Dear White Women: Let's Get (Un)comfortable Talking about Racism

by Sara Blanchard, Misasha Suzuki Graham, Terri E. Givens (Foreword by)

Overview

A practical, compassionate guide to understanding and dismantling racism, Dear White Women helps readers move beyond awareness and into action—at home, at work, and in their communities. Written by two multiracial moms and Harvard grads, this accessible book is a perfect starting point for anyone ready to engage in honest, lasting conversations about race.

"This gentle but firm guide will appeal to readers interested in putting the concept of anti-racism into action." —Publishers Weekly

Whether you're a parent seeking to raise anti-racist children, a professional undergoing anti-racism training, or a friend hoping to better understand the lived experiences of people of color, this guide offers historical context, personal storytelling, and actionable tools that inspire change.

Why Readers Recommend It:

• Structured for Impact: The "Listen, Learn, Act" format makes complex ideas digestible and puts anti-racist principles into real-world practice.

• Grounded in History and Policy: Offers a broad yet approachable overview of U.S. race relations, from past to present.

• Inclusive Perspectives: Draws from the authors' own multiracial families, plus a range of voices and lived experiences.

• Tools for Change: Great for individual reflection, family discussions, or use in schools, businesses, or book clubs.

Dear White Women is a gentle but firm invitation to move beyond white fragility in order to reflect, reconsider, and evolve—and a powerful tool for anyone ready to do the work.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781951412432
Publisher:	The Collective Book Studio
Publication date:	10/12/2021
Sold by:	SIMON & SCHUSTER
Format:	eBook
Pages:	264
File size:	653 KB

About the Author

Sara Blanchard helps build community and connection through conscious conversations, which she does as a facilitator, TEDx speaker, writer, and consultant. After graduating from Harvard and working at Goldman Sachs, Sara pursued the science and techniques of well-being and is a certified life coach, author of Flex Mom, and co-host of Dear White Women, a social justice podcast. Sara is half-White and half-Japanese, married to a White Canadian man, and is raising their two White-presenting girls to be compassionate, thoughtful advocates. They live in Denver, Colorado, with their incredibly lovable dog.

A graduate of Harvard College and Columbia Law School, Misasha Suzuki Graham has been a practicing litigator for over 15 years, and is passionate about diversity, equity and inclusion in the legal profession as well as in her communities. She is a facilitator, writer, and speaker regarding issues of racial justice and children, and co-host of Dear White Women, a social justice podcast. Misasha, who is half-White and half-Japanese, is married to a Black man, and is the proud mom of two very active multiracial young boys. They live in the Bay Area of California with their largely indifferent cat.

Terri Givens is the CEO and Founder of Brighter Higher Ed. She is also a political scientist with more than 30 years of success in higher education, politics, international affairs, and non-profits. She is an accomplished speaker and uses her platform to develop leaders with an understanding of the importance of diversity and encourages personal growth through empathy. Terri has held leadership positions as Vice Provost at University of Texas at Austin and Provost of Menlo College (first African American and woman); professorships at University of Texas at Austin, and University of Washington. She was the founding director at the Center for European Studies at the University of Texas and led the university’s efforts in Mexico and Latin America as Vice Provost for International Activities. At Menlo College she has led faculty and staff in developing programs for first generation students, updating curriculum and infrastructure for evidence-based assessment. Terri is the author/editor of books and articles on immigration policy, European politics and security. Her most recent book is the memoir, Radical Empathy: Finding a Path to Bridging Racial Divides.

Table of Contents

Foreword ix

Introduction 1

Section I On Being White in America

1 Excuse Me, I Don't Have White Privilege 17

2 White Privilege-A Deeper Dive 29

3 Oh, Stop Being So Political 37

4 But I'm Not Racist 49

5 I Do Know Racists, Though 61

6 How Should I Talk with Black People about Race? 71

7 And Is It "Black" or "African American"? 79

8 How Do I Make Sure I Teach My Kids Well? 85

Section II On being black in America

9 Isn't the N-Word Okay Sometimes? 101

10 All Lives Matter, Blue Lives Matter 109

11 Driving While Black 117

12 But that Looting, Though 125

13 Gang Violence and Black-on-Black Crime 131

14 The Extra Stuff Black Women Go Through 143

15 School Choice, Busing, and Nice White Parents 151

16 Rooting for Everybody Black 159

Section III On being a non black person of color in America

17 The Dangers of the "China Flu" 169

18 Fancy Asians vs. Jungle Asians 179

19 Who Is Latinx, Anyway? 191

20 Native Americans: When an Entire Race Disappears from Modern History 201

21 Give Me Your Tired, Your Poor 211

Afterword: Which Side Mil You Stand On? 221

Recommendations 225

Sources 229

Acknowledgments 251

About the Authors 252

Editorial Reviews

08/09/2021

Blanchard (Flex Mom) and Graham, cohosts of the podcast Dear White Women, encourage white people of all genders to make an “intentional life change” with “practical steps towards becoming more anti-racist” in this accessible blend of history, psychology, and advice. They explain how white privilege works; address hot-button topics, including the use of the n-word by Black people and the concept of Black-on-Black crime, that can derail attempts to understand systemic racism; and discuss the Asian model minority stereotype and the “myth of the vanishing Native American.” The authors, both of whom are of mixed Japanese and white heritage, share their own stories of facing prejudice, and stress the importance of building friendships across racial lines and having political conversations in the “robust middle ground,” rather than “cancelling” others for their mistakes. Though the authors name common microaggressions such as “confusing one Black person for another” and “assuming that one person speaks for all people of that group,” they don’t explain why they are problematic, or how to repair the damage they may cause. Still, this gentle but firm guide will appeal to readers interested in putting the concept of anti-racism into action. (Oct.)

Publishers Weekly

"Dear white women: please do us all a favor and buy this book. Get ready to listen, learn, and ACT. Cause white supremacy is not cleaning up its mess without you." —Kate Schatz, NYT-bestselling author of Rad American Women A-Z and Rad Women Worldwide

"The conversation of race will never be comfortable until we make it comfortable by having the hard conversations. We are recreating the narratives to make a better future not just for ourselves but for our children." —Shanicia Boswell, Author and Founder of Black Moms Blog

"The invisibility of Native Americans from U.S. society must be a part of our racial reckoning, something Sara and Misasha have taken care to address in this thoughtful look at race in America." —Crystal Echo Hawk (Pawnee Nation of Oklahoma), Founder and Executive Director of IllumiNative

"This gentle but firm guide will appeal to readers interested in putting the concept of anti-racism into action." —Publishers Weekly

"Listen makes the issue relatable with a true story; Learn dives into any relevant history and context; and Act gives tangible strategies for navigating everyday situations and conversations." —5280 Magazine
 

From the Publisher

The conversation of race will never be comfortable until we make it comfortable by having the hard conversations. We are recreating the narratives to make a better future not just for ourselves but for our children.

Shanicia Boswell

The invisibility of Native Americans from U.S. society must be a part of our racial reckoning, something Sara and Misasha have taken care to address in this thoughtful look at race in America.

Crystal Echo Hawk (Pawnee Nation of Oklahoma)

Dear white women: please do us all a favor and buy this book. Get ready to listen, learn, and ACT. Cause white supremacy is not cleaning up its mess without you.

Kate Schatz

Listen makes the issue relatable with a true story; Learn dives into any relevant history and context; and Act gives tangible strategies for navigating everyday situations and conversations.

5280 Magazine