime play-by-play commentator for the San Diego Padres, who said,
“There’s a long drive! Winfield is going back, back, back! He hits his head against the wall! It’s rolling to second base.
And: “The pitcher has a blister on the index hand of his pitching finger.”
Of course, sports doesn’t have a monopoly on dimwits, dweezils and dumbbells. Not when politics enters the picture:
One of Dan Quayle’s aides walked up to him in the White House and said, “Mr. Vice-President, the reporters want to know what we’re going to do about the Trade Bill."
Quayle didn’t hesitate a moment. “Tell them that if we owe it, we're going to pay it.”
Dweezildom knows no professional boundaries. Dumbbells are not limited by geography, age, looks, race, creed or sex. Dimwittedness is an equal opportunity affliction. Everybody is stupid, only about different things.
In Manhattan, lovers of moronic mirth say;
Irving is so stupid he has to dip his finger in a glass to see if he has a soft drink!
When he got out of kindergarten he was so excited he could hardly shave.
His elevator doesn’t go to the top floor.
The light’s on, but nobody’s home.
A while back Dumb Blonde Jokes were sweeping the country, mostly gags about women. Over the years there have been legions of jokes poking fun at females who were less than M.l.T. graduates — everyone from women drivers to farmer’s daughters to mothers-in-law.
This time the jokes are on men. To repeat: dumbbellism is sexless.
But if you must be politically correct, by my guest and switch the joke. You’ll soon discover the knife cuts both ways. To paraphrase Casey Stengel, women can be just as stupid as men and vice versa.
Fortunately, there is one good thing about stupidity. You can be fairly sure that it is genuine.
The Official Dumb Dumber Dumbest Joke Book, by Larry Wilde. The latest e-book release in The Larry Wilde Joke Book Series by Laugh.com!
This collection of anecdotes, one-liners, stories, jokes and quips is for people who just aren’t all there. Not passively but passionately, fervently, fiercely. We're talking red-hot, true blue, totally committed, hard-core, fiery stupids!
Collected and compiled by Larry Wilde, author of over 50 joke books that have sold more than twelve million copies. See why The New York Times has dubbed him; “America’s Best Selling Humorist”.
THE OFFICIAL DUMB DUMBER DUMBEST JOKE BOOK – Guaranteed to make you laugh!
