DAVID J. LIEBERMAN, Ph.D., is an award-winning author and internationally recognized leader in the fields of human behavior and interpersonal relationships. Techniques based on his ten books, which have been translated into 24 languages and include two New York Times bestsellers, are used by governments, corporations, and mental health professionals in more than 25 countries. Dr. Lieberman's work has been featured in publications around the world, and he has appeared as a guest expert on more than 200 programs, such as: The Today Show, The Montel Williams Show, The O Reilly Factor, NPR, and The View. Dr. Lieberman lectures and holds workshops around the country across a spectrum of industries.
Setting Boundaries with Difficult Peopleby David Lieberman
A work colleague with whom you have only a casual relationship asks you to co-sign a loan for him . . . your neighbor asks you to keep her antisocial, flea-riddled cat for the
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The New York Times Bestselling author, Dr. David J. Lieberman, introduces a wonderful right-to-the-point book that shows readers how to put an end to boundary issues once and for all!
A work colleague with whom you have only a casual relationship asks you to co-sign a loan for him . . . your neighbor asks you to keep her antisocial, flea-riddled cat for the weekend — again. We've all faced sticky situations like these — unreasonable demands on our time and inappropriate requests from family, friends, co-workers or casual acquaintances. We want to say No. We have the right to say No — always. And yet we don't.
Maybe you tell yourself that you don’t want to make waves or ruffle feathers, or that it’s simply not worth it; but part of you simmers with anger and frustration that you didn’t speak up and do something— anything.
Isn't it ironic how a two-year-old can bark a resounding and guilt-free NO! without batting an eye, yet we grown-ups often find ourselves saying Yes when we mean to say No? Or we say "Let me think about it . . .” and agonize for weeks over how to say, inevitably, No.
We've all had our share of freeloaders, mooches, encroachers, interlopers, high-maintenance acquaintances — many of whom are repeat offenders. We've all had to deal with people who ask for favors that are inappropriate or unreasonable because they exceed the boundaries of our relationship with them. And we think, Why doesn't he realize he's crossing the line? The answer is: Because he doesn't know where the line is, or he doesn't care. The problem, as you're about to learn, is leaky boundaries. Some people have such permeable, poorly-defined boundaries that they have no concept of where they end and you begin.
Some people will take No for an answer and that's the end of it. But some people don't. What do you do when the person on the other end of your No flat out refuses to accept your No?
You'll discover exactly what to say as well as learn the underlying psychology that motivates them to always ask, and you to always give in!
- Viter Press
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