2024-10-01
A successful entrepreneur discusses how to break free of feeling boxed in.
Real estate entrepreneur Pepine writes that she underwent a period of self-discovery in her late 40s when she realized that she no longer wanted to be contained in the “boxes” in which she’d lived. According to the author, three different types of “boxes” exist: physical boxes that evoke strong feelings, such as gift boxes or a ballot box; metaphorical boxes, as in “Think outside the box” or “on our soapbox”; and the boxes that other people’s expectations evoke (“Why am I trying so hard to squeeze myself into a box not built for me or by me?”). Each chapter recounts an experience of Pepine or someone else existing in a “box” and the ways in which they broke free. Some moments are relatively minor, as when she became aware of the box that her male friend was in when he commented that he bought women’s running shoes because they were more colorful but that he drew the line at pink soles. Other moments convey major life shifts, as when the author made sure her daughter, who recently came out as gay, felt supported by family, including Pepine’s mother: “It has been beautiful to watch the transformation of my mother’s hard stance toward people in a box different from her own and how she has embraced and loved my daughter in the box she is in.” This warm, articulate book drives home the need to be constantly aware of which norms one’s boxes are encouraging. Pepine remains brutally honest throughout, whether she’s sharing painful moments, such as the discovery of a boyfriend’s sexual addiction, or an account of when she clapped back at a middle-aged white man who complained that he was the “least protected class in America today.” Although some readers won’t connect to every story (as when Pepine tells of spending $10,000 to attend a networking conference, and of working with a woman who claimed to “channel books”), the majority are refreshingly relatable.
An invigoratingly honest and inspiring examination of the labels and limits that people put on themselves.