7 Reasons Why Olivia is My Pig of Choice

Oliva the Spy
She maintains equanimity in difficult situations. Olivia overhears part of a conversation about taking her to an institution (the ballet, in this case) and worries about what kind of place that might be. She knows her mother has been complaining about some messy and frustrating situations lately. Will the “special place” her mother tells her she’s going to be a prison? Olivia is nervous, but dresses and packs stoically as she awaits her fate.

Olivia
She’s a great negotiator. Mommy pig says it’s bedtime, and Olivia begins the offering with “only five books tonight, Mommy.” No stranger to the game, Mommy counters with one. Olivia returns with the expected four, and mom replies, “two.” And, of course, they settle on three, “but that’s it!” I get the feeling the actual count didn’t match up and Olivia ended up with Callas being the fifth book after all.

Olivia and the Missing Toy
She’s has her own sense of style. When it’s time for soccer, Olivia declines to wear the “really unattractive green” uniform, opting instead to ask her mother to make one in red.
“But then you’ll look different from everyone else on the team,” explains her mother.
“That’s the point.”
Olivia will try on every outfit in her wardrobe before going anywhere and always has to wear the perfectly matching red sock among all her other nearly-identical red socks. (Go, Red Sox!)

Olivia Saves the Circus
She has an understated flair for the dramatic. “One day my mother took Ian and me to the circus… but when we got there, all the circus people were out sick with ear infections. Luckily I knew how to do everything,” she states, before launching into the “pretty all true” description of performing every role from juggling, to being the tattooed lady, to walking on stilts, to being the “flying Olivia”, and working with trained dogs that were not very well trained. She tells it all, to the best of her recollection, with minimal hamming it up, as it were.

Olivia and the Fairy Princess
She is a fearless individual.  Puzzled by why all the other girls (and some of the boys) insist on taking every opportunity to dress as princesses, Olivia feels she is suffering an identity crisis. She bemoans the lack of diversity among her friends’ princess choices, “Why is it always a pink princess? Why not an Indian princess or a princess from Thailand or an African princess or a princess from China? There are alternatives.” At parties, at ballet, at Halloween: it’s all princesses all the time. “Why do they all want to be the same?” a red-striped, towel-trussed Olivia challenges her mother. Olivia, I have never empathized with you more.

Olivia Forms a Band
She is resourceful. When Olivia learns there will be no musical accompaniment to the evening’s fireworks show, she immediately responds that she will supply the audio portion of the entertainment herself. Her mother attempts to dissuade her, “because the word ‘band’ means more than one person, and a band sounds like more than one person.” Without missing a beat Olivia replies, “this morning you told me I sounded like five people!” Indeed.

Olivia Goes to Venice
She is exceptionally felicitous. Despite nearly sinking a gondola and almost certainly destroying treasured national architecture without a glance backward, Olivia always knows what every occasion calls for, especially when visiting Venice. And what does that turn out to be? Why, consuming yet another gelato, of course!