How to Be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Flawless Spiritual Living

How to Be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Flawless Spiritual Living

by The Babylon Bee

Hardcover(Comprehens)

$17.99 $19.99 Save 10% Current price is $17.99, Original price is $19.99. You Save 10%.
View All Available Formats & Editions
Choose Expedited Shipping at checkout for guaranteed delivery by Monday, July 1

Overview

With a biting, satirical style reminiscent of The OnionHow to Be a Perfect Christian takes a humorous look at the quirks of cultural Christianity while subtly challenging the reader to search for more than a cultural faith.

Written in the trademark style of The Babylon Bee, this book humorously satirizes cultural Christianity while peppering in subtle challenges to the reader. Through humor and sarcasm (and a handy meter to rank your "holiness" as you progress through the book), readers will be called to find a more biblical understanding of the Christian faith, all while poking fun at the quirks of the modern, American Christian community.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780735291522
Publisher: The Crown Publishing Group
Publication date: 05/01/2018
Edition description: Comprehens
Pages: 208
Sales rank: 225,318
Product dimensions: 5.40(w) x 8.30(h) x 0.70(d)

About the Author

The Babylon Bee is the most popular Christian satire website, with more than 300,000 Facebook fans, and over 70,000 visitors to the website daily. They are a trusted voice in humor across a wide range of modern Christians.

Read an Excerpt

One

Joining the Right Church

If you’ve ever felt a modicum of displeasure at your church, even if just for a fleeting second, get out of there immediately and find a new one.

—C. S. Lewis

You want to be a perfect Christian, and that is a noble goal indeed. But first things first. It’s impossible to get to the maximum level of holiness if you’re currently attending a church that is focused on the wrong things, namely, on anything other than you.

Paul David Tripp once wrote that church is a place “where flawed people place their faith in Christ, gather to know and love him better, and learn to love others as he designed.” It’s a nice sentiment, but it’s also completely wrong. Flawed people? Excuse us, Paul, but we’re trying to become absolutely perfect here, not hang out with a bunch of messed-up folks. We don’t need that kind of negativity in our lives.

And neither do you—which is why you’re reading this book. [1]

We know you may have feelings of loyalty or attachment to the humble, local expression of the body of Christ that you’ve been a part of for years. You need to rid yourself of these unholy emotions. It’s time to step back and objectively evaluate whether or not your church is properly equipped to encourage you on your sacred quest to become the ultimate manifestation of impeccable spirituality.

So open your eyes and start looking for the red flags that indicate your church isn’t a spiritually fulfilling congregation.

Some of the most common warning signs that your church isn’t conducive to your personal growth into a perfect Christian include a pastor who preaches sermons that make you feel uncomfortable, a worship experience that centers your attention more on God than on your own feelings, and a church staff who refuse to incorporate the advice from the thousands of helpful comment cards you’ve left over the years. These kinds of churches are dangerous. If you find yourself treading water in a similar spiritual wasteland, it’s time for your very first step toward spiritual awesomeness: church shopping.

Your journey to living a flawless Christian life begins today! Ditch that group of hopeless losers who have been holding you back and instead find a church that’s built around you—and all of your needs and desires.

According to recent research, every single town in America has a minimum of 6,521,587 churches to choose from, so you’ve got your work cut out for you. You actually have a better chance of winning the lottery while getting struck by lightning than of picking a good church near you on the first shot. So it’s a great thing you have this book to help you out.

In the olden days of the apostles (circa 1950), there were just a few churches in town. If you wanted to visit one, you had to put on your Sunday best and build up the courage to march right in the front door without having a clue as to what to expect. What a nightmare. But—thanks be to God—these are the days of the World Wide Web, a magical portal to all kinds of great resources (and almost nothing bad or degrading—lots of wholesome stuff, mostly). So you get what the church fathers could only dream of: the benefit of shopping around online for a church from the comfort of your own home.

Approximately twenty years after the magical Internet sprung up out of nowhere and revolutionized modern communication and commerce, churches discovered they, too, could create a website and spread the good news through the magic of technology. So the first step in selecting a new, improved local body of Christ is to Google churches nearby and start separating the wheat from the chaff.

Try search terms like “church near me that has cool coffee bar” or “church near me that isn’t weird or stuffy” or “good trendy church near me that uses T-shirt cannons.” Just have fun with it. You ought to use any search terms you think will help you sift through the millions of nonpersonalized churches in your area and find a true diamond in the rough: a church that emphasizes and cultivates the historical Christian virtues of convenience and comfort.

Your search will likely return approximately four billion hits, but don’t worry—we’ll sort through them together.

The first thing to look at is the church’s name, which provides all kinds of clues to help rule out churches that stubbornly refuse to cater to your felt needs 24/7. A lame name is a big no-no.

What you’re really looking for is a church with a name that either sounds like a retirement community or a natural disaster.

Whispering Pines Community Church or Cedar Grove Church, for instance, are probably churches that are worthy of your presence. These names could easily be confused with an apartment complex, a mini-mall, or a delightful retirement community—consider this a sign that you’re on the right track.

Alternatively, the church should have a name reminiscent of a destructive act of God. For example, consider checking out churches with names like Granite Deluge of Life, Floodwaters Collective, Whirlwind Love Fellowship, or Blazing Inferno Church. If the church sounds like its name alone could crush you under the destructive weight of its awesomeness, you’re probably going to be in for an exciting, you-centric experience.

What you should be very cautious of is any church with a name that brazenly indicates an affiliation with any of the major evangelical denominations, just hanging out there for the whole world to see. First Baptist Church, Grace Methodist Church, or New Life Presbyterian Church are examples of churches to avoid. After all, you’re looking for an organic, custom-fit experience, not a stuffy old denomination. If the church meets you halfway with a name like Hurricane of Life Baptist, proceed, but with caution.

Speaking of Baptists, this would be a good time to get into some specifics about denominations. There are several denominations to choose from. So let’s break down what each of them has in store for you.

If you do decide to go with a Baptist church, it’s certainly a noble heritage. Baptist churches have been around since, well, John the Baptist. It’s right in his name. This means that Baptist churches have literally been around since before the New Testament, so you know you’re going to please God by attending one of His elect church denominations.

Be warned, however, that Baptist churches come with a lot of rules, even though you do get really great potlucks chock full of superhealthy food. First of all, you can’t consume any drink stronger than a Diet Mountain Dew within fifty feet of a Baptist church. Trust us, it’s in the church’s bylaws. Also, the closest you’re allowed to get to dancing is an awkward swaying motion during a really powerful praise chorus or hymn, and even that’s a real gray area, so be really, really careful.

If the Baptists sound too stuffy, you could try the Pentecostals, who allow you to get drunk, but only on the Holy Spirit (it’s not as awesome as it sounds). Pentecostalism was conceived by a group of Christians who were totally high after attending a particularly groovy ABBA concert in Southern California in the fall of ’79. As a result, this denomination is totally cool with dancing, especially during worship songs, sermons, announcements, the offertory—it’s pretty much Soul Train at all times when you’re among a charismatic congregation. Just be sure to pack your own tambourine or dancing ribbon so you’ll fit right in when wild, noisy gyrations begin erupting all around you.

For those of you who consider yourselves truly righteous, you might want to choose a Presbyterian or Reformed church. [2] These guys don’t have time to mess around, so you’d better fall in line once you join their ranks. So much as a single hand raised in the air during an awesome, obscure hymn you’ve probably never heard of can land you a disciplinary hearing with the deacons—and you do not want to mess with them. There are stories of Reformed deacon boards “disappearing” problem parishioners and erasing any evidence of their existence from all public records. They’re cool with beer though, as long as it’s a craft microbrew with a high enough alcohol content to put down a mature African elephant. [3]

Mainline denominations can be a nice choice because they won’t really hold you to any theological standards. Mainline doctrinal statements consist solely of questions. But by the time you’ve finished reading this sentence, odds are that every mainline church near you will have closed its doors due to bleeding beliefs and declining attendance. So that’s probably not a solid option for you anyway.

If in your searching you happen to unearth a disquieting website featuring the Times New Roman font, late twentieth-century design principles, several spinning GIFs of Satan’s likeness, and links to hundreds of articles about how the NIV was created by an alliance between Beelzebub and the Illuminati in an Area 51 research lab, you’ve stumbled upon a King James–only church. Feel free to check them out, but make sure you bring your ESV, NLT, or The Message translation with you when you go. They are really reasonable and level-headed when it comes to discussing translations other than the Authorized Version from 1611, and dialoguing with these folks can be a joyful and edifying experience. [4]

So you could try any of the above denominations, but then you’d end up being a total weirdo and not a cool, spiritual, holy, perfect Christian.

Wait…what?

Yes, we tricked you. Did you think it would be that easy to become a perfect Christian?

If you’ve been paying even the slightest bit of attention, you ought to understand that you should avoid all of the crazy name-brand quacks and just jump right into a nondenominational paradise.

So go back to your Google search. Click on the most promising nondenom link you see with a sweet name, and let’s check out their online presence.

In addition to a killer church name and a lack of denominational identity, a church that will help you achieve perfection will have a superslick website. Any local body that hasn’t updated its upcoming-events page since the fall picnic of 2002 should be rejected out of hand. Their lack of Web 3.0 skills obviously indicates they don’t care about Jesus at all. You want up-to-the-minute information telling everyone what the pastor is up to, live streaming video for those Sundays when you just don’t feel like going to church, and tons of upcoming events and programs for your entertainment.

Once you manage to find a website belonging to a run-of-the-mill nondenominational church displaying acceptable web design prowess, there are a few other key indicators to look for to make sure it’s the kind of place you want to be on a Sunday morning.

One of the marks of a healthy church website is the frequent use of heavily filtered stock images that perfectly encapsulate that aesthetic you need to truly worship the Lord. If the church site you’re checking out has pictures of people with a realistic level of attractiveness, close your Internet tab right away and try again. Ideally, the church you target will feature several images of young, unrealistically attractive models smiling and raising their hands as if worshipping with reckless abandon or desperately trying to flag down a passing car.

Another important mark of a healthy church is that it does not have a statement of faith. If there is a list of dogmatic beliefs anywhere on the website, no matter how well it’s hidden, run. Flee. Stay very far away. At most, allow for the church to have a vague page titled “Our Journey” or “The God Story” that lays out a very fluid set of general teachings in poetic cadence. A beliefs page that simply lists some U2 lyrics is all right by us too, as long as they’re not from that awful Pop album.

 

Unacceptable

Statement of Faith

Excerpt

We believe the Bible to

be the Word of God,

perfect in all its parts,

truth without any

mixture of error, and

useful for all areas of

the believer’s life.

 

Acceptable

Statement of Faith

Excerpt

In the locust wind comes a rattle and hum

Jacob wrestled the angel

And the angel was overcome

 

Remember, you’re going to be stuck at this place for months or, in rare instances, years. You want a place that’s not going to pin you down too rigidly on any of your key doctrinal beliefs. Their positions should be vague enough that you can slip by with your shifting, undefined understanding of the Christian faith completely intact. We know it’s difficult to pass on a church that checks all the right boxes but fails in this regard, but we’re looking out for you, and you have to trust us. The last thing you want is to be forced to take a stance on a core doctrine of the Christian faith. This is for your own good, brother or sister in Christ!

Navigating through the website’s various pages and menus, you ought to find their logo prominently displayed (ideally, it should take up the entire top half of your screen, but we won’t be too rigid on this). Make sure the church has a logo that is just straight fire. Literally. It should have fire in it. Or water. Glorious, blazing fire or cool, refreshing water. But barring these two metaphorical images, something really modern and ornate is ideal. A simple cross or clip-art image of a Bible is so ten years ago and not befitting a cutting-edge body of Christ or a Christian as awesome as you.

Finally, surf your way to the part of the website where you can check out the vast array of ministries and services your potential new church has to offer. If you find only Sunday morning services, Wednesday night Bible studies, and a small group or two listed, that’s just not gonna cut it. This is a huge red flag, and you’ve got to cut this one loose. A respectable church should offer more upcoming shindigs than any local club, venue, or arena. We’re talking no less than three dozen wild events in the next month. That’s a bare minimum.

 

[1] We again commend you on your impeccable discernment in choosing this piece of literature. Some suckers are reading a Tim Keller book right now with all his C. S. Lewis quotes and Lord of the Rings excerpts. Chumps, all of them. Keller books are a dime a dozen, while this book is going to go down in the annals of history as a turning point for Christianity. Think Pilgrim’s Progress or The Purpose Driven Life, then kick it up a few levels, and that’s the book you’re holding right now. Not quite canonical, but the next best thing.

[2] Of course, never, ever say you chose a Reformed church. Always say that God, in His sovereignty, predestined you from eternity past to attend said church, for His glory alone.

[3] We’ll have more to say about beer later in the book.

[4] Please note: The Babylon Bee bears no responsibility for your well-being should you attempt this maneuver.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

See All Customer Reviews

How to Be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Flawless Spiritual Living 3.8 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 15 reviews.
LGHudson More than 1 year ago
NOT WHAT I EXPECTED I’ve enjoyed many of the FB posts of The Babylon Bee and I was looking forward to reading this book. I was sent this book as part of being on the Launch Team. However, this is the only ARC book I’ve ever misplaced. I have to admit that now that I’ve read it, I’m glad I misplaced it. I found it to be a big disappointment. I know it’s all written in SATIRE. I think it’s just too much for me in book form. Also, it may be because I am a member of what was once one of the leading churches in our entire denomination and now we are in shambles! It’s difficult for me to appreciate satire about being a Christian or about church when I am seeing and experiencing so much personally. I was provided an ARC of this book by the Publisher. The opinions expressed here are completely my own and without influence.
Kathae More than 1 year ago
The writers of the Babylon Bee have used their satirical humor to take a good look at today's cultural Christianity. They have broken down the quest to be a perfect Christian into doable steps, while tongue-in-cheek exploring current views on church, worship, and lifestyle. Whether or not you are familiar with The Babylon Bee's satirical articles online, this book will surely cause you to think as you guffaw at the absurdities and extremes it highlights in today's Christian culture. It's worth the read! I received a copy of this book from the publisher, Multnomah, for review purposes. The thoughts expressed here are my own.
GailHollingsworth More than 1 year ago
This was my first experience with The Babylon Bee and I really didn't know what to expect. It contained some humor. I got a few chuckles at the take on modern Christians. There was lots of exaggeration but sadly some ridicule of followers of Jesus Christ. There are no perfect Christians of course but I would not recommend this book to new believers who may not understand the humor in the jabs. I received a copy from the publisher but was not required to write a review. #PRHpartner, @WaterBrookMultnomah
soccerkidsmom More than 1 year ago
How to Be a Perfect Christian by The Babylon Bee is a satirical look at Christianity, so if you are a serious-minded person that doesn't like satire or sarcasm, then this book might not be the right one for you. With over 300,000 Facebook fans and many visitors daily to its website, The Babylon Bee pokes fun at the quirks of Christianity today, such as the church potluck dinners and finding the perfect pastor. Do you keep score with how you are doing in the holiness category? There's even a Holiness Progress Tracker to aid you in that endeavor. The sad thing that I took away from this is that some Christians actually live their lives in competition with other Christians trying to outdo them in the holiness category, and some feel they need to earn their way to heaven and keep score on how well they are doing.
ARS8 More than 1 year ago
This book is an ingenious collection of satirical quips and sarcastic remarks that both vastly amuse the reader and shine a humorous light on the Christian culture’s au fait trends. It doesn’t hesitate to poke fun at denominational traditions nor the ‘public’ life that revolves around social media. In an entirely fun and comedic way, How to Be a Perfect Christian displays (not in a shy or reserved way) the quirky and somewhat odd activities and beliefs of mainstream Christians. Its ultimate underlying message, although funny in its pursuit is to point out, is that the journey to becoming ‘the perfect Christian!’ isn’t about what you look like, what church you go to, or even what you post on your Facebook and Twitter accounts that matters. But for who you decide to live your life for: your own righteous self and to the glorious end of making other people wish they were as holy and flawless as you or that Jesus fellow you follow. I received a complimentary copy of this novel. I was not required to post a positive review and all views and opinions are my own.
RockandMinerals4Him More than 1 year ago
If you take books seriously, then this one is not the one for you! How to be a Perfect Christian is FULL of satire/sarcasm (the one authentic line is probably the acknowledgements). The Babylon Bee, a satirical Christian site, is well known for poking fun of Christian habits (reminiscent of John Crist), and while I haven't really followed it, the book really gave me a taste of what they were about! The entire book is basically a huge Christian inside joke, ranging from Baptist potlucks to worship services to youth group. Granted, it would probably thoroughly confuse anyone who wasn't Christian, or didn't have quite a bit of experience in the church. So long as it is not taken seriously, this is a very humorous book! And even seriously, this book highlights some of the hypocrisy within the church and the little quirks and double standard of within the church. My Ranking- 3/5 Things Liked- super funny! a big Christian inside joke some important truths presented Things Disliked- definitely will not appeal to nonChristians, and may confuse them if they were to read it sometimes things were presented a little too hard Thanks to the publisher, Waterbrook and Multnomah, for providing me with a complimentary print copy of the book in exchange for my honest review; I was not required to write a positive review. This review first appeared on: https://rockandminerals4him.wordpress.com/2018/05/09/book-review-how-to-be-a-perfect-christian-by-the-babylon-bee/
Carstairs38 More than 1 year ago
This book does just what the title says. In ten chapters, it tells you exactly how to live like a perfect Christian. Oh, we aren’t worried about the fruit of the spirit or holiness or anything hard like that. We are talking about finding the perfect church (one that is focused on you), “doing life together,” serving without ever lifting a finger, looking spiritual online (I’m sure they left out reviewing this book in that chapter), and quarantining your home from non-Christian culture. And if you aren’t familiar with The Babylon Bee, it is a fantastic satire site that looks at Christian culture and the world from a Christian perspective. I’ve become addicted to their articles, so when I saw this book was coming out, I had to get it. I’m not kidding when I saw there is a laugh on every page as the book mercilessly mocks what many Christians in modern day America focus on. And there were times that the book convicted me since I live a little too much like the person they are mocking. At least some portions of this book have appeared in shorter form on the site, but everything here blends together perfectly for a comprehensive and very funny whole.
bookbloggerKB More than 1 year ago
How to be a Perfect Christian by the Babylon Bee Okay, let’s just say that this book is a little sarcastic. It contains advice on how to attain Christian perfection by attending the right church—the one that recognizes you as the spiritual super star that you are. Also included are chapters on worshiping like a pro and fighting on the front lines of the culture war. In short, there is everything that you, as an up and coming perfect Christian, need to know. And the book helps you gauge your growth via the included holiness progress tracker 5000 that gauges your progress against Satan, Judas, Cain, David, the Apostle Paul, Job, John the Baptist and Jesus! Oh, look, you already passed up Judas because you are reading this review! This book is not for the thin-skinned. It pokes fun at a lot of things Christians hold dear. But as I read, I kept in mind the source. And some of the points were thought-provoking. Actually, the sarcasm began to grow old after the first couple of chapters, but because I was so motivated to attain perfection, I read on! You, too, can attain this blissful state, especially if you read this book. I will happily loan you my copy (because I’m generous like that), which I received free from the publisher for this my honest review. #PRHpartner
NadineTimes10 More than 1 year ago
Satire isn't my usual thing, but when the publisher unexpectedly sent me a copy of this book, I figured, hey, why not take a look? And, then, the book got me within the first few pages, letting me know how Christian culture can lead me to be "transformed day by day into the radiant image of the modern American Jesus." Hello. Sounds like a goal. Especially if He's the Son of a Father "who sits on a cloud somewhere...and is suspicious of non-Americans and people with brown skin." Uh huh. So. Do I totally agree with the attitude of the Bee at every point in this comprehensive guide? Nah. I think some of the Bee's blanket jokes might overlook how issues like manipulation and abuse are very real problems in too many churches (what's making folks feel horrible at church isn't always holy conviction), and for a lot of people, matters of social justice aren't merely "politics," or concepts to debate. They're real matters of life and death. Still, I doubt the point of a book like this is to make you agree with all of it. Satire is supposed to make you *think.* Not to simply laugh, or not to only be offended, but to really stop and think about something in life or society (or Christian culture) that's backward or off. Make no mistake, though. I did heartily crack up while reading this thing. And the conclusion is, well, beautiful, I must say. ________ WaterBrook & Multnomah provided me with a complimentary copy of this book, for which I've given an honest review.
Becky6 More than 1 year ago
The Babylon Bee is a well-known Christian satire news site so going in, I knew that I needed to read “How to be a Perfect Christian.” If you’re like me and have grown up in church practically your whole life and bought into dcTalk, kissing dating goodbye, WWJD bracelets, and everything else, then you’ll love this. The authors’ joke about many things that believers say and do and even how it comes across to other people. I mean, it is a book about being superficially perfect and they show how it’s a goal you can achieve. While most of the book is hilarious, many statements they make are completely true and make you stop and think about the motives behind what you say and do. Do I go to church just to go and make an appearance? Do I find myself personally convicted between KJV or an ESV and then attack anyone who doesn’t agree? Do I only have a quiet time with God only to post about it on social media? Is worship only a feeling? Is church supposed to be all about me? Do I expect to serve or be served? Do I expect to grow from the sermon or do I expect some big inspirational to make me feel good instead? This is one of those books that will make you stop and think about your motives as a Christian. It also calls out the modern church on things that need to be called out. When I first started the book, I was only going to start a chapter or two, but then I found myself reading the entire thing in one sitting. So expect a quick, fast-paced read and full-blown laughter that will cause people to stare at you and wonder what’s so funny. For parents, the book is squeaky clean, but the authors’ do use the words “heck” and “damn” quite a bit. This is mostly sarcastic, but they do share the Gospel in a casual way and refer to God as “our homeboy” so be discerning as you read. Highly recommended for those are believers high school aged and up and know how to discern joke from the truth. This is also meant for people who can take a joke and even laugh at themselves. I wouldn’t recommend this for a new believer or a non-Christian because this might be confusing. This would also make a great gift for your loved ones. Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for my honest review, which I have given. I was not required to write a positive review and have not been compensated for it in any way. All opinions expressed are my own.oming soon.
annelr More than 1 year ago
How to Be a Perfect Christian by The Babylon Bee is satire at its finest. Never having heard of The Babylon Bee, I was not quite sure what to expect but I will say that this book had me laughing out loud and sharing passages with my husband. The authors have touched on a number of subjects surrounding the church and Christianity that are often points of contention between different sets of believers. From picking the right church--one that recognizes it is all about you, has a crack squad welcome team, has a worship team that is made up of attractive people, the right billboard and don't forget the Lazarus Latte from the coffee bar--to sharing evangelism methods that are guaranteed to drag sinners kicking and screaming into the kingdom, this book makes sure the reader has all the information needed to be the perfect Christian. At the beginning of each chapter is an inauthentic quote by famous people and at the end of the chapter is the Holiness Progress Tracker 5000 that allows the reader to see how he is progressing towards perfection. Satire is meant to expose and criticize issues through humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule and the authors have achieved their intent in this book. Through humor, exaggeration, and ridicule they remind us of the incredible expression of God's love that perfection is only achieved through the righteousness of Jesus Christ being credited to us through faith. But if it were not about doing the right things and avoiding all the wrong things then this book is pointless. And who would want to read a pointless book, eh? How to Be a Perfect Christian is a hilarious satirical comprehensive guide to how we humans can strive to be good enough. Fun gift for your friends and a must-have book for the church library. I received a complimentary copy of the book from Multnomah Publisher and was not required to write a review. The opinions are my own. #PRHpartner.
connywithay More than 1 year ago
“… a perfect Christian is one who conforms to the man-made standards of the Christian faith in any given age,” Adam Ford and Kyle Mann sarcastically state at the beginning of their book, How to Be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Spiritual Living. ~ What ~ A Babylon Bee product, this two-hundred-and-eight-page hardbound targets those who enjoy a comedic mocking of Christians attaining supposed perfectionism in our current day world. Containing a couple of slang words, the topics should be taken lightly, especially by the spiritually immature or non-believer. Using mainly the New International Version, the ESV is also referenced with other Bible titles mentioned in passing. After an introduction, this book is divided into ten chapters that sarcastically help launch a Christian into perfectionism akin to being like Jesus Christ. Complete with a Holiness Progress Tracker, the sections include subjects like how to join the right church, worship like a pro, engage in spiritual activities, fake serving the body of Christ, look like a true believer on social media, make your home appear holy, avoid all appearances of evil, deal with those who do not believe the same, and more – all told tongue-in-cheek yet often mimicking real life as a believer. ~ Why ~ This book is geared for those who love to make fun that we as Christians can achieve a G0d-like attitude, faith, belief, and appearance here on Planet Earth. Having gone through many of the same experiences, I felt it was spot on regarding the watered down versions of the Bible, megachurches with their event production programs, and warning of ridiculous legalism while told humorously and over the top. ~ Why Not ~ Those who do not have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ may want to avoid this book that often “tells it as it is” even though it is done comically. Others may find it offensive as it mocks reading the Bible (if you do that daily), earnest prayer (if that is your passion), or witnessing to others (which you may not even know what that is). If the rampant humor is peeled away, the book may be perceived as negative, sacrilegious, and perhaps hopeless, yet only page 191 about God has a redemptive “it’s not about you and what you do but Jesus and His ultimate grace ” tone. ~ Wish ~ While I love dry wit and sarcasm, which this book has plenty, I wish it did not mock the core values of Christianity, leaving no stone untouched as it bashed the basics of faith, grace, love, and forgiveness Jesus teaches. I found when Scriptures were used, they were abused, which seem to demean God’s purpose. No, I am not a better-than-you-pompous-saint, but I felt uncomfortable reading the book, deeply concerned how a non-or new-believer would perceive it. ~ Want ~ If you want a laugh about how pathetic Christianity has become, mainly in the church, this one will give you a chuckle, but be warned that underlying, it is not edifying or constructive, so for strictly this reason, I have marked it down considerably reviewing it. Thanks to the Waterbrook & Multnomah Launch Team for this complimentary book that I am under no obligation to review.
Librarycataloger More than 1 year ago
I must admit that I wasn't familiar with Babylon Bee before I started reading this book so I was somewhat taken aback by chapters titled 'Crusading Against the Heathens' and 'Serving in Church Without Ever Lifting a Finger'. It didn't take long to realize that there had to be a whole lot of sarcasm between the front and back covers or I was completely misunderstanding this book's concept. It was when I read that I should never stay at a church where I'm NOT the PRIMARY focus that I definitely knew that this was satire at its finest! Babylon Bee is a popular website totally dedicated to Christian news satire and "How to be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Flawless Spiritual Living" is their debut book. It is very intriguing and I found myself returning to chapters that I had already read because there are amazing, thought-provoking statements that are worth reading over and over again! Yes, it is full of puns that will have you laughing out loud but this book will also prompt you to take a long, hard look at what you truly believe. The final paragraphs state what the "perfect Christian" truly understands and believes: the key to perfection is rooted in God's love and Jesus Christ's sacrifice! I received a free copy from Multnomah but I voluntarily reviewed this book and these are my honest thoughts.
SemmieWise More than 1 year ago
** “But this whole book would then be pointless, because being a Christian wouldn’t be about doing the right things and avoiding the wrong things. It would be about glorifying God in our lives because we adore and trust the One who loved us enough to give up everything for us.” ** The Babylon Bee, known for producing today’s most popular Christian satire while poking fun at Christianity’s trends and traditions, has stepped up its game with a new book, “How to Be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Flawless Spiritual Living.” A quick and easy read (I finished in less than 24 hours), this book will leave you laughing so hard tears will be rolling down your cheeks, all while also convicting you of how we have treated Christianity and the Christian’s role in the world. With chapters like “Joining the Right Church,” “Serving in Church Without Ever Lifting a Finger” and “Quarantining Your Home from the Worldly Wastelands,” The Babylon Bee hits us right between the eyes with how much we focus on either the traditions or the trends … and not enough on the fact that God sent His son, Jesus, to die for our sins. With this book, everything is fair game — from Awana, to trendy coffee bars at church, from social media posts (must include coffee!), the-bigger-the-better study Bibles. This book will challenge readers to look into their intentions and beliefs and to decide what is truly important about Christianity … all while laughing their heads off. While it snarkily comments on the hard-fast, tried-and-true traditions as well as the latest fads and trends, “How to Be a Perfect Christian” makes sure to bring everything to an end with the true meaning of becoming a “perfect” Christian — believing in and accepting Christ’s sacrifice for us. Five stars out of five. Multnomah provided this complimentary copy for my honest, unbiased review.
BPenceofCoramDeotheBlog More than 1 year ago
I’ve been enjoying the witty satire from The Babylon Bee for the past few years and had been looking forward to this book, which doesn’t disappoint. I had a smile on my face the entire time I was reading this book by Adam Ford and Kyle Mann as they give the reader tongue in cheek advice on how to be the perfect Christian. As you work your way through the book on your journey to becoming the perfect Christian, you can get helpful updates by using The Babylon Bee’s proprietary “Holiness Progress Tracker 5000”. The authors tell us how to find just the right church to join - one that is focused on solely on you. They encourage you to find a church that emphasizes and cultivates the historical Christian virtues of convenience and comfort. The authors walk the reader through topics such as the church auditorium, worship service, worship leader, pastor, small groups, praying in public, the use of Christianese, serving (or not), your online presence (this section really nailed me), films to watch, the need to home school, vote Republican, etc. They do all of this is a humorous manner, but also in a way that hits pretty close to home at times. Highly recommended for those who wish to be the perfect Christian!