What if I Say the Wrong Thing?: 25 Habits for Culturally Effective People

by Verna A. Myers

Overview

Develop the Habits of Culturally Effective People—One Practical Tip at a Time 

This easy-to-use handbook is your go-to guide for navigating real-world diversity and inclusion challenges with confidence. Whether you're an individual seeking to grow your cultural competence or an organization aiming to foster inclusive habits across your team, this book delivers practical, actionable advice. 

With quick tips, follow-up actions, and reflection prompts, you'll be better prepared for the unexpected moments that often arise in diverse workplaces and communities. Think of this book as your personal DEI manual—helping you practice now so you're ready when it counts. 

This guide includes: 

• Actionable habits for everyday inclusion. Learn how to respond thoughtfully and effectively to a variety of diversity-related situations.
• Quick reference format. Keep it in your bag or on your desk—perfect for on-the-spot guidance or group discussions.
• Real-world relevance. Addresses situations you’re likely to encounter in professional and social environments.
• Ideal for individuals and teams. Great for staff training, onboarding, or company-wide diversity initiatives.
• Follow-up prompts included. Encourage reflection and next steps to build lasting, inclusive habits.
• Great for gifting. A valuable resource for HR teams, educators, managers, and anyone committed to cultural competence. 

Equip yourself—and your organization—with the tools to move diversity forward through preparation, practice, and purpose. 

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781614389712
Publisher:	American Bar Association
Publication date:	04/07/2014
Pages:	125
Product dimensions:	6.40(w) x 6.20(h) x 0.60(d)

About the Author

Vernā Myers, Esq., principal of Vernā Myers Consulting Group, LLC (VMCG), is an internationally recognized expert on diversity and inclusion within law firms, law departments and law schools. Verna is a dynamic speaker and creative advisor in support of creating inclusive environments and improving the recruitment, retention of underrepresented groups. Ms. Myers is well known for her expansive approach to diversity and her belief that inclusion is necessary for people from different cultures, ethnicities, genders, generations, physical abilities, races, sexual orientations, experiences and backgrounds to thrive in their organizations. 

VMCG has collaborated with over 100 legal clients to effect sustainable organizational change by conducting cultural assessments, developing comprehensive strategic diversity action plans informed by her knowledge of cross-cultural competencies, and facilitating compelling and interactive workshops in the U.S. and around the globe. A highly sought after speaker at numerous conferences worldwide, Vernā sponsors the highly successful annual Opus Conference on Race and Ethnicity in Large Law Firms, and frequently is the keynote speaker at bar and legal association meetings, law firm partner and leadership retreats, women’s conferences, and affinity group forums. 

Vernā is the author of Moving Diversity Forward: How To Go From Well-Meaning To Well-Doing published by the American Bar Association in 2011. Her second book, What If I Say the Wrong Thing?: Learning the Language of Inclusion was published in 2014. 

Table of Contents

https://www.americanbar.org/content/dam/aba-cms-dotorg/products/inv/book/411452537/toc-5370248.pdf

Editorial Reviews

In a very clever, relatable and user-friendly fashion, she’s put her finger on the things that many of us struggle with as we balance our desire to be inclusive while embracing and honoring our differences. Her 25 habits are pearls of wisdom, packaged in personal stories to which we can all relate.” —Linda K. Myers, P.C., Partner, Kirkland & Ellis LLP 

 

“True cultural effectiveness grows not out of cognitive brightness, but rather "emotional, social, and spiritual intelligence." Verna makes clear that these qualities have the greatest chance for being developed when we humble ourselves by admitting what we don’t know. One of the most compelling themes in the book is the simple, yet profound idea that enhancing opportunities for inclusion not only requires modification of our office cultures, but we are frequently challenged to also change ourselves. A truly wonderful book!” —James K. Grasty, vice president & assistant general counsel, Office of General Counsel, Merck & Co., Inc. 

 

“I love the format of the book; it acknowledges implicitly that bad and old habits are hard to break and require alternative behaviors to practice in order to form new ones. I was delighted by the simple yet actionable new behaviors and responses offered for controversial habits. Practitioners will benefit greatly from the wisdom of this guide!” —Pamela Culpepper, senior vice president global chief diversity and inclusion officer, PepsiCo, Inc. 

 

“[O]ne of the most useful books I have read on how to combat the tensions that inherently occur in a diverse global workplace. . .with concrete tips for individuals and organizations on how to handle varied situations that frequently occur in the workplace and in our personal lives.” —Theodore J. Boutrous, Jr., partner & member of executive and management committees, Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher LLP

From the Publisher

True cultural effectiveness grows not out of cognitive brightness, but rather "emotional, social, and spiritual intelligence." Verna makes clear that these qualities have the greatest chance for being developed when we humble ourselves by admitting what we don’t know. One of the most compelling themes in the book is the simple, yet profound idea that enhancing opportunities for inclusion not only requires modification of our office cultures, but we are frequently challenged to also change ourselves. A truly wonderful book!

James K. Grasty

I love the format of the book; it acknowledges implicitly that bad and old habits are hard to break and require alternative behaviors to practice in order to form new ones. I was delighted by the simple yet actionable new behaviors and responses offered for controversial habits. Practitioners will benefit greatly from the wisdom of this guide!

Pamela Culpepper

In a very clever, relatable and user-friendly fashion, she’s put her finger on the things that many of us struggle with as we balance our desire to be inclusive while embracing and honoring our differences. Her 25 habits are pearls of wisdom, packaged in personal stories to which we can all relate.

Linda K. Myers

[O]ne of the most useful books I have read on how to combat the tensions that inherently occur in a diverse global workplace. . .with concrete tips for individuals and organizations on how to handle varied situations that frequently occur in the workplace and in our personal lives.

Theodore J. Boutrous