Bigger Than Myself: A Guest Post by Demi-Leigh Tebow
We’ve all arrived at points in our life where we wonder “What now? What next? Is this it?” Demi-Leigh Tebow has been there too. In her debut book, A Crown That Lasts, she shares the joy of finding a greater purpose in loving God and others. Here is the exclusive inside look at Demi’s thoughts and feelings on the night she relinquished her Miss Universe crown and found inspiration for this book and her own life . . .
Hardcover $29.99
A Crown that Lasts: You Are Not Your Label
A Crown that Lasts: You Are Not Your Label
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Hardcover $29.99
Identity is so much more than title and badge, and Demi-Leigh Tebow is here to help you find your way to a better connection with God via shedding earthly advancement.
Identity is so much more than title and badge, and Demi-Leigh Tebow is here to help you find your way to a better connection with God via shedding earthly advancement.
There in Muang Thong Thani, Thailand, the whole city was buzzing with excitement for the night’s event. The backstage lights were dim and voices were low, as we listened to the muffled sounds of thousands of Miss Universe 2018 attendees in the arena. I stood backstage feeling a mixture of emotions. Careful not to mess up my hair or dress before the big moment, Tim gave me a hug. He had flown 18 hours, amidst a busy season and cut a special family trip short, to support me as I passed my crown to the rightful next Miss Universe. Women in beautiful gowns began rushing to the stage and the producer, all in black, was signaling us. It was my cue to join the other women on stage. This was it, my last walk as the reigning Miss Universe.
With my heart racing, I stood on the stage with the crown in hand. I looked at it one last time as the memories from the past year began flooding my mind. Wearing the crown was a physical symbol of the success I’d achieved. Wearing the crown gave me pride and purpose because I took the title seriously, and wanted to use my reign to make an impact and make my country proud. It had been a whirlwind, an incredible whirlwind, but all good things come to an end right? The lights were flashing, the dresses were sparkling, and the two remaining women stood on stage awaiting the announcement. With anticipation so intense you could practically feel it, Steve Harvey said the words, “And the new Miss Universe IS….Philippines!” The crowd went wild and it was my turn to present the new, very deserving Miss Universe with the crown. I knew it would be a bittersweet moment, giving the crown back, but I didn’t realize how difficult it would be. You see, what I thought would be the end of a whirlwind year, bringing new opportunities on the heels of it, ended up being the tipping point for my identity crisis.
After crowning the next worthy winner, I stepped quietly off-stage. The team of people who had been with me every day during my reign quickly descended upon the new Miss Universe, and I was alone. I’m so thankful that Tim was there or I wouldn’t have even had a ride back to my hotel! I had been so focused on achieving the title, I didn’t really think about how my life would change when my dream job ended. Filled with confusion and grieving the loss of the title, I was left asking myself, “Now what?”
My now husband, Tim, witnessed it all. He watched my last walk down the runway as the reigning Miss Universe, he saw the moment I handed over the crown, and he saw the team he had come to know as an extension of me, flock to the new Miss Universe leaving me alone with my bags. He told me later that he could see it almost instantly on my face – the loss, the confusion, the disappointment. And while he did everything in his power to cheer me up or take my mind off it all, I had to face those feelings on my own.
I was really surprised by how lost I felt. I had so much support, so many people mentoring me, and coaching me every step of the way leading up to winning Miss South Africa and then Miss Universe. But, not one person warned me about this – nobody tells you what to do once you’ve accomplished that life-long dream, made the team, got the promotion or corner office. If confidence is gained only once you’ve finally achieved that title or next accomplishment, then what happens to one’s confidence when it gets taken away?
It was a harsh lesson for me to learn: I had rooted a big part of my identity in something temporary. I had quite literally placed my identity in a crown that would not last. This pivotal moment was the catalyst for writing my new book, A Crown That Lasts.
A Crown That Lasts is my roadmap to discovering and embracing the woman God created me to be. My journey began by digging up the tangled roots of my identity and uprooting the weeds of doubt and insecurity that took root when I placed my worth in my achievements and earthly accolades. I did the hard work myself to heal from past trauma, break old habits, and ultimately learn how to root my identity in something fixed, never changing, always trustworthy, and bigger than myself… my Creator. While I don’t feel worthy of sharing this message with other women, I do feel called. My hope is that my readers see a little piece of themselves in each chapter, and they will use the book to do the work in their own lives too. My prayer is that each reader will dig into their own identity, uproot any beliefs of doubts or insecurity, and not just understand but truly believe how worthy and valuable they are, living out the unique purpose God has for their lives.