When She Makes More: 10 Rules for Breadwinning Women

When She Makes More: 10 Rules for Breadwinning Women

by Farnoosh Torabi


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How to thrive in a relationship when you’re the richer half

For the top-earning woman, the rules are different. She faces a much higher risk for burnout, infidelity, and divorce. In this highly practical book, financial guru and media star Farnoosh Torabi—a breadwinner herself—presents a bold strategy that not only addresses how income imbalances affect relationships and family dynamics, but also how a woman can best manage (and take advantage of) this unique circumstance—emotionally, socially, and financially.

Among the rules:
• Rewrite the Fairy Tale: Come to grips with the new landscape for dating, marriage, and ever after.
• Find Your Favorite Position: Stay on top of the finances while allowing your partner to lead.
• Don’t Settle for a Mr. Mom: The math may conclude it’s best for him to quit his job to become the primary caregiver, but there's far more to consider.
• Don’t Make His Life Too Easy: How outsourcing and paying for help can backfire.

With eye-opening stories and a survey of one thousand people, this book will appeal to fans of The End of Men and The Richer Sex. Torabi helps us embrace this new reality and make it work.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781594632167
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date: 05/01/2014
Pages: 272
Sales rank: 1,297,320
Product dimensions: 6.30(w) x 9.10(h) x 1.40(d)
Age Range: 18 Years

About the Author

Farnoosh Torabi is a personal finance expert, speaker and TV personality. Her work and advice has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Entrepreneur, Time and Money magazines. Her television credits include The Today Show, ABC, CNN, Live! With Kelly and Michael, Dr .Oz and The View. She hosted the Webby-nominated show Financially Fit on Yahoo!, the #1 personal finance series on the web. She and her husband live in Brooklyn. Learn more about Farnoosh at Farnoosh.TV.

Read an Excerpt

This dramatic economic shift can lead to guilt, shame, and questions of identity for both sexes. Money is already a bone of contention for most people; when she makes more, however, the plot thickens.

Table of Contents

Introduction Money and Margaritas ix

Chapter 1 Rule #1: Face the Facts 1

Chapter 2 Rule #2: Rewrite the Fairy Tale 23

Chapter 3 Rule #3: Level the Financial Playing Field 55

Chapter 4 Rule #4: Hack the Hypotheticals 81

Chapter 5 Rule #5: Cater to the Male Brain 99

Chapter 6 Rule #6: Buy Yourself a Wife (and Other Tips to Avoid Domestic Drudgery) 119

Chapter 7 Rule #7: Break the Glass Ceiling but Carry a Shield 143

Chapter 8 Rule #8: Plan Parenthood… from Conception to College and Beyond 169

Chapter 9 Rule #9: Grow a Thicker Skin 203

Chapter 10 Rule #10: Remember to Breathe 215

Acknowledgments 227

Notes 231

What People are Saying About This

From the Publisher

“In When She Makes More, Farnoosh Torabi unmasks the challenges female breadwinners face and provides solid solutions for protecting your finances and your relationship.”
—Tory Johnson, Good Morning America contributor and New York Times #1 bestselling author of The Shift
“When She Makes More is an inspiring, optimistic book that equips today's female breadwinners with smart solutions for overcoming the personal and professional trip wires of our new economic reality.”
—Barbara Corcoran, author of Shark Tales and host of The Millionaire Broker with Barbara Corcoran on CNBC
“I predict Farnoosh’s ground breaking book will save more relationships than couples counseling ever could.  Superbly researched, well-written, engagingly fun, I couldn’t put it down.  Every working woman, married or single, needs to read this empowering guide! I’m so grateful I did.”
—Barbara Stanny, author of Secrets of Six-Figure Women
When She Makes More is a book of liberation from old ideas about women in the workforce who want to have it all. Torabi’s intelligence, respect for research, and vibrant prose put the book in an elite class with the best self-help books from financial gurus and masters of psychological nonfiction.”
—Amanda Steinberg, founder of DailyWorth.com

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When She Makes More: 10 Rules for Breadwinning Women 4.3 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 10 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Women who think like this should remain single...or look for one of the modern day wimps they (not me) call men
Beverly_Harzog More than 1 year ago
This is an exceptionally well-researched book by an expert who knows what she's talking about. Torabi tackles an important topic that doesn't get enough attention. I found the book both inspiring and empowering. I highly recommend it! 
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book was written to help younger women who are primary breadwinners to navigate sensitive financial issues within their relationships. Many people may not think that the issue is a concern (depending on their background, age, position, and relationships) but I have seen others struggle with issues that Farnoosh explores.  Drawing on statistics, extensive research, real-life examples, and advice from psychiatrists, financial planners, and even a divorce lawyer, Farnoosh discusses rules for happiness in marriage and relationships relating to money. She does a great job of identifying key issues that should be discussed and decided upon throughout various life stages. She adds her own experiences to the discussions but doesn't offer one-size-fits-all solutions. She wisely advises readers to make decisions based on their unique circumstances.  You don't have to agree with every stance or perspective to get tremendous value from the book. If money affects your relationships (and it generally does in both obvious and not-so-obvious ways), then you should consider reading When She Makes More.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Guys, this is a terrific insight into the growing group of bread-winning women around the country. As a 30-something in NYC, I've dated many women who make more than me, and I wish I read this book beforehand. It's important to realize the realities of these relationships, and Farnoosh spells out her advice based on personal experience and other couples' stories. Great book! I'm recommending this to all of my buddies :)
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Nords More than 1 year ago
Guys, read this book to figure it out now! Farnoosh's advice immediately struck a chord with me because I'm one of those men who earned less. My spouse and I have enjoyed nearly 28 years of marriage while figuring out our own roles-- and dealing with the scrutiny of family & friends. My spouse and I kept ourselves focused on the real goal of financial independence, and the book's practical money-management techniques really work. Guys, don't worry: this is not a male-bashing polemic. There's no psychobabble. You'll learn how two genders will see the same situations in very different ways, and you'll know how to respond to those differences. The book is based on hundreds of interviews with couples and counselors, and they've figured out how to deal with the inevitable debates to keep it all together. Our emotions and reflex responses may try to hijack our brains, but you'll learn how to get back on track instead of reacting. 10 easy (and very entertaining) chapters will show you how to level up your communications skills and share your couple's responsibilities. It's not about who earns more, but rather how each of you contribute to the relationship. You'll also learn how to handle the critical commentary of your family (particularly mothers-in-law) and the rest of society. It's a great read, and my spouse and I kept nodding our heads in recognition. Our daughter is got her copy as a bonus college graduation gift.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Interesting read from a very practical money expert. Farnoosh tackles a tricky subject, who makes more money in a couple and how that can impact your relationship. Lots of good takeaway information here, would highly recommend this book to any woman to read.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Book is very anedotal, based on opinons, it quickly lost my interest. Based on the title, I was expecting something more factual.