Watching a villainous Benedict Cumberbatch stalk around the Enterprise in Star Trek Into Darkness made me happy, and watching him go head to head with Chris Pine’s hotheaded Captain Kirk made me happier. But you know what would make me happiest? Seeing Cumberbatch’s Sherlock face off against Spock, in a battle of coldblooded logic! Admit it: you’ve dreamed about it, too. Here are a few more dream character crossovers:
Joffrey Baratheon (Game of Thrones/A Song of Ice and Fire) in Lord of the Flies. Just picture it: a plane crashes on an island, killing all adults aboard. The only survivors? A ragtag crew of evacuating British schoolboys…and Joffrey Baratheon. “I’m the king! Give me the conch and do what I say! I’M THE KING,” he’d squeal, before being used as bait to catch a wild boar for dinner. Joffrey would die faster than Piggy.
Harriet the Spy in Pride and Prejudice. The Bennet sisters could use a fearless little spy on their side when it comes to expediting their slow-motion romances. “This is Harriet, our prosperous cousin from, er, the…hill country. Yes, the hill country!” they’d say, before sending Harriet and her spy notebook off to trail Bingley’s nasty sisters, and of course the nefarious Wickham. Harriet could help them shave months off their courtship times with her dispatches from behind enemy lines. And perhaps her detailed accounting of Wickham’s slovenly, gambling ways would put Lydia off the whole elopement thing altogether. Though we’re not counting on it.
Daisy Buchanan (The Great Gatsby) in Little House on the Prairie. We want to see a disheveled Daisy try to keep her silks from wilting while she’s mucking out a pigsty. Jazz-age lit’s most arrogant sweetheart will learn humility fast when the most fun to be had within 50 miles is found in a button string. “What’s so great about a button string?” she’ll ask Laura. “It’s a string. With buttons on it,” Laura will respond incredulously, unimpressed by the glittery interloper who screams every time she catches a glimpse of the headcheese.
Ron Swanson (Parks & Recreation) in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Holly Golightly will try her usual manic pixie dream girl act on Swanson, who will remain unmoved. “Look at your life,” he’ll say, cutting into a large porterhouse at the fancy New York restaurant Holly’s camped out at, waiting to meet an eligible man. “Look at your choices. And look at the marbling on this fine piece of steak. Now leave me alone, you bore me.”
Buffy the Vampire Slayer in Twilight. Heh.
What’s your dream character crossover?