From Lost to Found: Giving Up What You Think You Want for What Will Set You Free

by Nicole Zasowski

Overview

Being Lost is the First Step to Getting Found

As a marriage and family therapist, one of Nicole Zasowski’s greatest joys is helping her clients grow in emotional freedom. What she couldn’t see for many years is that she was living her own life outside of that freedom, clinging to behaviors like shame, performance, and control in order to feel valued and safe.

It was only when she was confronted with her own devastating pain and loss that Nicole realized her current way of life was failing her. She then discovered that sometimes God’s rescue looks like prying our fingers off what we think we want so that we can receive what we truly need. And often, on the far side of pain we don’t prefer, we find transformation we would not trade.

In From Lost to Found, Nicole shares her story as she helps us

• name what we fear losing most,
• identify how our reactive behaviors are failing us,
• discover what joy we can find in letting go, and
• move forward in the freedom God has for us.

God is writing a story of redemption in your life too. Find out for yourself that sometimes the greatest joy is found when we are drained of all misplaced hope and shallow identities. In the midst of pain or transition, discover a surprising path to healing as you lose your grip on comfort and control—and fall right into God’s transformative grace.

Includes discussion questions for individual reflection or small group study

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780785226437
Publisher:	Nelson, Thomas, Inc.
Publication date:	01/28/2020
Pages:	224
Sales rank:	1,208,652
Product dimensions:	5.40(w) x 8.20(h) x 0.70(d)

About the Author

Nicole Zasowski is a licensed marriage and family therapist, writer, and speaker based in the state of Connecticut where she lives with her husband and son. As an old soul who wears her heart proudly on her sleeve, Nicole loves using her words to help others find an enduring peace and joy outside of circumstance.

Table of Contents

Foreword Elisabeth Hasselbeck xi

Introduction: An Unlikely Path to Healing xiii

Part 1 Called Out: The Pain of Losing What We Think We Want

1 California: Losing Comfort 3

2 A Heart Divided: Losing Security 15

3 A Wedding Invitation: Losing Companionship 23

4 When You're Called: Losing Approval 31

5 J. Crew and Manna: Losing My Vision 43

Called Out Discussion Questions 52

Part 2 Breaking Down: The Failure of Behaviors That Were Never Meant to Work

6 Yogis: The Failure of Control 55

7 Gluten-Free Pasta: The Failure of Perfection 67

8 Waves of Grace: The Failure of Performance 75

9 The Ladies Who Lunch: The Failure of Pride 87

Breaking Down Discussion Questions 96

Part 3 Breathing In: Finding a Lasting Peace

10 Home: Finding Refuge 99

11 Calmed Storms: Finding Peace 107

12 A Bigger Stage: Finding God's Glory 117

13 Enough: Finding Abundance 127

14 Growing: Finding God's Goodness 135

Breathing In Discussion Questions 142

Part 4 Looking Up: Choosing Joy Outside of Circumstance

15 Saturday: Choosing Hope 145

16 Beautiful: Choosing to See What Is Good 153

17 The Good Stuff: Choosing Interdependence 161

18 A Total Eclipse: Choosing Truth 171

19 How Sweet It Is: Choosing to Partner 179

20 Getting Found: Choosing Joy 189

Looking Up Discussion Questions 198

Thank You 199

Notes 205

About the Author 207

Editorial Reviews

'I have told women for years that Nicole is the kind of gal I am so grateful is leading our generation. She is wise and compassionate; plus she's honest, and her words are filled with hope. I have no doubt you'll feel led and loved well by God through her words, and I have no doubt this book will change your life in the best ways. Thank you, God, for Nicole, and thanks, God, for your truth! Give us ears to hear.'
Jess Connolly, bestselling author of You Are the Girl for the Job

'This book is what we are all looking for every day of our lives—a road map to freedom. So many of us find ourselves stuck in darkness, feeling around for a way out. Through Nicole's incredible story, study, and insight, she offers that way out, pointing us toward the greatest light and freedom there is—Jesus.'
Jefferson Bethke,New York Timesbestselling author of Jesusand gt;Religionand To Hell with the Hustle

'As a marriage and family therapist and as a woman who has lived the words she writes, Nicole teaches from the trenches, daring us to reimagine what it really means to be blessed. Through biblical wisdom, vulnerable personal narrative, and psychological insights, she illuminates an unlikely path to healing, showing us that when we release the defenses we once trusted in order to feel valued and safe, we find ourselves open to God's transforming grace.'
Jonathan Merritt, contributing writer for The Atlantic; author of Learning to Speak God from Scratch

'A beautiful story of breakthrough with powerful insights that will help you move from hurting to healing. You will love Nicole's honesty, wisdom, and helpfulness as she leads you on a journey to find emotional wellness.'
Mike Foster, author of You Rise Glorious and host of Fun Therapy

'From Lost to Found is the book I wish I had on my nightstand during my own season of struggle with fertility. With the warmth of your closest friend and the wisdom of your most trusted resource, Nicole holds nothing back as she reminds us of the growth that springs from unexpected circumstances and the beauty there is to be found in the wake of what has been lost. Take your time and let the truths in this book settle deep. From Lost to Found will leave you comforted, challenged, and changed.'
Heather Avis, bestselling author and narrative shifter

'From Lost to Found is an important work for anyone who has ever tried to prop up her life with accomplishments, security, and comfort—which is pretty much all of us. This gorgeously written story is much more than a bunch of pretty words strung together; this one is going to set women free.'
Jennifer Dukes Lee, author of It's All Under Control

'Maya Angelou once said the most important virtue was courage, as it was necessary to all other virtues—to be giving, loving, and kind. Nicole Zasowski's example of courageously finding her fears and giving them over to the lessons of faith is more than an inspiring story; it is, in short, a devotional guide to the fruits of the Spirit and becoming a loving follower of Jesus. Read and follow her lovely example.'
Terry Hargrave, PhD, Professor of Marriage and Family Therapy, Fuller Theological Seminary

'So many things make this spectacular book stand out. To begin, Nicole is a highly skilled and sought-after therapist, so the truths woven into this book spring from a deep well of professional knowledge and biblical wisdom. But because Nicole is both a gifted storyteller and a woman who intimately knows the loss and the hope about which she writes, this book reads like you're hearing from a longtime and loyal friend who understands where you've been and what you need to hear to keep growing. But best of all, Nicole wraps all of this in the good news of the gospel and shows us just how free we really are to be found in Christ alone.'
Jeannie Cunnion, author of Mom Set Free

'If you have ever tried to find your identity in more striving, performing, and achieving, this book is for you. If you have ever tried to white-knuckle control your life into the perfect picture on the outside while you were crumbling on the inside, this book is for you. And if you are ready to give up your grip on comfortable for the deeper, more meaningful places God is calling you, this book is definitely for you! In this important and necessary book, Nicole gives us the permission to come undone to everything we think defines us—these boxes we keep checking that only leave us feeling emptier—so that we can find true freedom that comes on the other side of letting go.'
Mary Marantz, author of Dirt, speaker, and host of The Mary Marantz Show

'From Lost to Found is a unique gift in that Nicole, a licensed marriage and family therapist, not only offers her expertise on emotional health but also vulnerably takes us along on her personal journey from pain to emotional freedom. This book is for anyone stuck in a cycle of pain, longing for emotional freedom, or (already) deep in the process of changing patterns and behaviors (like me). With the wisdom and practical steps found in these pages, coupled with God's ever-present help and grace, you're equipped to begin on the path to freedom. Spoiler alert: joy and peace are not the destination; they are welcome companions in the process.'
Trina McNeilly, author of La La Lovely: The Art of Finding Beauty in the Everyday

'From Lost to Found hits us all between the eyes as we deal with the reality of how we struggle with control. Nicole's vulnerability and honesty are key in how we can be honest with ourselves, allowing God to give us the freedom to be who he has called us to be. Don't miss this wonderful read!'
Cheryl Scruggs, host of the Thriving Beyond Belief podcast for women

'Nicole's story of losing and finding is both hers and all of ours. She reminds us—beautifully—that sometimes what we assume is an ending may actually be the seeds of a sacred beginning. Thank you, Nicole, for bravely opening your hands so we might learn to trust the mystery of surrender.'
Leeana Tankersley, author of Always We Begin Again

From the Publisher