Mothers and Sons: A Guest Post by Andromeda Romano-Lax
After the death of two teenagers, guidance counselor Abby finds her son at the center of a murder investigation in this thriller that tackles toxic masculinity and generational trauma. Read on for an exclusive essay from Andromeda Romano-Lax on writing What Boys Learn.
Hardcover
$26.95
$29.95
What Boys Learn
What Boys Learn
In Stock Online
Hardcover
$26.95
$29.95
A twisty, jaw-dropping psychological thriller that unravels a mother’s worst nightmare—that her child is capable of terrible violence—when her teenage son becomes a suspect in the murder of two classmates, from the author of The Deepest Lake.
A twisty, jaw-dropping psychological thriller that unravels a mother’s worst nightmare—that her child is capable of terrible violence—when her teenage son becomes a suspect in the murder of two classmates, from the author of The Deepest Lake.
My last novel, THE DEEPEST LAKE, was about a mother whose 23-year-old daughter has disappeared while visiting Lake Atitlan, Guatemala. That novel was about a mother’s worst nightmare—if she is the mother of a daughter, that is. But what about the mother of a son?
Unfortunately, the first thing that comes to mind isn’t young man as victim, it’s young man as potential perpetrator. My friends with sons agree: even though we know boys are also the victims of violence, we worry most about our teenage boys doing something wrong to others, whether out of malice, recklessness, or simple immaturity. We worry, furthermore, that society gives boys damaging ideas about what is permissible.
In WHAT BOYS LEARN, Abby Rosso, a high school counselor, has reason to fear that her 16-year-old son Benjamin was involved in the deaths of two female classmates. At the very least, he knows things he’s not telling.
Much as Abby doesn’t want to believe Benjamin could do anything terrible, she also recognizes signs of problematic behavior. She should. Her own brother Owen is in prison for crimes he committed when he was just a little older than Benjamin.
I am the mother of two grown children. I’ve never found something that makes me think my kid could have committed a crime. I’ve never had a child interrogated by police.
But what I have experienced—what every parent has experienced—are those moments when you can’t possibly know what is going through your teenager’s head. Talk to them, experts may say, but we also know that teenagers won’t always talk.
Through Abby, I also explored how a mom’s own experiences may color what she is noticing and feeling. Abby has troubling memories from her own adolescence that confirm the violent things that boys and men sometimes do.
Abby isn’t the perfect role model. Few of us are. And yet, we must do our best, day after day, with the hope—a valid, evidence-based hope!—that most teens will make it through their rocky teen years without causing irrevocable harm to themselves or others.
Parenting is hard, and the burdens put on mothers’ shoulders can be overwhelming. The truth is, most teenagers can be unpredictable and unknowable at times. Is a child’s refusal to talk or sudden temper flare-up a red flag or just part of growing up? I enjoyed exploring that question in a way that I hope will validate other parents’ entirely valid concerns.
What Boys Learn is a twisty thriller with several mysteries at its heart. Writing it, I didn’t pull back from exploring some dark corners of the human mind. But alongside the darkness, there is light. As the novel progresses, we do find out what Benjamin has been thinking and feeling, and we do find assurance that mothers and sons can become closer in the face of adversity. Despite parenting anxieties, we can still love our children, even the challenging ones.