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Surviving Suicide: One Mother's Journey to Acceptance After Her Son's Death

Surviving Suicide: One Mother's Journey to Acceptance After Her Son's Death

by Victoria Polmatier, Kerri Miller
Surviving Suicide: One Mother's Journey to Acceptance After Her Son's Death

Surviving Suicide: One Mother's Journey to Acceptance After Her Son's Death

by Victoria Polmatier, Kerri Miller


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Some things in life require we walk through fire to get to the other side. Surviving the suicide of your child is one of those things. In Surviving Suicide, Victoria Polmatier relates the agonizing first year of her life after her adult son’s death by suicide, looking back over his history of multiple suicide attempts and the amazing individual he could be in between. Full-color photography throughout the book demonstrates the many contradictions in Jason’s life. Victoria shares a journey through grief to acceptance and finding she could carry her love for her son and live her life fully once again.

Surviving Suicide explores how grief feels in the body and how it affects daily life, how Victoria’s son still touches her life and how she managed to embrace the surrender necessary to move on.

This book reflects the deep, all-consuming pain caused by suicide.  It can be a valuable aid to parents and provide needed information for friends, family, clergy and other support people of those who are grieving.

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780999344514
Publisher: Mystic Haven Press
Publication date: 09/12/2017
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: eBook
Pages: 97
File size: 23 MB
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About the Author

Victoria Polmatier is best known for her loving heart and laughter. She's happiest when with her family or writing a poem about life or when she has her hands in the dirt tending her herbs and garden. Victoria lives in Southwest Washington with her husband, their pets and a flock of chickens. She can be found on social media as "naturalvic" or her website at
Kerri Miller is a freelance editor who works with a wide range of clients, from books to blogs. A former English teacher, she also maintains a YouTube channel called ELA Academy, where she produces free educational videos for students and teachers in English language arts. She lives with her family, including two dogs, two cats, and a lot of fish, in the great state of Texas.

Table of Contents


I Will Always Love You



The Man of the Beautiful Mask

Start Writing Again

Black Hole of Despair

I’ve Learned, Day 11

No Tears

Life Goes On

Full Circle

Unexpected Tears

I’ve Learned, Day 23

The Tornado Has Ended


My Birthay

Grief’s Tears


I’ve Learned, Day 43

Dark Circles

Photo by Jason Williard

The Spider Runs Round and Round

Inspirations in a Bottle

What If I Love Again

Who You Are

Breakfast Remembered

Air Thick with Grief


Party Night

This Crazy Maze

I’ve Learned, Day

The Loss of My Son

Ebb and Flow

Grief’s Anger

What I Know

I Could Feel It

Two Worlds




Winter Cold


One Step At A Time

Crossing A Line

Ice Storm

Another Year

An Evening of Remembrance

Spring’s Stirring

Your Presence

The Spaces Between

The Darkness Surrounds Me

Returning to the Light

A Gathering of Family

Happy Birthday

Spring Forth

Grief Sucks

A Window in Time

Dispelling the Energy

His Civic Nature

Standing in the Midst

What Does Today Hold

No Do-Overs

Breaking Down Barriers

The Man Behind the Beautiful Mask

Good Mom?

Ponderings on Life Without Jason

A Nighttime Visit

This Roller Coaster Called Grief

Driving Down the Road

Warm Day Memories

Mother’s Day

Mr. Kitty’s Freedom

He Knew

Moving Forward

Black and White and Tuna Sandwiches

Choice Points

A Frame of Photos

Coming Home

Almost a Year

Some Things

In a Different Reality

I Was a Tormented Soul


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