The Rules of Book Nerd Friendship

Dear Literary Lady,
What are the rules of book nerd friendship?
–R.A., Middletown, NJ
Dear R.A.,
Playwright Noel Coward famously wrote his “Rules of Palship” with best friend actress Esme Wynne in 1915, when they were just 14 years old. According to Lists of Note, the rules were written to help weather the storms throughout a deep but tumultuous friendship. Even as teenagers, Coward and Wynne knew even the best of friends may not always see eye to eye, but with careful planning and forethought, those disagreements should not break their bond.
It is with Coward’s rules in mind that I present “The Rules of Book Nerd Friendship”:
1) Neither shall ever pass judgement on the other for literary tastes, choice of reading material, reading habits, depth of literary experience, and reading ability.
2) Each shall have first dibs on the other’s book after they’ve finished reading them.
3) Each shall take as long as they like to read each other’s books.
4) Each shall live by the Spanish motto, mi book collection es su book collection.
5) Neither shall ever write in each other’s books, except when inscribing a page of the book as a gift to the other.
6) Each must always tell the other of the latest and greatest novel recently encountered, and neither shall keep a worthy novel a secret from the other.
7) Let no words of anger, spite, or passive aggression be uttered when hotly debating the merits of a book or an author.
8) Credit must always be given where due. If one recommends a book to the other, the recommendee must always give credit to the recommender whenever the book is mentioned.
9) If each one happens upon a first edition of the other’s favorite book, they must immediately call, text, email, shout with elation, or otherwise notify the other so that the book may be expeditiously acquired.
10) Each will wait in line with the other to meet an author or get a book signed.
11) Before any books are donated, each must make an offering of it to the other.
12) Each must speak with honesty when reviewing a book to the other—the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, no spoilers.
13) Again, there shall be no spoilers.
14) Each shall always remember their love for their friend outweighs their love for any book, even if their friend unreasonably thinks a particularly magnificent book was “just okay.”
Live by these rules and you’ll easily overcome any differences you and your BFF (Booknerd Friend Forever) may have in your reading life!
Love and paperbacks,
Literary Lady