Moms Bringing Out the Best in Dads: Teaming Up to Help Your Family Thrive
192
Moms Bringing Out the Best in Dads: Teaming Up to Help Your Family Thrive
192Paperback
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Overview
- work and communicate with your husband to protect, shepherd, and empower your kids
- nudge, sweet-talk, and motivate each other on this mission that must not fail
- understand and appreciate your husband’s unique talents as a father—and identify how your own gifts can serve as a complement
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9780736983945 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Harvest House Publishers |
| Publication date: | 02/01/2022 |
| Pages: | 192 |
| Sales rank: | 1,062,741 |
| Product dimensions: | 5.00(w) x 6.90(h) x 0.60(d) |
About the Author
Read an Excerpt
We live in a fatherless period in time.
I think often of this verse from a fatherless time in ancient history. What a promise God made as the final ink on the last pages of the Old Testament began to dry:
He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers. (Malachi 4:6)
I’ve used this verse as a prayer in my home, asking God to make me the kind of mother who partners with God in turning the hearts of the Gresh children (and grandchildren) toward Bob! The kind of woman who turns Bob’s heart toward our children (and grandchildren). If your children, like mine, have an involved dad in their lives, they are blessed. Let’s be the kind of women who live as if we believe that!
My husband is what we call a Wolf Dad. He and I learned the term years ago from a mentor who was teaching us about parenting. You see, wolves co-parent, but they fulfill very different roles.
For the first six months of life, a litter of cubs stays in the den receiving nurture, nourishment, and protection from “mom.” During that time, if a cub attempts to wander from the den, she gently picks it up by the scruff of the neck and draws it deep back in. Her job is to keep the pups safe, teach them to groom themselves, and cuddle. Otherwise, they would not bond.
But after six months, “dad” steps in. He invites those cuddly pups out of the den. In fact, sometimes he pushes them out. With each invitation or push, the litter goes farther and farther with him. Eventually, they make it far enough to play a game of relay using sticks. His job is to teach them to take risks and to be hunters. Otherwise, they would not survive.
Bob and I believe that mothers and fathers, like co-parenting wolves, have different roles to play in the lives of children. We also believe that those differences should be celebrated and affirmed. Sadly, that’s not what many women do when their husband parent differently. When they act likes dads!
That’s why I’m so thankful for this book from Jay. He provides practical advice for wives and moms to celebrate and affirm the unique role a dad plays in a child’s development. This book will help you encourage your husband to move into his hero role in your family. That includes letting him parent differently. And, of course, it includes knowing when and how to practically help him or advise him.
From something as simple as teaching dads to swaddle a baby using the burrito fold to practical strategies for activating their strengths while overcoming their weaknesses, you have incredible opportunities to help your husband become the hero your children need. Jay Payleitner speaks from the perspective of personal experience and biblical truth to equip moms and encourage dads.
I’ve been following Jay for years, and I’m so thankful he has written this great book for women. Dive into the pages of it. It’ll help you become the kind of woman who turns the hearts of a father and his children toward one another!
Dannah Gresh, author of Six Ways to Keep the Little in Your Girl and Six Ways to Keep the Good in Your Boy; founder, True Girl
Table of Contents
Foreword 9
Introduction 11
1 Teach Him How to Swaddle 13
2 Remember, It's Not a Competition 16
3 Never Say, "Can You Babysit the Kids?" 19
4 Don't Hide Your PPD Symptoms 21
5 Text Reminders 24
6 Encourage His Hobbies 27
7 Encourage Him to Revisit Dormant Talents 30
8 Ask the Right Question at the Right Time 33
9 Never Say, "Wait Until Your Father Gets Home" 35
10 Get Him Talking to Other Dads 39
11 Get Advice from Other Moms 42
12 Remember That Even Infants and Toddlers Need Dad 45
13 Support the New Dad Bond 48
14 Recognize the New Dad Blues 52
15 Bookmark Psalm 127 55
16 Buy Him Dad Stuff 59
17 Rescue Your Weekends 62
18 Let Him Know If You Want to Stay Home with the Kids 66
19 Make a Second Superman Suit 70
20 Make Sure the Kids Know What Dad Does 73
21 Equip Him with Crisp White Handkerchiefs 77
22 Activate Your Husband 79
23 Remind Him It's Just a Phase 83
24 Recalibrate His Smartphone Pics 85
25 Watch the Horizon Together 88
26 If He's Getting the Job Done, Let Him Know 93
27 Display a United Front 96
28 Help Him Understand Girls 100
29 Suggest the Road Trip 104
30 Pray for Him and with Him 107
31 Kiss Your Husband in the Kitchen 111
32 Expect to Get Your Signals Crossed 114
33 Make Your Home a Hangout 117
34 Don't Trash-Talk Him to Your Mom 120
35 Don't Be Surprised When Parenting Isn't Fifty-Fifty 123
36 Be Noble, But No Pressure: Part 1 126
37 Be Noble, But No Pressure: Part 2 130
38 Make Sure the Kids Respect Him 133
39 Find the Courage 136
40 Consider Your Own Father 138
41 Trick Him into Doing an Abbott and Costello Routine 141
42 Know Love Can Multiply 143
43 Send Him to the Perch 146
44 Expect Imperfection, Obviously 150
45 Be Glad He's There 153
46 Help Him Walk His Talk 155
47 Recruit Him to Be a "Room Mom" 159
48 Appreciate Your Differences 161
49 Realize It's Only a Season 164
50 Help Him Put First Things First 169
51 Humbly Take the Credit When He Receives Accolades 174
52 Point Out the Glory 177
Notes 181
What People are Saying About This
FOREWORD by Dannah GreshWe live in a fatherless period in time.
I think often of this verse from a fatherless time in ancient history. What a promise God made as the final ink on the last pages of the Old Testament began to dry:
He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers. (Malachi 4:6)
I’ve used this verse as a prayer in my home, asking God to make me the kind of mother who partners with God in turning the hearts of the Gresh children (and grandchildren) toward Bob! The kind of woman who turns Bob’s heart toward our children (and grandchildren). If your children, like mine, have an involved dad in their lives, they are blessed. Let’s be the kind of women who live as if we believe that!
My husband is what we call a Wolf Dad. He and I learned the term years ago from a mentor who was teaching us about parenting. You see, wolves co-parent, but they fulfill very different roles.
For the first six months of life, a litter of cubs stays in the den receiving nurture, nourishment, and protection from “mom.” During that time, if a cub attempts to wander from the den, she gently picks it up by the scruff of the neck and draws it deep back in. Her job is to keep the pups safe, teach them to groom themselves, and cuddle. Otherwise, they would not bond.
But after six months, “dad” steps in. He invites those cuddly pups out of the den. In fact, sometimes he pushes them out. With each invitation or push, the litter goes farther and farther with him. Eventually, they make it far enough to play a game of relay using sticks. His job is to teach them to take risks and to be hunters. Otherwise, they would not survive.
Bob and I believe that mothers and fathers, like co-parenting wolves, have different roles to play in the lives of children. We also believe that those differences should be celebrated and affirmed. Sadly, that’s not what many women do when their husband parent differently. When they act likes dads!
That’s why I’m so thankful for this book from Jay. He provides practical advice for wives and moms to celebrate and affirm the unique role a dad plays in a child’s development. This book will help you encourage your husband to move into his hero role in your family. That includes letting him parent differently. And, of course, it includes knowing when and how to practically help him or advise him.
From something as simple as teaching dads to swaddle a baby using the burrito fold to practical strategies for activating their strengths while overcoming their weaknesses, you have incredible opportunities to help your husband become the hero your children need. Jay Payleitner speaks from the perspective of personal experience and biblical truth to equip moms and encourage dads.
I’ve been following Jay for years, and I’m so thankful he has written this great book for women. Dive into the pages of it. It’ll help you become the kind of woman who turns the hearts of a father and his children toward one another!
Dannah Gresh, author of Six Ways to Keep the Little in Your Girl and Six Ways to Keep the Good in Your Boy; founder, True Girl“Jay Payleitner’s latest book is a joy to read. It’s written in his usual common sense, humorous style with just a touch of panache. Not only will moms benefit from this book, but I’m betting many dads will thank him as well. Frankly, as a fellow author I’m always a bit envious of just how good Jay’s books really are.”—Rick Johnson, bestselling author of That’s My Son“Moms Bringing Out the Best in Dads is filled with simple, uncomplicated reminders. As a mom, I learned that words are important, but actions and decisions can shout, ‘I love you! I respect you! I appreciate you! Prayer for your spouse, your children, and yourself can bring out the best in everyone.”—Kendra Smiley, author of Journey of a Strong-Willed Child“Moms and dads have different ways of parenting, but both are critical to a child’s upbringing. Jay shows how moms and dads can help each other be the best parents possible—not through competition but through coparenting.”—Eric Carroll, Dad Talk Today“Reading Jay’s book has given me a whole new vocabulary to use with my husband! Packed with creative ideas and heartwarming stories, this book will help you appreciate your husband and make him feel respected as a dad. Your wild support of your husband is one of the greatest gifts you can give your kids.”—Arlene Pellicane, author of 31 Days to a Happy Husband and host of The Happy Home podcast“As dads seem demeaned on every level, Moms Bringing Out the Best in Dads is refreshing and inspiring. Jay is so sensitive and gracious as he encourages moms to bring out the best in dads without belittling either parent. His humor, wisdom, and practical and biblical truths are priceless.”—Dr. Clarence Shuler, president of Building Lasting Relationships“Get ready…Jay is about to reveal to you what your children’s father might never have the courage to say. With honesty, humor, and a heart for the next generation, Jay offers wisdom—and even gentle warnings—to help spouses experience the best that parenting has to offer. Perhaps the best part about his book, though, is that he presents what he’s asking you to do not as a chore but as an exciting challenge, and even an adventure.”—Cindi McMenamin, author of When a Woman Inspires Her Husband“Jay has a unique way of marrying genuine wisdom with down-to-earth insights for family living. In this book he gives wives dozens of practical tools they can begin using today in order to help their husbands be the best dads possible. The backdrop is the reminder that couples are on the same team and working toward the shared goal of raising healthy, well-loved children. Wives will find themselves motivated to begin putting these ideas into practice.”—Kim Caifano, writer and speaker“As someone who deals with the devastating consequences of fatherlessness every day, I am ecstatic to find a book that will enable wives to help their husbands thrive. Jay Payleitner’s love for fatherhood, family, and marriage flows off every page. Using touching anecdotes, dad-joke humor, and biblical truth, his wisdom will gently take up residence in your heart. Romantic (“Kiss Him in the Kitchen”) as well as practical (“Recalibrate His Smartphone Pics”), Mom’s Bringing Out the Best in Dads is a toolkit, compass, and roadmap every wife needs.”—Ron Hauenstein, founder and CEO, Spokane Fatherhood Initiative