The Paradox of Vertical Flight

Good morning! Today is Jack's eighteenth birthday. Here's what's happened so far-

He woke up from a dream about dissecting frogs and measuring the bubbles produced by llamas. He just missed a call from Bob, his grandmother. He's not sure she'll remember he exists-which makes him sad, because he really loves her. He's thought about jumping out of the window. Not because he wants to die, mind you, but some attention would be nice. He's had a nonsensical conversation with his roommate, who is s...