Be Ready When the Shit Goes Down: A Survival Guide to the Apocalypse

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More About This Book

Overview

The end of the world is coming. Are you going to be ready when the sh*t goes down? Here's a quick checklist:

  1. Have you dug up your wife's rose garden and built a fallout shelter, equipped with a prison where you can lock up annoying family members?
  2. Have you mapped out an escape route to your safe zone?
  3. Is there a vehicle of death sitting in your garage?
  4. Have you filled your go bag with all the needed instruments, including waterproof matches, postapocalyptic goggles, and at least one sexual party favor?
  5. Have you learned how to milk various types of animals, including a giraffe?

You need this book more than you even know. Without it, you're roadkill. Lucky for you, Forrest Griffin is the perfect apocalyptic chaperone. From spotting the signs of the global downfall to alienating your loved ones now so they don't come looking for you after, to hot-wiring a car to starting a religion in your own image, Griffin provides you with all the hot knowledge you need to survive the downfall of civilization. Simply put, this is the most important book about the apocalypse that you will ever read by a UFC fighter from Georgia.

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780061998263
  • Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
  • Publication date: 8/9/2011
  • Pages: 272
  • Sales rank: 108,581
  • Product dimensions: 8.76 (w) x 6.10 (h) x 0.76 (d)

Meet the Author

Forrest Griffin

Forrest Griffin is one of the top-ranked light-heavyweight mixed martial artists in the world. He won the first season of The Ultimate Fighter in 2005 and has been one of the most beloved UFC fighters ever since. He is the day man, fighter of the night man, and champion of the sun. He is also a master of karate and friendship for everyone. But calm down, ladies, Forrest and his main squeeze, Jaime, live in Las Vegas.

Erich Krauss is a professional Muay Thai fighter and the author of more than twenty-five books, including Anderson Silva's The Mixed Martial Arts Instruction Manual: Striking. He has written for the New York Times, and is the founder and publisher of Victory Belt Publishing. He lives in Las Vegas.

Table of Contents

Parental Warning ix

Acknowledgments xi

Forrest, What the Fuck Are You Thinking? xvii

You MUST Pass This Test ... This Time I Mean It! 1

1 Prepare now, Part I: How to be Ted Kaczynski without all that Unabomber Crap 27

2 Prepare now, Part II: Don't Forget to Pack your Toothbrush 71

3 How Shit will go Down 83

4 Surviving the Initial Shit Storm 129

5 No, you can't Invite your Friends-they will Trash our Utopia 192

Epilogue 236

Appendix 241

Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 39 Customer Reviews

  • Posted September 5, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    Full of knowledge..and stuff

    To say this book was written by someone with a rudimentary style is an understatement, that's what makes it so great. Forrest Griffin is a fighter with a single purpose, stay alive as long as you can. Whether that's in the Octagon or during the Apocalypse, this book is filled with useful tips (well most of them) on how to do just that.

    Though I'm sure some actual research went into making this novel, much of it seems borrowed from other sources such as FBI undercover agents or special forces. If you've gone camping, you may already know the basics on how to survive in the wild, but Forrest offers up details on how to survive like Mad Max instead of the usual. Between packing a "go bag", to building a fallout shelter, and finally how to equip your "Vehicle of Death" (insert mini gun here) you learn all the necessities of post-apocalyptic life.

    The section on castle building and cult creation were a riot, as were his definitions on cleanliness and lack of coffee. Although Forrest provides examples on how the Apocalypse might be brought about (nuclear war, virus, meteor, Ragnarok), he never pins down his own thoughts on how or why, just merely examples and explanations. I now have a healthy fear of squirrel pox because of this section.

    Overall, this book offers up some hilarious insights into the traumatic end of the world scenario we've seen in countless Hollywood blockbusters. One thing I know for sure, if the Apocalypse does hit, I hope like hell I can find my nook to reference this offbeat survival guide.

    2 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted September 10, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    Hilarious.....no honestly!

    First, just look at that cover! how can you not peek inside the mind of a man that thinks of a book and cover like that? look at that marmut. really this book has made me laugh out loud almost every page, and i usually dont while reading. Forrest.....you scare me sir...but damn youre entertaining.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted May 20, 2012

    Start to finish

    This book is amazing I have Both of forests books and there great he Even went as far as to hide funny comments I'm the copyright section this book is the definition of front to back read

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