Here’s Who Should Play the Baudelaires, the Snickets, and Count Olaf in Netflix’s A Series of Unfortunate Events

This week, one of the best book series of all time received extremely fortunate news: A Series of Unfortunate Events, by Lemony Snicket, is getting a second chance at becoming a great live-action adaptation, this time in the form of a Netflix original series. There’s no word on casting for the show yet, but why should that stop us? Here’s a dream cast list—a phrase that here means: NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN—for the new Series of Unfortunate Events series!

Anna Kendrick as Violet Baudelaire
Yes, she’s 29, and the character is supposed to be 14, but Kendrick has been killing it playing smarty-pants girls of all sorts of ages since Rocket Science. Casting actual children as children is tough, but Olivia Newton-John was 27 in Grease and Stockard Channing was 33, and they were supposed to be in HIGH SCHOOL! Kendrick has the right attitude for Violet, and if the new Magicians TV show can’t have her as Julia, then Netflix’s Snicket should get her as Violet.

Owen Best as Klaus Baudelaire
You may not remember this guy, but he played the young Sam Flynn in Tron:Legacy back in 2010, and he also shows up in the Diary of a Wimpy Kid movie. Put some glasses on him, and I say you’ve found yourself the book-loving Klaus.

A baby as Sunny Baudelaire
Will have to be a baby. Maybe a baby that is computer-generated. How Netflix will figure out that time when she sword fights with her two teeth is a mystery.

Owen Wilson as Lemony Snicket
He’s the narrator and “author” of the entire series, trailing just behind the Baudelaire orphans and telling their story. He once had a thing with their mother, and he’s part of a secret organization that may or may not be out to stop fires. In the last film adaptation, Snicket was voiced by Jude Law, which, while fine, was probably a mistake. A comedic, offbeat, and original voice might be ideal here, and if Snicket is ever seen in this version, it may as well be Owen Wilson.

Luke Wilson as Jacques Snicket
In later books, both of Lemony’s siblings appear as active participants in the story, as opposed to the narrator’s more phantomish presence. If we’ve got Owen Wilson as Lemony, why not his real-life brother Luke Wilson as Jacques? I’m not saying they should get Wes Anderson to direct A Series of Unfortunate Events, but someone should probably at least think about it. (Or at the very least try to rip off Wes Anderson’s style.)

Tina Fey as Kit Snicket
Kit Snicket’s backstory is slowly, slowly unfolding in the newest series of Lemony Snicket books—All the Wrong Questions—but in A Series of Unfortunate Events, she’s a grown woman who heroically aids the Baudelaires in later books. As with a lot of these characters, a comedic presence makes sense to match the tone of the prose. Fey has already played a character with “Lemon” in her name, so it’s just a hop-skip-and-a Snicket over to Kit.

Adam Driver as Count Olaf
Yeah, right, like Adam Driver is going to have time for this! But imagine how great he would be if he somehow did. The idea of Driver playing the scheming nemesis of the Baudelaires (and the Snickets, and the V.F.D.) might seem a little nuts because he’s too young, but there’s something about the modulation of his voice that seems both threatening and hilarious at the same time. In the original film adaptation, Jim Carrey’s performance is okay, and he certainly looks like the excellent Brett Helquist illustrations from the original books, but for this iteration, maybe something a little stranger is needed. Plus, Driver’s got the eyebrows.

(OR Peter Capaldi!)
Speaking of eyebrows, and already kind of looking the part, and being age-appropriate, current Doctor Who incumbent Peter Capaldi would make a perfect Count Olaf. Too bad we’ve gotten used to him being such a good guy lately…
Who would you cast in the new Lemony Snicket series? Which other characters are you excited to see?