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From the team that brought you The Witch's Table comes another hilarious and charming story about what exactly makes a pirate a pirate!

I am a pirate, so I guess pirates do.

The crew aboard the Leaky Sneaker is filled with the piratey-est pirates ever to sail the seven seas. Which is why Captain Bogbrush has no idea what to do with Montague Frippington von Fancypants. Montague wears petticoats while sailing, takes pearl necklaces as booty, and politely plunders on raids. Pirates don't do that...