Beautiful

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More About This Book

Overview

Download a free excerpt of Beautiful.

When Cassie moves from the tiny town where she has always lived to a suburb of Seattle, she is determined to leave her boring, good-girl existence behind. This is Cassie's chance to stop being invisible and become the kind of girl who's worth noticing.

Stepping into her new identity turns out to be easier than Cassie could have ever imagined...one moment, one choice, will change everything.

Cassie's new existence both thrills and terrifies her. Swept into a world of illicit parties and social landmines, she sheds her virginity, embraces the numbness she feels from the drugs, and floats through it all, knowing that she is now called beautiful. She ignores the dangers of her fast-paced life?but she can't sidestep the secrets and the cruelty.

Cassie is trapped in a swift downward spiral tinged with violence and abuse, and no one—not even the one person she thought she could trust—can help her now.

?Beautiful is stark, disquieting and, quite simply, riveting. Amy Reed is an author to keep on your radar.? —Ellen Hopkins, bestselling author of Crank

?A latter-day Go Ask Alice, Beautiful is raw, gritty, and powerful, an intense ice-pick jab to the heart. A stunning debut and a must-read.? —R.A. Nelson, author of Teach Me

"In crisp, clean prose Amy Reed places the reader right into the heart and mind and life of a girl who makes the choice to be one of the beautiful ones. Reed gives a disturbing and concise snapshot of what it can be like today for teens struggling with self-identity and peer acceptance when in a heartbeat they follow the 'wrong road.'" —M. Sindy Felin, National Book Award Finalist forTouching Snow

Editorial Reviews

Children's Literature
Beautiful is a devastating look at the downward spiral of an adolescent girl seeking acceptance. Cassie has just moved from Bainbridge Island to Seattle. No one at her new school knows her as the pudgy nobody her classmates in her small town ignored. Here, now, she is beautiful and determined to be noticed. Her decisions, while terrifying for the reader, are perfectly understandable. Her parents are loving, but more involved in their own unhappiness than in keeping a close watch on Cassie. Her new friend Alex is her ticket into the world of drugs, sex, and acceptance, but Alex's personal demons become clearer and more dangerous as their friendship deepens. The first-person, present-tense voice keeps the reader constantly absorbed in Cassie's life and never sure what the next moment may bring. Through Cassie's eyes, we see how easy it is to fall and how brutal the world can really be. Though fear never loses its grip on Cassie or on the reader's attention, persistent hope is what keeps the pages turning. For all its rawness, the story itself is beautiful and vital. Reviewer: Jennifer Lehmann
School Library Journal
Gr 9 Up—Thirteen-year-old Cassie has bloomed. Following her family's move from an island off the coast of Washington to a Seattle suburb, she has a new attractiveness that earns her the moniker "the beautiful seventh grader." Her good looks and willingness to conform are a passport to her school's powerful clique of druggies led by Alex, a frightening but charismatic fellow seventh grader who adopts Cassie as her best friend. Cassie's compliance with Alex's demands—to burn photographs of former friends, to take acid, to have sex—secures her a position as Alex's second in command but threatens her health and safety. When Alex's half sister Sarah moves in with Alex and her wasted mother, Cassie finds her allegiance shifting from her best friend to Sarah. Reed's first novel owes a tremendous debt to Catherine Hardwicke's 2002 film Thirteen; however, where the filmic treatment of its 13-year-old heroines' dangerous experimentation is complicated by the richness of their characters and their interactions with one another and the supporting cast, this novel is less complex and more sensational. It is difficult to discern motivation for many of the characters, whose actions—Alex's in particular—are explained in almost clichéd form, and the secondary characters are one-dimensional.—Amy S. Pattee, Simmons College, Boston
More Reviews (2) Fewer Reviews
Kirkus Reviews
Thirteen-year-old Cassie makes a snap decision to reinvent her nerdy, unpopular self when she moves to a new school district in Seattle. When green-haired Alex invites-actually drags-her over to the table where the "dangerous" ninth-grade boys sit, she goes along. And from there she goes along, unresisting, with everything else: heavy drinking, constant use of myriad drugs, sexual encounters that she dislikes and theft. Her dysfunctional, self-absorbed parents are numb to her growing despair, which results from her out-of-control behavior. Cassie shows remarkable insight in her first-person narration, even through her drug-induced fog. When another teen, sexually abused by her father, falls under Alex's thrall and reaches out to Cassie for help, the seventh grader hits rock bottom. Rather than acting as a cautionary tale, this novel often seems to function more as a roadmap to a dark but realistic underworld of young unsupervised teens drifting from one unsavory experience to another. A conclusion that seems implausibly optimistic, considering the life Cassie's recently led, slaps a bandage on an oozing sore. (Fiction. 14 & up)
VOYA
In this sad, dark book with pain-filled characters, thirteen-year-old Cassie is the new girl at school trying to recreate herself. During her transition, she is attracted to Alex, an intimidating, abusive manipulator who leads Cassie into boys, drugs, and sex. Cassie goes willingly, but during her first sexual experience, she watches from the ceiling in an out-of-body experience and later showers in scalding water—both common to rape victims. Frail and fading, Sarah, Alex's half-sister, has been sexually abused by her father since she was little—the scars prove the abuse Sarah does not remember. Messed-up and absent in her own life, Cassie wants to protect Sarah. The target audience is questionable with a main character of thirteen; most middle schools will not teach this book, and high school students rarely read about thirteen year olds. The gift in this book is Reed's ability to find the perfect words and use them in ways for which the reader is not ready. The writing is lonely, haunting, sensuous, and oddly beautiful. Reviewer: C. J. Bott

Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9781416978312
  • Publisher: Simon Pulse
  • Publication date: 10/5/2010
  • Pages: 256
  • Sales rank: 66,459
  • Age range: 14 - 17 Years
  • Lexile: HL800L (what's this?)
  • Product dimensions: 5.50 (w) x 8.10 (h) x 0.80 (d)

Meet the Author


Amy Reed was born and raised in and around Seattle, where she attended a total of eight schools by the time she was eighteen. Constant moving taught her to be restless and being an only child made her imagination do funny things. After a brief stint at Reed College (no relation), she moved to San Francisco and spent the next several years serving coffee and getting into trouble. She eventually graduated from film school, promptly decided she wanted nothing to do with filmmaking, returned to her original and impractical love of writing, and earned her MFA from New College of California. Amy currently lives in Oakland with her husband and two cats, and has accepted that Northern California has replaced the Pacific Northwest as her home. She is no longer restless. Find out more at amyreedfiction.com or follow her on Twitter at @amyreedfiction.

Read an Excerpt


(ONE)

I don’t see her coming.

I am looking at my piece of pizza. I am watching pepperoni glisten. It is my third day at the new school and I am sitting at a table next to the bathrooms. I am eating lunch with the blond girls with the pink sweaters, the girls who talk incessantly about Harvard even though we’re only in seventh grade. They are the kind of girls who have always ignored me. But these girls are different than the ones on the island. They think I am one of them.

She grabs my shoulder from behind and I jump. I turn around. She says, “What’s your name?”

I tell her, “Cassie.”

She says, “Alex.”

She is wearing an army jacket, a short jean skirt, fishnet stockings, and combat boots. Her hair is shoulder length, frizzy and green. She’s tall and skinny, not skinny like a model but skinny like a boy. Her blue eyes are so pale they don’t look human and her eyelashes and eyebrows are so blond they’re almost white. She is not pretty, not even close to pretty. But there’s something about her that’s bigger than pretty, something bigger than smart girls going to Harvard.

It’s only my third day, but I knew the second I got here that this place was different. It is not like the island, not a place ruled by good girls. I saw Alex. I saw the ninth grade boys she hangs out with, their multicolored hair, their postures of indifference, their clothes that tell everybody they’re too cool to care. I heard her loud voice drowning everything out. I saw how other girls let her cut in front of them in line. I saw everyone else looking at her, looking at the boys with their lazy confidence, everyone looking and trying not to be seen.

I saw them at the best table in the cafeteria and I decided to change. It is not hard to change when you were never anything in the first place. It is not hard to put on a T-shirt of a band you overheard the cool kids talking about, to wear tight jeans with holes, to walk by their table and make sure they see you. All it takes is moving off an island to a suburb of Seattle where no one knows who you were before.

“You’re in seventh grade.” She says this as a statement.

“Yes,” I answer.

The pink-sweater girls are looking at me like they made a big mistake.

“Where are you from?” she says.

“Bainbridge Island.”

“I can tell,” she says. “Come with me.” She grabs my wrist and my plastic fork drops. “I have some people who want to meet you.”

I’m supposed to stand up now. I’m supposed to leave the pizza and the smart girls and go with the girl named Alex to the people who want to meet me. I cannot look back, not at the plate of greasy pizza and the girls who were almost my friends. Just follow Alex. Keep walking. One step. Two steps. I must focus on my face not turning red. Focus on breathing. Stand up straight. Remember, this is what you want.

The boys are getting bigger. I must pretend I don’t notice their stares. I cannot turn red. I cannot smile the way I do when I’m nervous, with my cheeks twitching, my lips curled all awkward and lopsided. I must ignore the burn where Alex holds my wrist too tight. I cannot wonder why she’s holding my wrist the way she does, why she doesn’t trust me to walk on my own, why she keeps looking back at me, why she won’t let me out of her sight. I cannot think of maybes. I cannot think of “What if I turned around right now? What if I went the other way?” There is no other way. There is only forward, with Alex, to the boys who want to meet me.

I am slowing down. I have stopped. I am looking at big sneakers on ninth grade boys. Legs attached. Other things. Chests, arms, faces. Eyes looking. Droopy, red, big-boy eyes. Smiles. Hands on my shoulders. Pushing, guiding, driving me.

“James, this is Cassie, the beautiful seventh grader,” Alex says. Hair shaved on the side, mohawk in the middle, face pretty and flawless. This one’s the cutest. This one’s the leader.

“Wes, this is Cassie, the beautiful seventh grader.” Pants baggy, legs spread, lounging with arms open, baby-fat face. Not a baby, dangerous. He smiles. They all smile.

Jackson, Anthony. I remember their names. They say, “Sit down.” I do what they say. Alex nods her approval.

I must not look up from my shoes. I must pretend I don’t feel James’s leg touching mine, his mouth so close to my ear. Don’t see Alex whispering to him. Don’t feel the stares. Don’t hear the laughing. Just remember what Mom says about my “almond eyes,” my “dancer’s body,” my “high cheekbones,” my “long neck,” my hair, my lips, my breasts, all of the things I have now that I didn’t have before.

“Cassie,” James says, and my name sounds like flowers in his mouth.

“Yes.” I look at his chiseled chin. I look at his teeth, perfect and white. I do not look at his eyes.

“Are you straight?” he says, and I compute in my head what this question might mean, and I say, “Yes, well, I think so,” because I think he wants to know if I like boys. I look at his eyes and know I have made a mistake. They are green and smiling and curious, wanting me to answer correctly. He says, “I mean, are you a good girl? Or do you do bad things?”

“What do you mean by bad things?” is what I want to say, but I don’t say anything. I just look at him, hoping he cannot read my mind, cannot smell my terror, will not now realize that I do not deserve this attention, that he’s made a mistake by looking at me in this not-cruel way.

“I mean, I noticed you the last couple of days. You seemed like a good girl. But today you look different.”

It is true. I am different from what I was yesterday and all the days before that.

“So, are you straight?” he says. “I mean, do you do drugs and stuff?”

“Yeah, um, I guess so.” I haven’t. I will. Yes. I will do anything he wants. I will sit here while everyone stares at me. I will sit here until the bell rings and it is time to go back to class and the girl named Alex says, “Give me your number,” and I do.

• • •

Even though no one else talks to me for the rest of the day, I hold on to “beautiful.” I hold on to lunch tomorrow at the best table in the cafeteria. Even though I ride the bus home alone and watch the marina and big houses go by, there are ninth grade boys somewhere who may be thinking about me.

Even though Mom’s asleep and Dad’s at work, even though there are still boxes piled everywhere from the move, even though Mom’s too sad to cook and I eat peanut butter for dinner, and Dad doesn’t come home until the house is dark, and the walls are too thin to keep out the yelling, even though I can hear my mom crying, there is a girl somewhere who has my number. There are ninth grade boys who will want it. There are ninth grade boys who may be thinking about me, making me exist somewhere other than here, making me something bigger than the flesh in the corner of this room. There is a picture of me in their heads, a picture of someone I don’t know yet. She is not the chubby girl with the braces and bad perm. She is not the girl hiding in the bathroom at recess. She is someone new, a blank slate they have named beautiful. That is what I am now: beautiful, with this new body and face and hair and clothes. Beautiful, with this erasing of history.

© 2009 Amy Reed

Customer Reviews

Average Rating 4
( 146 )

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See All Sort by: Showing 1 – 20 of 147 Customer Reviews

  • Posted August 18, 2009

    So Beautiful

    My mother was a librarian, and sometime in the summer of 1973, she handed me a novel that upset, intrigued, and convinced me so fully, I almost refused to go to middle school. She didn't really give the novel to me. She shoved it into my hands, insisting that I read it. That book was the novel Go Ask Alice, purportedly based on a teenager's diary. The story is, as we all know now, a vivid cautionary tale about drugs and their rabbit hole allure.
    But really, the most frightening aspect of that novel was that I understood completely why "Alice" wanted to be other, different, new. Her need made sense. It could be me. It would be me if I didn't watch out.
    It took me a few years to get over the reading of that novel, but when I opened to the first page of the novel Beautiful by Amy Reed, I was right back in my young self, reading Go Ask Alice for the first time. From the first pages of Beautiful, I was shouting to myself, "No! Stop. Turn around. You don't need Alex. Don't go with Alex. Stop."
    But the main character Cassie has to follow that white rabbit down the hole. This is her journey. This is the hole she has to fall into, taking us with her. And we want to go. Not really. Okay, yes, we do. We have no choice. Her loneliness and despair are ours or could be ours. Reed writes with clarity and a sure knowing of how damn bad that adolescent life can be.
    Cassie is the smart, formerly ugly "loser" who wants to change but then changes in a way she never imagined possible. We can only hope that as with the Lewis Carroll Alice, Cassie wakes up, wiser but no worse for wear.
    Reed writes with an immediate, first person present tense tsunami of adolescent pain and confusion. Cassie's story is one we understand but wish we didn't have to. But because we do understand, we want to follow Cassie all the way through to the truly climactic end.
    How easy it is for us to simply move onto a path that is wrong. At age 13, it is even easier, especially if the family system is broken, the child unmoored. Reading Reed's story might shake up a reader, much as Go Ask Alice did me. But that book and Beautiful are so worth the ride.

    14 out of 16 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted June 19, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    Inspirational

    "Beautiful" is not just a good book to me, it's a treasure..I used to be a lot like the main character,Cassie. I got into the wrong crowd of people and my life began to fall apart. I was hanging out behind my school when my english teacher came up to me and handed me something...it was this book. I said, "What the hell is this? I don't have time to waste on this reading crap." She told me I had to read something, just one book to pass junior year. I threw the book to the side as she walked away..but when she was gone I picked it up and opened it. I never realized how the constant parties and trips to the basement were impacting my life...I always thought it was normal because everyone else was doing it. I liked having my head full of clouds. I liked feeling free and light....because if i couldn't think clearly then I was safe from all my problems..but this book made me realize that I was only hurting myself and the people around me....I didn't know their was a way out...but Amy Reed showed me that I didn't have to always be unconcious for my problems to go away.."Beautiful" saved me and I'm sure it will continue to save many more young girls..This is a must read book...

    7 out of 8 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted February 24, 2010

    I Also Recommend:

    9781595141491 9781595141712

    unforgettable

    i just read this book a month ago and have read 3 since then. but my mind has only been on this one. the book is like a painting it paints every detail of Cassie's captivating life and i really felt what she felt. this book is one word; UNFORGETTABLE!

    5 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted February 8, 2010

    more from this reviewer

    I Also Recommend:

    9781416940913 9781416914631 9780689865190

    This book is crazy!

    When I first started reading this book I thought it was going to only be about drugs, but I quickly realized I was wrong. It pretty much goes over almost every possible teen problem. Rape, eating disorders, etc. This book was extremly well written. The only things that bugged me were that I couldn't figure out when this book took place (Some things just didn't seem like it's from around this day, like some of the clothes Alex wears and Cassie complains about how her boyfriend calls his sweatshirts sweaters, but kids today call sweatshirts with zippers hoodies.. little things like that) and I don't understand after all that how she was able to write that to the red-haired girl in the end. I guess I'm just a person that dwells on things. Anyway, This book was amazing and I haven't had this many emotions about a book since I read Go Ask Alice.

    5 out of 7 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted December 28, 2010

    <3

    It was a little graphic.. but it was a very good book and I finished it in one day because of how amazing it was! :)

    4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted January 15, 2012

    Great

    Very grabing loved it

    3 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 3, 2011

    Shocking twist!!!!!!!

    This book was so sad. And to know that some kids are goong through this...... great book though

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 2, 2011

    I Also Recommend:

    9781416950066 9781416940913 9781416978312 9781416903574 9780689865190

    Highly Recommended - Beautiful

    This book is pure genius. It is simply stark. Beautiful.
    Once you start, you cannot stop. At certain parts

    2 out of 3 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted April 26, 2011

    amazing...but!

    THis book was intense and left me speechless, i ended up yelling at her to go the other way. the only thing i didnt like was her age i mean i think she should have been a year or two older, But anyway you have to read this book, it pulls you right in. the whole time i was reading this book i felt like i was right there next to her. this book taught me to be myself and dont be anyone your not.

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted March 13, 2011

    not good

    i could hardly get through this book. it really had no point and the ending was very bleak. dont let kids read this

    2 out of 11 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted January 20, 2012

    Amazing.

    People should realize, it's raw. It gets down deep into the lives of people who've been into drugs. Somebody said it wasn't realistic? At my age, I was in her position. Not a virgin, involved with drugs. It goes into all that and some people can't handle it. It is very realistic and raw and gritty. The characters are so outspoken and well written, I actually *hate* Cassie. Cassie is a horrible person, but when I was her age I acted like her. So many of us know somebody like Cassie but don't even know it.

    I definitely recommend this to a teen, it's explicit but it will show you not to get into drugs and sex at such a young age. It will teach you a life lesson.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted December 17, 2011

    .

    .

    1 out of 6 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 27, 2011

    Amazing

    This book is amazing. This tells you really what ppl do to fit in and how life can change. It was the truth(da truth)! :)

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 22, 2011

    Loved it


    1 out of 5 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 16, 2011

    AGE?

    How old should you be to read this book?

    1 out of 7 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 8, 2011

    This could be a very good book but for adults not children. But i believe it was a good story overall.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 21, 2011

    You should be like 15

    :) its really good!

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted August 5, 2011

    Great

    Graeat

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted June 4, 2011

    Holly crap!

    This book changed my life. I think this could be one of my fav book. It just so.... amazing! Words can not describe how much i love this book!

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted March 28, 2011

    Amazing

    somepeople may find it way to graphic but it was one of the mist amazing books ive ever read. the sex. drugs arent, the whole point. the poin was howmuch t tok over her life and hiw a normal life is the bet to wish. it was using sarah as a way of proving that there aee things tha addictikn cat coe before, things you dont realize till it its gone. besides i like the way the book tells it th way it is!

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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