Unstuck: Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage

Unstuck: Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage

by Barry Ham

NOOK Book(eBook)

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780768408546
Publisher: Destiny Image, Inc.
Publication date: 02/16/2016
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: NOOK Book
File size: 881 KB

About the Author

Dr. Barry Ham is an educator in a variety of forms: as a college professor, an adolescent counselor, and as a Marriage and Family Therapist in practice in Colorado Springs. He has degrees in Ministry, Music, Psychology, Marriage and Family Counseling, and Clinical Psychology. He lives in the Colorado Springs area and has two grown children.

Table of Contents

Introduction 11

Chapter 1 The Ideal Plan 15

Chapter 2 How Did We Get Here? 31

Chapter 3 Going Under the Radar 49

Chapter 4 Throw in the Towel or Endure 65

Chapter 5 Commitment-A Different Approach 81

Chapter 6 Lessons from Success-Engagement 99

Chapter 7 The Critical Puzzle Piece 117

Chapter 8 Wild Blue Yonder 133

Chapter 9 Relearning the Dance 153

Chapter 10 Where Your Treasure Is 177

Chapter 11 Seasons of Change-Preparing for the Storm 195

Chapter 12 Remembering 209

Appendix 221

Notes 223

Acknowledgments 231

What People are Saying About This

From the Publisher

“Barry Ham has great passion for helping couples who have found marriage difficult.  For those who are stuck, this book offers practical help on how to get UNSTUCK.
I highly recommend it.”
Gary Chapman, Ph.D. author of The Five Love Languages
"Many couples in America today do not find themselves in deep trouble.  Nor, if pressed, do they find themselves at the highest precipice of joy.  If they were to sum up their marriage they might simply use one word - STUCK.  Drawing on a lifetime of therapeutic experience and Biblical insight, Barry Ham has written an extremely helpful book for couples in any stage of marital development.  This book will help you get - UNSTUCK.  Read it!"  
Graham Baird, Lead Pastor, Mission Street Church, Camarillo, California, and Author of One Hundred Years of Ministry.
"In this book Barry identifies many of the pitfalls that have contributed to marriages becoming stale and lifeless.  But more importantly, he offers clear guidelines and strategies to enable couples to reverse this trend, get unstuck, and experience the marriage that both they and God had in mind." 
HB London; Pastor to Pastor Emeritus-Focus on the Family. Author: Pastors at Greater Risk  
“Barry has dialed into the life journey of so many couples, including Christian couples, who really are “stuck” and only enduring year after year.  The raw honesty and clarity he has captured are both courageous and inviting.  But Barry’s response to these and other couples has helped them discover that their story isn’t over— they get to discover a new story of healing and restoration awaits them in the grace and truth that Jesus personally invites them into.”   
Brent Williams, Director of Pastoral Care Ministries, Woodmen Valley Chapel
“Dr. Ham really gets it… long term, intimate marriage is not based on emotions, but rather on commitment. Our generation has forgotten this fact, and Dr. Ham does an excellent job providing both insightful and practical suggestions for returning to this unavoidable truth. Following the roadmap in this book dramatically improves your chance of realizing your dream for a lifelong marriage.“
Craig Cato, Therapist and Author of Solo on a Tandem Bicycle

Customer Reviews

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Unstuck: Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage 4.8 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 4 reviews.
NKBookReviewer More than 1 year ago
"Unstuck: Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage" by author Barry D Ham, Ph. D. is a 234 page paperback. This Christian marriage book is written as encouragement for marriages that have grown stagnant or stuck in the doldrums. Using real life examples the author shows how various couples were able to get "unstuck" in their marriage. He uses suggestions on how to get closer to your spouse, communicate better, get your spark back, and stay committed. This is a biblically based book, and scripture is referred to often. At the end of his book the author has included scripture references that were mentioned in texts. In each chapter the author asks you to engage – to reflect, to talk about, and to take action. He has written an interactive study guide with unstuck that will offer insight and help for any marriage, fledgling or seasoned. Author Ham has a nice writing style that is easy to follow and understand. His chapters and book are well organized and researched. The personal stories were a great touch to hold readers' attention. The advice and tools given were practical and urged couples to keep trying to get unstuck rather than give up. The author stresses that couples need to put God at the center of their marriage in order for it to be successful. I would recommend this marriage guide to any marriage couple, especially one that feels their marriage needs some help. Even a couple with a good marriage will glean some ideas to use. This would make a nice book for a church library. I rated it a 5 out of 5 stars. A copy of "Unstuck" was provided by The Book Club Network for my honest review.
richardblake More than 1 year ago
Unstuck – Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage By: Barry D. Ham, P.H.D Destiny Image Publishers, Inc., P. O. Box 310, Shippensburg, PA 17257 978-0768408539, $ 15.99, 2016, 234 pages Reviewed by Richard R. Blake, richard330@yahoo.com Steps to Restoring Vibrancy, Energy, and Intimacy to a Troubled Marriage Relationship “Unstuck – Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage” offers hope and happiness to couples seeking to reconnect in an intimate and vital marriage relationship. Dr. Ham is a highly skilled communicator with a unique gift of storytelling. True stories, examples, and case studies come alive and identify real issues readily identifiable offering practical resolutions leading to a new commitment to reengaging, and infusing new life into the marriage relationship. Dr. Ham draws from his ministry and therapeutic experience as a marriage and family therapist to provide biblical insight, helpful guidelines, and workable strategies for couples seeking counsel. He writes with clarity and is forthright in his observations. His illustrations are matchless and will challenge the reader’s thinking and allow them to explore causes for disillusionment and to determine steps to pursue in their search for reawakening romance and a successful marriage. The book is extensively researched, well documented, and highly endorsed by recognized Christian leaders, professional therapists, and pastors. “Unstuck – Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage” is important reading for pastors, lay counselors, and for couples seeking recommitment, healing, and restoration in their marriage. A complimentary copy of this book was provided for review purposes. The opinions expressed are my own.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Unstuck: Escaping the Rut of a Lifeless Marriage by Barry D Ham, Ph. D is awesome. The author follows a couple from newlywed to life after their children are grown giving examples of the struggles they had, that so many couples experience. The authors points out the importance of commitment instead of enduring. I especially enjoyed the chapter “Relearning The Dance”. In this chapter he compared working on a marriage to learning how to dance. I liked the examples of look into her eyes, lead and protect, moving as one, and make each other look good. This is so true. This is such a good book. Even though a lot of people buying the book will do so because their marriage is not what they would like it to be, it would be a great book for every couple. I will be recommending this book to my friends, it is that good! I received a copy of the book from the author and Book Club Network for an honest review.
psoccermom More than 1 year ago
This book is a great resource for those who feel "stuck" in their marriage. It is also great to read for ideas on how to communicate with your spouse in different ways. We all need a little push sometimes. While reading this wonderful book I couldn't help but be brought back to a time when my husband and I were "Stuck". It has been a very long time ago but I will never forget how close I came to loosing the love of my life and best friend. Counseling was our life line as well as a closer relationship to God and family. This book gives you different couples and their stories how they worked through their differences and came out on the other side. I know everyone feels that this will never happen to me, I have the best marriage in the world. People need to realize that marriage is work and not something to neglect just like our relationship with God. I would recommend this book to people thinking about marriage and those that are married for a great resource. Always remember why you got married and have God at the center of your lives. At the end of this book there is a great section on all the biblical references that were mentioned in texts. I recieved this book from The BookClub Network for an honest review.