My Inflatable Friend: The Confessions of Rollo Hemphill

Trying to make your girlfriend jealous with a life-sized rubber doll might be a bad idea.

A reformed hacker-turned-slacker, twenty-something Rollo Hemphill fantasizes about becoming a top-forty DJ. Unfortunately, he has more talent than ambition. He's settled for a menial job as a car jockey at "The Wuthering Palms," a luxury hotel in Beverly Hills.
 
Proximity to all that glitz and glamour soon stirs his attraction to Felicia Ferrulo, the Sicilian hottie who works in the hotel beauty shop. When Felicia doesn't give him a nod, much less a chance, Rollo devises a desperate plan. It involves dressing up a life-sized doll to look like one of the hotel's reclusive megastar residents and conspicuously driving the fake woman around town in borrowed vehicles.
 
Inspiring jealousy is his goal, but it quickly gets waaaaaaay out of hand. Rollo's clever scheme backfires with stunning success, causing him to fall upward with dizzying speed - as he rockets toward the stars but away from the girl of his dreams.
 
Rollo's fumbling attempts to undo his tangled web is, by turns, pathetic and hysterically funny. My Inflatable Friend is a witty, cautionary tale about the perils of pretending to be someone you're not - and the hazards of stroking every male's most private and vulnerable part - his swelling ego!


 -


"Fast, funny, and sufficiently out there to be banned in Pasadena. Check with your doctor before reading." - Peter Lefcourt, author of The Woody and The Manhattan Beach Project 


"While the entire story is built on the most unbelievable and unrealistic of scenarios, this book is not intended to aim for an award in journalism. What it is, however, is an entrée into the land of the ridiculous, and I just couldn’t stop laughing. An extremely humorous, excruciatingly funny account of one poor soul as he attempts to win the heart of his beloved (whom he has never even gotten a first date with!). Hold onto your stomach because you’ll be laughing so hard you won’t be able to catch your breath!" - The International Review of Books


"Gentlemen, this is a book for every one of us that has had a glorious, highly sexual relationship, albeit imaginary, with the most beautiful woman in the world. Unbelievably funny, unexpected, and very challenging for our boy Rollo. An entertaining read... recommended for those who like a good laugh." - Dan Whitman, Allbooks Review


"Straddles the line between outright drawing-room silliness and romantic comedy... You may root for the charmingly dense Rollo." – Kirkus


"Should be read aloud before large groups for maximum effect. Do not invite your wife or girlfriend." - Marvin J. Wolf, co-writer, Ladies' Night, USA Networks


"Being single and on the make is tough enough when you've had some experience, even if it ended badly. But seeing poor Rollo go splat, it hurts so well when I laugh!" - Tom Blake, syndicated columnist, "Single Again," Orange County Register

1008544636
My Inflatable Friend: The Confessions of Rollo Hemphill

Trying to make your girlfriend jealous with a life-sized rubber doll might be a bad idea.

A reformed hacker-turned-slacker, twenty-something Rollo Hemphill fantasizes about becoming a top-forty DJ. Unfortunately, he has more talent than ambition. He's settled for a menial job as a car jockey at "The Wuthering Palms," a luxury hotel in Beverly Hills.
 
Proximity to all that glitz and glamour soon stirs his attraction to Felicia Ferrulo, the Sicilian hottie who works in the hotel beauty shop. When Felicia doesn't give him a nod, much less a chance, Rollo devises a desperate plan. It involves dressing up a life-sized doll to look like one of the hotel's reclusive megastar residents and conspicuously driving the fake woman around town in borrowed vehicles.
 
Inspiring jealousy is his goal, but it quickly gets waaaaaaay out of hand. Rollo's clever scheme backfires with stunning success, causing him to fall upward with dizzying speed - as he rockets toward the stars but away from the girl of his dreams.
 
Rollo's fumbling attempts to undo his tangled web is, by turns, pathetic and hysterically funny. My Inflatable Friend is a witty, cautionary tale about the perils of pretending to be someone you're not - and the hazards of stroking every male's most private and vulnerable part - his swelling ego!


 -


"Fast, funny, and sufficiently out there to be banned in Pasadena. Check with your doctor before reading." - Peter Lefcourt, author of The Woody and The Manhattan Beach Project 


"While the entire story is built on the most unbelievable and unrealistic of scenarios, this book is not intended to aim for an award in journalism. What it is, however, is an entrée into the land of the ridiculous, and I just couldn’t stop laughing. An extremely humorous, excruciatingly funny account of one poor soul as he attempts to win the heart of his beloved (whom he has never even gotten a first date with!). Hold onto your stomach because you’ll be laughing so hard you won’t be able to catch your breath!" - The International Review of Books


"Gentlemen, this is a book for every one of us that has had a glorious, highly sexual relationship, albeit imaginary, with the most beautiful woman in the world. Unbelievably funny, unexpected, and very challenging for our boy Rollo. An entertaining read... recommended for those who like a good laugh." - Dan Whitman, Allbooks Review


"Straddles the line between outright drawing-room silliness and romantic comedy... You may root for the charmingly dense Rollo." – Kirkus


"Should be read aloud before large groups for maximum effect. Do not invite your wife or girlfriend." - Marvin J. Wolf, co-writer, Ladies' Night, USA Networks


"Being single and on the make is tough enough when you've had some experience, even if it ended badly. But seeing poor Rollo go splat, it hurts so well when I laugh!" - Tom Blake, syndicated columnist, "Single Again," Orange County Register

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My Inflatable Friend: The Confessions of Rollo Hemphill

My Inflatable Friend: The Confessions of Rollo Hemphill

by Gerald Everett Jones
My Inflatable Friend: The Confessions of Rollo Hemphill

My Inflatable Friend: The Confessions of Rollo Hemphill

by Gerald Everett Jones

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Overview

Trying to make your girlfriend jealous with a life-sized rubber doll might be a bad idea.

A reformed hacker-turned-slacker, twenty-something Rollo Hemphill fantasizes about becoming a top-forty DJ. Unfortunately, he has more talent than ambition. He's settled for a menial job as a car jockey at "The Wuthering Palms," a luxury hotel in Beverly Hills.
 
Proximity to all that glitz and glamour soon stirs his attraction to Felicia Ferrulo, the Sicilian hottie who works in the hotel beauty shop. When Felicia doesn't give him a nod, much less a chance, Rollo devises a desperate plan. It involves dressing up a life-sized doll to look like one of the hotel's reclusive megastar residents and conspicuously driving the fake woman around town in borrowed vehicles.
 
Inspiring jealousy is his goal, but it quickly gets waaaaaaay out of hand. Rollo's clever scheme backfires with stunning success, causing him to fall upward with dizzying speed - as he rockets toward the stars but away from the girl of his dreams.
 
Rollo's fumbling attempts to undo his tangled web is, by turns, pathetic and hysterically funny. My Inflatable Friend is a witty, cautionary tale about the perils of pretending to be someone you're not - and the hazards of stroking every male's most private and vulnerable part - his swelling ego!


 -


"Fast, funny, and sufficiently out there to be banned in Pasadena. Check with your doctor before reading." - Peter Lefcourt, author of The Woody and The Manhattan Beach Project 


"While the entire story is built on the most unbelievable and unrealistic of scenarios, this book is not intended to aim for an award in journalism. What it is, however, is an entrée into the land of the ridiculous, and I just couldn’t stop laughing. An extremely humorous, excruciatingly funny account of one poor soul as he attempts to win the heart of his beloved (whom he has never even gotten a first date with!). Hold onto your stomach because you’ll be laughing so hard you won’t be able to catch your breath!" - The International Review of Books


"Gentlemen, this is a book for every one of us that has had a glorious, highly sexual relationship, albeit imaginary, with the most beautiful woman in the world. Unbelievably funny, unexpected, and very challenging for our boy Rollo. An entertaining read... recommended for those who like a good laugh." - Dan Whitman, Allbooks Review


"Straddles the line between outright drawing-room silliness and romantic comedy... You may root for the charmingly dense Rollo." – Kirkus


"Should be read aloud before large groups for maximum effect. Do not invite your wife or girlfriend." - Marvin J. Wolf, co-writer, Ladies' Night, USA Networks


"Being single and on the make is tough enough when you've had some experience, even if it ended badly. But seeing poor Rollo go splat, it hurts so well when I laugh!" - Tom Blake, syndicated columnist, "Single Again," Orange County Register


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780979486678
Publisher: LaPuerta Books and Media
Publication date: 09/19/2018
Series: Misadventures of Rollo Hemphill , #1
Sold by: PUBLISHDRIVE KFT
Format: eBook
Pages: 206
File size: 1 MB
Age Range: 16 Years

About the Author

Gerald Everett Jones holds a Bachelor of Arts with Honors from the College of Letters, Wesleyan University. He is the author of nine novels, most recently the mystery-thriller Preacher Finds a Corpse and the psychological literary novel Clifford's Spiral. He wrote a series of three satiric Rollo Hemphill misadventures, the adult melodrama Christmas Karma, the crime story Choke Hold, the father-son comedy Mr. Ballpoint, and the historical thriller Bonfire of the Vanderbilts. He coauthored the nonfiction memoir The Light in His Soul: Lessons from My Brother's Schizophrenia. He has also written more than 25 nonfiction books on business and technical subjects and is an award-winning screenwriter. He is a member of the Writers Guild of America, Women's National Book Association, Dramatists Guild, and the Independent Writers of Southern California. His business title How to Lie with Charts has become something of a classic on the subject of presentation design. He is the host of the GetPublished! Radio show.
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