A hilariously candid account of one woman's quest to bring her post-baby marriage back from the brink, with life-changing, real-world advice.
"Get this for your pregnant friends, or yourself." People
Recommended by Nicole Cliffe in Slate
Featured in People Picks
A Red Tricycle Best Baby and Toddler Parenting Book of the year
One of Mother magazine's favorite parenting books of the year
How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids tackles the last taboo subject of parenthood: the startling, white-hot fury that new (and not-so-new) mothers often have for their mates. After Jancee Dunn had her baby, she found that she was doing virtually all the household chores, even though she and her husband worked equal hours. She asked herself: How did I become the 'expert' at changing a diaper?
Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage - and the way their marriage will affect their child.
Enter Dunn, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today.
On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluateand rebuildyour marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children.
Part memoir, part self-help book with actionable and achievable advice, How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids is an eye-opening look at how the man who got you into this position in this first place is the ally you didn't know you had.
|Publisher:||Little, Brown and Company|
|Product dimensions:||5.40(w) x 8.20(h) x 0.80(d)|
About the Author
Jancee Dunn is the New York Times bestselling author of five books, including a memoir, a children's book, and Cyndi Lauper: A Memoir. Her essay collection, Why Is My Mother Getting a Tattoo? was a finalist for the Thurber Prize for American Humor. She is a frequent contributor to The New York Times, Vogue, O, The Oprah Magazine, and Parents. She lives in Brooklyn with her husband and daughter.
Table of Contents
Introduction: Maters Gonna Hate 3
Mothers, Fathers, Issues 26
"Get off Your Ass and Help Out!": Our Harrowing Encounter with the Man from Boston 54
Rage Against the Washing Machine: How to Divvy Up Chores 82
Rules of Fight Club 113
TGIM: How Not to Hate Your Weekends After Kids 147
Guess What? Your Kids Can Fold Their Own Laundry 167
Bone of Contention 188
Kids: Your New Budget Deficit 208
Hot Mess: Less Clutter, Fewer Fights 222
Know That Eventually It's Going to Be Just the Two of You Again-Well, Unless Another Recession Hits 240
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
Now, while I have neither a husband or children, there were a lot of moments where I found myself nodding along to something Dunn was writing about and before I knew it, I was reaching for a pen to write notes. I shared my other copy with my good friend, Amy who does indeed have a husband and two lovely kiddos (70% of the time by her own admission) and she said that this book completely changed her outlook and approaches with her family. From help with household chores, finding more ‘me’ time, and general happiness, I’ve seen Dunn’s book work wonders! How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids is a humorous, heartfelt, and honest memoir/self-help book where Jancee Dunn describes how her marital dynamics changed with the arrival of their daughter. Rather than throwing in the dishtowel, Dunn made it her mission to seek out experts and therapists in a great attempt to save her marriage and, in the process, once again find the man she fell in love with. During one of her ‘me’ times Amy and I were discussing how after reading the book, we felt that Jancee had become a very good friend and her book seemed to be speaking directly to us about so many things. This is truly a book for everyone! Dunn is able to relate her firsthand experiences with such wit and wisdom that you’ll be simultaneously making mental notes and laughing out loud.
Should be required reading for anyone with children!