The Love and Respect Experience: A Husband-Friendly Devotional That Wives Truly Love

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Overview

A Devotional Unlike Any Other!

Through the millions of products sold on Love & Respect, Emerson Eggerichs has transformed marriages around the world with his biblically based approach to understanding the love that she most desires and the respect that he desperately needs. Now, in this long-awaited release, Emerson has created an experience for couples that is effective, flexible and life-changing.

To build this couples devotional, ...

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The Love and Respect Experience: A Husband-Friendly Devotional That Wives Truly Love

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Overview

A Devotional Unlike Any Other!

Through the millions of products sold on Love & Respect, Emerson Eggerichs has transformed marriages around the world with his biblically based approach to understanding the love that she most desires and the respect that he desperately needs. Now, in this long-awaited release, Emerson has created an experience for couples that is effective, flexible and life-changing.

To build this couples devotional, Eggerichs has taken the top concerns that surfaced in a survey of thousands of couples and has developed 52 devotionals around the three cycles that are at the heart of Love and Respect. On one occasion the couple will be talking about how to stop the Crazy Cycle or keep it at bay. The very next devotional will talk about a concept built upon the Rewarded Cycle, which stresses the ultimate purpose for marriage. And the next may have both people talking about ways to use the Energizing Cycle in their efforts to love and respect each other.

Some may ask, “Why 52 and not 365, like other couples devotionals I have seen?” The author’s research shows that married couples don’t want to deal with that much material, that often. Therefore, the specific devotionals, which can be done weekly or at any chosen pace, are specifically guided to what couples say they most need. And this is a husband-friendly devotional, having been written and designed in such a way that the husband can feel comfortable in the entire process.

With this wealth of new material and video devotionals available online to support the product, The Love & Respect Experience will be indispensable to anyone wishing to better their marital relationship.

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Product Details

  • ISBN-13: 9780849948176
  • Publisher: Nelson, Thomas, Inc.
  • Publication date: 10/11/2011
  • Format: Leather Bound
  • Pages: 320
  • Sales rank: 341,532
  • Product dimensions: 6.06 (w) x 9.54 (h) x 0.86 (d)

Meet the Author

Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, an internationally known expert on male-female relationships, presents the Love & Respect conference with his wife, Sarah, both live and by video to more than 50,000 people each year, including groups such as the NFL, PGA, and members of congress. With degrees from Wheaton College and Dubuque Seminary and a PhD from Michigan State, Emerson pastored Trinity Church in Lansing for 19 years. He and Sarah have been married since 1973 and have three children.

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Read an Excerpt

The Love & Respect Experience

A Husband-Friendly Devotional that Wives Truly Love
By Emerson Eggerichs

Thomas Nelson

Copyright © 2011 Emerson Eggerichs
All right reserved.

ISBN: 978-0-8499-4817-6


Chapter One

And They Lived Happily Ever After ... Not Necessarily

Proverbs 24:16:

For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again.

One of our chief concerns at Love and Respect is not that people hear the message, important as that is, but that couples who attend a conference or read the book will go on to practice love and respect effectively in their daily lives. Of course, I realize each couple has this very same concern, and that's why my heart goes out to those I hear from who "get it" but who aren't able to "stay with it" consistently. They have learned that Love & Respect sounds simple, but it's not so easy to do. Maybe "not natural" is a better phrase. I understand. Sarah and I don't find it easy or natural either, and we have conducted Love & Respect conferences over two hundred times during the last ten years!

These are some of the many confessions I've heard from spouses who are struggling:

• "I'm desperately praying for the Holy Spirit to help me change and be a more respectful wife. It hasn't been easy though, and I fail much more often than not."

• "Love & Respect works great when we are practicing it, but we are not consistent. It's hard not to fall back into old patterns. I am so defensive it isn't funny."

• "I am continuously amazed at how quickly we can go for a spin on the Crazy Cycle. I want to cry thinking how my level of knowledge far outweighs my level of obedience."

At this point you may be wondering: Why is Emerson starting this book with such bad news from couples who fail? How can this help us?

Hear me out. I am not trying to discourage you; I want to encourage you by saying right up front that Love & Respect is not a magic bullet. You will try it and find that you won't always practice it perfectly. To realize this truth and use it is a great source of strength and power. I love Proverbs 24:16 because it gives me such hope. Good people are not perfect, but God says: "A righteous man [or woman] falls seven times, and rises again." And how do you "rise again"? Here are three guidelines:

1. Never give up. If you want to have a strong marriage, you need to accept temporary setbacks as part of the game. In baseball terms, keep stepping back up to the plate. According to the baseball statisticians, even Hall of Famers fail to get a hit seven out of ten times. And Babe Ruth, perhaps the greatest slugger of all time, struck out over thirteen hundred times, more than anyone of his day!

2. Seek forgiveness from God and your spouse. A wife writes: "I failed to communicate respect to my husband. I've asked the Lord to forgive me, and I am preparing an e-mail to ask my husband to forgive me as well." A husband reports: "I know now how I failed as a husband, friend, and lover, and I've asked God and my wife for forgiveness." Ephesians 4:32 says it all: "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you" (NIV). Sarah and I often find ourselves turning to each other and saying, "I'm sorry—again."

3. Ask God to take your hand. Psalm 37:24 promises that though you stumble, you will not fall, for the Lord will uphold you with His hand. We need God's helping hand, and it's always there for us, if we ask Him humbly and confidently for guidance.

The storybook ending is always, "And they lived happily ever after." We know that's not really true because the slips, the bumps, and the falls do come in crazy ways. Life is not a matter of attaining some kind of marital nirvana. "Living happily ever after" means knowing how to deal with the imperfect parts of life—not accepting them with resignation but dealing with them through God's forgiveness and help and always getting back up when you fall. In a very real sense, the rest of this book is about just that, as you and your spouse will discover as you mine the riches of Love & Respect.

PRAYER: thank the Lord for his forgiveness, his grace, and the righteousness that only he can bestow. Thank him for his promise that though the righteous fall, they can rise again and continue to build a strong marriage with love and respect. Ask God to put it in your heart to refuse to let defeat defeat you.

ACTION: Make personalized copies of proverbs 24:16 that say, "For a righteous spouse falls seven times, and rises again," and put them up on bathroom mirrors, inside cupboard doors, and in other places where you will see them every day. (For discussion questions, see page 215 in appendix A.)

Chapter Two

Pink and Blue: Not Wrong, Just Different!

Genesis 5:2:

He created them male and female, and He blessed them.

One of the most powerful and eye-opening concepts in the Love & Respect approach to marriage is the difference between Pink and Blue. We aren't talking about how to decorate a nursery. We are simply pointing out how God made men and women as different as the colors pink and blue. I use the simple analogy that the woman looks at the world through Pink sunglasses that color all she sees. The man, however, looks at the world through Blue sunglasses that color all he sees. Men and women can look at precisely the same situation and see life very differently. Inevitably, their Pink and Blue lenses cause their interpretation of things to be at odds, in some cases more so than others.

Men and women not only see differently, but they also hear differently. To carry the Pink and Blue analogy a little further, God created men with Blue hearing aids and women with Pink hearing aids. They may hear the same words but receive very different messages, as in the statement "I have nothing to wear!" She hears nothing new, while he hears nothing clean.

Because men and women figuratively wear sunglasses and hearing aids in different colors, they see, hear, and behave differently in countless ways: When she wants to talk face-to-face and he wants her to sit next to him and watch football, this is a Pink and Blue difference. When she wants their ten-year-old son to be more careful riding his bike and he wants his boy to ride that bike the way he himself did when he was ten, this is a Pink and Blue difference. When she wants to clean the kitchen, launder the sheets, and vacuum the carpet right away and he wants her to forgo these chores to play with him and the kids, this is a Pink and Blue difference.

Many couples arrive at our conferences suffering from "color blindness" regarding the profound impact the principle of Pink and Blue has on marriage, but when they leave, their color blindness is gone. They make observations like these:

• "I never saw that before. I thought we were the same."

• "Now I understand how men and women are 'wired' differently and why it takes a lot of work to learn about each other's needs."

• "I am able to view conflict totally differently now. Instead of seeing my husband as an egotistical maniac, I have some peace and confidence about who God made me to be and who God made him to be, and I'm not feeling so frustrated about our differences."

Refusing to get frustrated is the key. Genesis 1:27 tells us that God made us in His image, and Genesis 5:2 adds that He blessed what He made. When differences arise (and they always will), remember this is part of God's plan. Neither one of you is wrong, just different. A major step toward a happy marriage is accepting differences and working them out with love and respect. Relax—and even rejoice. Vive la différence!

PRAYER: thank the Lord that in the very beginning he created male and female—Blue and pink. Ask him for patience and ever-growing understanding of how men and women see and hear differently.

ACTION: When the Crazy Cycle threatens to spin over a pink and Blue difference of opinion, try saying things like, "here, put on my pink sunglasses so you can see what I see," or "here, try my Blue hearing aids so you can hear what I just heard." (For discussion questions, see page 216 in appendix a.)

Chapter Three

Do You Have a Goodwilled Marriage?

Proverbs 11:27:

He who seeks good finds goodwill, but evil comes to him who searches for it (NIV).

I am sometimes asked what I think is the most important principle we teach. Pink and Blue (not wrong, just different) comes to mind, but so does one simple word: goodwill. When you and your spouse see each other as goodwilled, good things are in store for your marriage.

When they first hear the word goodwill, people have questions: Just what is goodwill? How can I know I am showing goodwill toward my spouse? How can I be sure my spouse has goodwill toward me?

A simple definition of goodwill is "the intention to do good toward another person." But the challenge often comes in when one spouse does something to the other spouse that does not feel "good," loving or respectful as the case may be. It is often just a "little thing" but still enough to get the Crazy Cycle revving up. At moments like these, the "offendee" has to cut the "offender" some slack, as in giving him or her the "goodwill benefit of the doubt."

A number of verses confirm that goodwill is a biblical idea. See, for example, Proverbs 14:9, Philippians 1:15, and Ephesians 6:7. And Paul is surely talking about the concept of goodwill in 1 Corinthians 7:33–34 when he warns that husbands and wives can become so concerned about pleasing each other that they can be distracted from serving Christ as they should. Granted, husbands and wives don't always demonstrate that natural desire to please each other as well as they might, but their goodwill is real nonetheless.

That's why today's passage is so important. When there is conflict, disagreement, or a bump of some kind, don't automatically conclude that your partner has ill will toward you. If you look for evil (offense), you can find it every time. Do that and the Crazy Cycle will spin for sure.

What Proverbs 11:27 is saying to the married couple is this: look for the good in your spouse (even though it seems to be lacking). It is quite likely that you will see your spouse's goodwill coming right back at you. The truth is simple: we will see what we look for. No matter what happens, always assume your partner has basic goodwill toward you. How does that work in real married life? Here are some examples.

I know of one husband who made the decision always to assume his wife had goodwill. Not only did this simple commitment improve his attitude, but it also changed her entire attitude toward him! He writes: "I started giving her the benefit of the doubt ... I didn't tell her she was disrespectful or anything ... The results are stunning. She has been easier to live with. She doesn't nag me as much. She has shown increased interest in my hobbies. And she says I am like a new person." All this from simply giving her the benefit of the doubt! What does Proverbs 11:27 say? Look for good and you will find goodwill—sometimes in spades!

Or what about the wife who had to spend much of the summer apart from her husband because of their different career responsibilities? After several weeks she went to see him, meeting him at his office, where she knew he was under a lot of stress because of an important interview coming up. She hoped for at least a hug or a kiss but was greeted instead by a preoccupied husband who practically ignored her. Although she was hurt, she asked God to help her remember he was a goodwilled man who simply needed some time to prepare for an important interview.

Her prayers and patience paid off. Two hours later he "emerged a refreshed and lighter man, full of hugs and kisses for me." They had a wonderful time the rest of the evening, as well as over the next several days. Before learning about goodwill and the Pink and Blue differences between men and women, she would have belittled her preoccupied husband in no uncertain terms. This time she turned to God for understanding and felt true peace because she was able to look at the situation from his male (Blue) point of view.

Does seeking good in your spouse when he or she has not shown much goodwill always work? No, not always, but remember this simple but powerful principle: assuming goodwill in your partner is always the best policy. Keep on seeking the good; eventually you will find it and goodwill as well.

PRAYER: thank the Lord for the goodwill each of you has toward the other. Ask him for strength to give each other the benefit of the doubt during moments when someone's goodwill seems to be lacking.

ACTION: During disagreements and conflicts, tell yourself, my spouse has goodwill toward me—even though it doesn't feel that way right now. (For discussion questions, see page 217 in appendix A.)

Chapter Four

God Joined You Together, and He Will Keep You Together

Matthew 19:6:

So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.

We are all familiar with the phrase "until death do you part" in the wedding vows. The Christian view is that marriage is for keeps, a value that is under constant attack in our present-day culture. Jesus' words are a powerful reminder that God has joined you together, not some human legal requirement. I hear from many couples who are very sure of this. Regardless of marital bumps, they say, "God brought us together, and that is all that matters," or "We know God brought us together," or (typical of our cyberspace times) "We met over the Net, and God brought us together in the most wonderful way."

Sincere believers agree with these enthusiastic testimonies and start out wanting to keep their vows, but for many, something goes awry on the road to wedded bliss. One spouse writes: "I believe in my heart that God brought us together, but we can't talk to each other at all without getting into a huge fight." And another says: "Because we felt so strongly that God led us together, we were so puzzled that after only one year we were so unhappy and having so much conflict."

(Continues...)



Excerpted from The Love & Respect Experience by Emerson Eggerichs Copyright © 2011 by Emerson Eggerichs. Excerpted by permission of Thomas Nelson. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

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Table of Contents

Contents

Introduction: Wanted: A Husband-Friendly Devotional Book....................xi
Options for Using This Book on Your Own Terms....................xix
Chapter 1: And They Lived Happily Ever After ... Not Necessarily....................1
Chapter 2: Pink and Blue: Not Wrong, Just Different!....................5
Chapter 3: Do You Have a Goodwilled Marriage?....................9
Chapter 4: God Joined You Together, and He Will Keep You Together....................13
Chapter 5: The 80:20 Ratio: The Secret to Appreciating Your Marriage....................17
Chapter 6: Mistakes Happen—and Then What?....................21
Chapter 7: Question: What Is Love? Answer: C-O-U-P-L-E....................24
Chapter 8: Question: What Is Respect? Answer: C-H-A-I-R-S....................28
Chapter 9: Newton's Law: The Crazy Cycle in Action....................32
Chapter 10: He Loves Us Because He Loves Us Because He Loves Us!....................36
Chapter 11: Her Pink plus His Blue Equals God's Purple....................40
Chapter 12: It's All About Perspective....................44
Chapter 13: Those Who Pray Together Learn to Love & Respect Together....................48
Chapter 14: Who Is on Your Mental Committee?....................52
Chapter 15: To Tell the Truth ... Is Not Always Easy....................56
Chapter 16: Feelings Aren't Facts—Always Sort It Out....................60
Chapter 17: What Is Really Going on Here?....................64
Chapter 18: John Wooden: A Love & Respect Legacy for the Ages....................68
Chapter 19: Forget the Negative Snapshots—Enjoy the Positive Movie....................73
Chapter 20: Sex and Affection: A Two-Way Street....................77
Chapter 21: Keep Your Eyes on the Lord, Not the Problem....................81
Chapter 22: Our "Good" May Be Willing, but Our Flesh Can Be Weak....................85
Chapter 23: Excuse Me, Is that Your Foot on My Air Hose?....................89
Chapter 24: It's Hard to Be Negative While Being Thankful....................93
Chapter 25: Don't Believe Everything Your Spouse Says (Especially in Anger)....................97
Chapter 26: Forgiveness, Part I: Love & Respect Takes Two Good Forgivers....................101
Chapter 27: Forgiveness, Part II: Got Forgiveness? Let Jesus Be Your Model....................105
Chapter 28: No Matter How You Feel, Trust Scripture More Than Your Feelings....................109
Chapter 29: Remember, God Designed Your Spouse—Be Patient!....................113
Chapter 30: Impact Others with Love & Respect....................117
Chapter 31: Mutual Submission, Sex, and Tuesday Night....................121
Chapter 32: Anger Can Be Dangerous ... Handle with Care....................125
Chapter 33: All Things Do Work Together for Good ... Sooner or Later....................129
Chapter 34: Do You Seek to Understand or Only Want to Be Understood?....................133
Chapter 35: It Is All About Me, After All....................137
Chapter 36: Who Makes the First Move in Your Marriage?....................141
Chapter 37: To Overcome the Past, Focus on the Prize....................145
Chapter 38: Is My Response Always My Responsibility?....................149
Chapter 39: Look! Just Over Your Spouse's Shoulder! It's Jesus!....................153
Chapter 40: If Only We Didn't Have Money Problems....................157
Chapter 41: Your Spouse Has Needs Only You Can Fill....................161
Chapter 42: But Is Your Spouse Supposed to Meet All Your Needs?....................165
Chapter 43: Your Children Are Watching....................169
Chapter 44: I Am Not Being Defensive!....................173
Chapter 45: How Positive Are You with Each Other?....................177
Chapter 46: Do You Ever Play the Blame Game?....................181
Chapter 47: Groupthink Can Be Toxic to Your Marriage....................185
Chapter 48: Do You Know How to Fight Fair?....................189
Chapter 49: Your Words Reveal Your Heart....................193
Chapter 50: Why We All Need Respect....................197
Chapter 51: Plug into the Power of Optimism....................201
Chapter 52: When It's All Been Said and Done....................205
A Final Word on Reaping the Rewards of Love & Respect....................209
Appendix A: Discussion Questions for Chapters 1–52....................213
Appendix B: The Three Cycles of Love & Respect....................273
Appendix C: Devotions for Married Couples: Command or Option?....................281
Appendix D: Where to Get Help for Sexual or Financial Problems....................289
Notes....................291
About the Author....................295
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Customer Reviews

Average Rating 3.5
( 19 )
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  • Posted December 27, 2011

    Amazing devotional

    About a year ago I went through a series in a Sunday School class at church called Love and Respect. Wow, it is a great curriculum that I think every couple should go through. Then when I was searching for a new book to review on BookSneeze, I came across the book The Love and Respect Experience. Basically it is a devotional book for couples based on the curriculum. You do not have to have had gone through the study to understand this book, but it does help a little bit to understand. The book itself is really nice. Kinda like a journal type material. It is very appealing to the eye. The devotions are short and they have discussion questions and the end of the devotion to get you and your spouse talking more about the devotion topic. It is broken down into 52 different devotions and is made to go through in a year doing one devotion a week. It is not in any kind of order so you can skip around and do whichever topic you feel lead to do each week, which I liked. This devotional I would say is a must read for couples.

    (Disclaimer: I recieved a copy of this book in exchange for my review. All opinions expressed are that of my own.)

    2 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted September 17, 2011

    horrible - wish I could give it no stars

    This is not a good book. It's actually a very poor work full of problematic interpretation and shoddy reasoning.

    The main premise of the Love and Respect theory is flawed. His exegesis and interpretation of the Ephesians 5 text is presumptuous, to say the least. The assumption is that since Paul admonishes husbands to love their wives, men should primarily focus on loving their wives. And since Paul tells women to submit to their husbands, they should primarily focus on respecting their husbands. And if everyone plays a neat part in this neat and tidy little plan, everything will go swimmingly. That's a lot to read into a few words, sliced neatly and taken out of context.

    So what we have here is an entire theory built out of a misinterpretation of biblical text, which is taken completely out of context. But the author sells it. He sells it very well, in a way where many unsuspecting people who haven't done their theological homework will listen to it and think, "Well hey, that sounds pretty good."

    Here's the biggest problem, one that should seem painfully obvious to all of us: love and respect, by definition, go hand in hand. You cannot love someone without respecting them also; neither can you respect someone without loving them.

    The book is horribly redundant. Eggrichs sounds like a broken record, spouting his mangled interpretation of Ephesians 5:33 constantly.

    Additionally, he loves playing off of stereotypes, which is evident if one doesn't read anywhere past the subtitle: A Husband-Friendly Devotional that Wives Truly Love. It might as well say We've Made This One Really Interesting for Husbands Since They Are So Uncaring. He also purports horrible generalizations of women, consistently shifting the responsibility of men onto women.

    There are many better books on marriage. Pass on this one.

    2 out of 8 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted December 3, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    Fantastic! I highly recommend this book for everyone.

    The Love And Respect Experience
    A Husband-Friendly Devotional that Wives Truly Love
    By: Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

    I did something before getting this book that I try to never do until after I have finished reading it: I read a review. Even worse, I read a negative review. I read this particular review for a couple of reasons, not the least of which was sheer curiosity. You see, I have read Dr. Eggerichs book Love And Respect, and it was truly wonderful. In my mind, I couldn't see anyone disliking the knowledge gleaned from his books. After reading a paragraph of that review, I realized that the reviewer didn't understand the material presented, nor would he ever appreciate the changes that the principals behind Love And Respect can bring. I knew then that I needed to read this book.

    I was not disappointed in the least. The Love And Respect Experience is a devotional book for couples. It has 52 chapters - so it's not a daily devotional - and each chapter is a nice review of the principals that Dr. Eggerichs has previously laid out in the Love And Respect book, however, you don't have to have already read Love And Respect to get the concept (although it certainly helps).

    This book is billed as a "husband-friendly devotional", and that much is almost true. There are a lot of discussion questions that we written more to engage the wives than get the husbands talking. Each question at the end of the chapter is more like question sets than simple queries. I found myself breaking each question set down and tackling the questions within each point one at a time. It is infinitely more husband friendly than most marriage devotionals, but it has some room to grow.

    The actual book itself is beautifully made, with a striking leather cover that makes me want to read it. The chapters are easy to follow, and the action items are simple and direct.

    This is a fantastic workbook to go along with the book Love and Respect, but even if you don't have the original book, this is still a phenomenal read. I highly recommend this book to everyone!

    I received this book for free as part of the Booksneeze blogger program. I was not required to write a favorable review.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted October 23, 2011

    Verses Plucked Out Of Context & Cropped to Fit Psychology View Points

    If you normally enjoy devotionals & psychology, you will like this book. If you want strong Biblical teachings, you will not enjoy this book at all.

    This is a large-sized devotional book designed for married couples, designed to appeal to both men and women, with its brown leathery cover. Unlike most devotionals, this book is full-sized and very simple and plain looking, to appeal to men. This is not a 365 day devotional but only has 52 chapters. This book has the feel-good from being a devotional and also from all its psychology emphasis.

    Bible verses that are used are VERY short because they are cut off and not full verses. Verses are plucked out of context from the Bible, cropped accordingly, and rarely is the full verse even used. These short cropped verses are then used to support what the author wants to say. Often the author's story and the verse really have nothing to do with each other. They are out of context. The verses come from about a dozen different very paraphrased modern Bible translations: think Message, Good News and many I've never even heard of before! If biblical accuracy or biblical counseling is important to you, you will probably not like this book.

    Disclaimer: I gave my honest review. I received this book from the publisher but a positive review was not required.

    1 out of 2 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted October 15, 2011

    Psychology-based marriage advice; Not so Biblically/Theologically sound

    "The Love & Respect Experience: A Husband-Friendly Devotional That Wives Truly Love is a large sized, leather-like covered, devotional designed for men and women. The book covers 52 subjects (not a 365 day devotional) all based on making married life work, appreciating what you have, and treating one another with love and respect. Each chapter starts off with a short snippet from a Bible verse and ends with a Prayer and a Call to Action.

    I'm not usually a fan of devotionals, but I thought this one was okay. I love the feel of the book cover - the fake leather cover is so smooth and nice. It feels like suade-leather and is very pretty to look at and the paperback/leatherback is soft to hold.

    This devotional is a bit different from most. It is not only geared for women, but also husbands can benefit from it too. It's not as fluffy as most devotionals, so the men won't be turned off by pink and purple flowery designs and fluffy commentaries. All the subjects have to do with making a marriage work, so they all apply and are relevant for both men and women. But like most devotionals, this book is also full of light reading and is not deep.

    The part that will probably bother Christians the most is that this book comes across as more of a psychology/family therapy devotional than a Christian/Biblically-based devotional. It's all helpful stuff and good for married couples to remind them to behave lovingly towards one another, but it may be more fluffy stuff that sounds all good in the head but harder to apply in real life. If you are into Psychology, you will probably like this book. If you are into theology and books being biblically based, you will want to pass.

    I like a lot of the ideas in this book: Marriage is about getting back up/Men and women think and desire different things, but that doesn't make the others' view incorrect. They are just different/Assume your spouse has good intentions towards you NO MATTER WHAT/Once married, always married. It's up to you to iron out the kinks, because you are in this for the long run/Mistakes can't be undone, but they should be forgiven/Choose your words wisely because they can be like punches and you might just be punched back/Suppressing negative feelings isn't the solution. Talk to one another about your feelings with love and consideration/Be fair about sex and don't play games, but meet each others' needs/Don't let your problems distract you from God, but keep your focus on the Lord and He will help you with your problems/When your spouse yells cutting words, don't believe them all. They could just be venting and often don't really mean what they say in angery/Practice quick forgiveness no matter what the crime/God designed your spouse just for you, so enjoy what you have been given and be patient when times are tough/Love God, trust Him, and everything will work out.


    Disclaimer: I received this book free of charge from the publisher but I am giving my honest review.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted October 4, 2011

    more from this reviewer

    Encourage all marriages to read this book!!

    The Love & Respect Experience by: Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, A Husband Friendly Devotional that Wives Truly Love

    "Without Love, she reacts without Respect.
    Without Respect, he reacts without Love."

    Love and respect, the two keys to a great marriage. That is exactly what this devotional is about. The Love & Respect Experience by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs is a fantastic tool for couples, who are willing to put there busy schedules aside and have regular devotion time together.

    The leather bound book shows it to be husband friendly but it can be vice versa. Fifty-two chapters, one for each week, is perfect for couples to come together and taking these step by step, and get full revelation of how God wants our marriages to be. Dr. Emerson intends for couples to sit and read these together and discuss the topic at hand. Communication is one of the best ingredients for a great marriage. What a better way to communicate?!

    Each chapter begins with a title and a bible scripture following. Dr. Emerson takes that scripture and dissects it down, along with that week's topic. Each week's devotional is no more than one or two pages long. Which is perfect for busy schedules, but it still gives you that one on one time with your spouse. Following each devotional is a prayer and an action. The prayer isn't a "pray now and be healed" prayer. It is basically a "what to ask for" prayer, If that makes sense.

    Example: "PRAYER: If you are facing no big problems, thank the Lord. If you are facing something that appears overwhelming, confess that you are powerless, that you don't know what to do, but that your eyes are on the Lord. Praise Him, knowing the battle is not yours, but His. (You may want to bring up problems you're having at work, at church, or in other outside settings that can affect you at home.) Eggerichs 2011

    I would absolutely encourage all marriages to take this book and learn about themselves and their marriage. If one spouse refuses to take part, then simply study it yourself. Get a better understanding why the other spouse acts the way they do. Pray for their heart to be softened and become a willing vessel to know the in's and out's of there marriage.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted September 30, 2011

    A great, easily read devotional

    The Love and Respect Experience by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs was just as great as his book Love and Respect. The Experience is a devotional written so that men will enjoy and based on the assumption that women will love it. It is written in such a way that the couple can read it together or separately, taking one chapter a week for a year. Readers start with chapter one and end with chapter 52 but have the freedom to mix up the chapters in between. The Love and Respect Experience is based largely on his earlier book Love and Respect and revisits several of the themes explored in it; including the love and respect cycles and the crazy cycles. It also includes anecdotes from couples he has helped. The book not only has chapters that cover some of the same topics in Love and Respect but it includes a suggested prayer and discussion questions. It is advised that couples read it separately and think about the discussion questions for the first few days of the week before coming together to talk about the chapter and pray together. It was a really easy read and a book that I'll be certain to take slowly with my husband.

    1 out of 1 people found this review helpful.

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  • Posted March 26, 2013

    It is good if you like couples devotionals.  I prefer to read th

    It is good if you like couples devotionals.  I prefer to read the Bible, journal on it(SOAP method) and share it with each other or just pray with each other in the morning.  

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  • Posted November 9, 2012

    The content is good and we noticed it had some good advice, but

    The content is good and we noticed it had some good advice, but it seemed pretty basic and it went off the original book of The Love and Respect Experience. So, if you have read that book -and loved it- then you should love this too. It may have quite a bit of repeat information, but it is an easy-to-read and follow devotional. There are only 52 devotionals (one per week) versus the normal 365 (one for every day), which is a step in the right direction in my opinion. This gives some freedom and diversity to fit a larger group of married couples.

    If you love devotionals and KNOW you will use it, then I recommend this one. This could also make a beautiful gift.

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  • Posted January 23, 2012

    Great devotional

    A while ago I was given a copy of the Love and Respect Devotional. I enjoyed the book by Emerson Eggerichs, so I thought a devotional would be a great way to get closer to my husband and learn more about each other.

    There is 52 devotionals, which is nice because it would be hard to do a 365 devotional with another person. The devotional can be done by the couples or just by one and shared with the other. My husband isn't so good with devotionals so I do a lot of reading and then we converse about the things I learned.

    It was a good devotional. Great insights and spurred great conversation. You can take your time with this one and use it when you need some couple time or to help grow closer!

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  • Posted January 4, 2012

    Much Needed!

    I have been looking for ways to find hope in different areas of my life recently. Nothing that I share to discuss as it could fill an entire page. Needless to say, I have been drawn to devotionals that show me just how much God loves ME. In The Love and Respect Experience: A Husband-Friendly Devotional that Wives Love, by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, I found that God loves me in the most profound ways, and I felt love that I needed. I also saw a lot of things that I need to work on as a woman, a person, and a wife.
    Eggerichs uses very brief passages and stories to share his message. It is a 52 chapter devotional intended to be read by both husbands and wives. It is intended to be thought about and talked about as a couple when the time permits. My husband is not into devotionals, at least as far as I can tell he is not. So I have spent the time reading this and marking it up with things that I found very eye-catching and opening. I intend to share these ¿chapters and highlights¿ with my husband when he is willing and has time. I think that if I can share short pieces with him he will be more in tune to read more of it.
    I believe husbands and wives will benefit from this as there is also a section for discussion questions and other appendices that focus on the insights that Eggerichs shares.
    This is a must read for all couples, husbands alone, or wives alone.
    Thank you Booksneeze for the opportunity to review this book!

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  • Posted November 28, 2011

    I would HIGHLY recommend this book

    This book is really all about having a successful marriage. It never says that marriage is gonna be easy but it gives great ways to make it better. It is set up with 52 chapters so you can do one chapter a week for the year. It was an easy to follow easy to read book. Because I wanted to give you all a review, I read through it on my own and shared bits and pieces with my husband. The chapters are nice and short and the information is very applicable to everyday marriage. If you have read the love and respect book then "The Love and respect Experience" is a great way to keep everything fresh in your mind.

    I found it difficult to read only one chapter at a time, and I am looking forward to reading it again. It is the type of book that once you read a chapter a week for a year you will be ready to do it all over again. There is so much to learn and so much to apply to a great marriage. Each chapter has a small square of insight to highlight some main pointers, they are easy to find and I love being able to go back to them and read over them again and again.

    I was very glad to get the chance to read this book and share this with you all and I would definitely recommend this book. it was well written and looks great. Its an easy read as I said earlier. I hope you can give it a try. 52 weeks isn't really that long.

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  • Posted November 1, 2011

    Good Christmas Gift!

    A few years ago during a particularly turbulent time in my former marriage, a friend bought me a copy of the book Love and Respect. I went through it alone as my spouse was not interested or willing to read it. I found the insights within to be helpful for me to understand some aspects of my marriage problems, but also was not overly impressed with how to deal with a non responsive spouse. When I had the opportunity to review the Couples Devotional of the same name, I was a bit dubious and excited at the same time.

    I can say from personal experience that while there are many, MANY books available by wonderful Christian and secular authors that give tips on how to strengthen relationships and marriages, none of them is "the" answer to your marital problems. For some couples it helps tremendously. For others, like myself in my former relationship, it did nothing but increase the pain I felt in regards to my marriage. That said, I was open to reading and reviewing this devotional to see if it had any new/different insights or if it would make a good accompaniment to the original book.

    It is a beautiful gift book as it is leather bound with a high quality yet rugged look to it. It is definitely more appealing to the male half of your marriage as it isn't your typical devotional in a "frilly" or "girly" package. It is laid out very simply with daily scripture passages and devotional thoughts that center upon key aspects housed within the original book. Most are common issues or concerns within any serious relationship whether it be marital or a simple male/female dating relationship. The suggestions and easy devotionals within are simple enough to do in a limited amount of time and user friendly enough that virtually anyone can handle with ease. I agree with it's presentation notes that indeed it is "man friendly". It's not overly mushy or girly and it is simple and not complex in nature. In fact, there may be a few women who don't care for it because it doesn't have the typical "feel good" nature of most women's Bible studies.

    Although it's not something I would have picked up on my own due to my poor experience with the original book that accompanies this devotional, I do give it 4 out of 5 stars. It is well laid out, user friendly and not overly complicated. I feel that it would be better used if separated into 2 editions. One geared toward the female in the relationship and one geared toward the male in the relationship. From my personal experience, a devotional time is something deeply personal. I personally don't like writing my thoughts into a study book that someone else will be reading/sharing. I would much prefer to have one of my own to use and then get together at some point during the day and discuss my thoughts with my partner and receive their honest opinion and thoughts as well. Overall, it's a very nice Devotional guide for couples with a lot of good insights into the typical relationship. At a fairly low cost at most major retailers, it is definitely an item to put on your Christmas shopping guide to grab for some of the couples in your life

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  • Posted October 12, 2011

    The Love and Respect Experience

    The cover of this book is beautiful with two different colors of leather and an embossed title. The book contains 52 devotions which couples can read together or individually and discuss later. The author explains different options for using the devotions. The appendix contains discussion questions for each devotion, a brief explanation of love and respect, an explanation of whether couples devotions are a command or an option and a help section. I was surprised at how beautiful this book is. I ordered it without asking my husband if he wanted to read it with me. He was excited to start devotions with me as a way to strengthen our marriage. He actually read the first devotion before I got a chance to! That shows you how well this book works for men as my husband doesn't like to read. I like the discussion questions that go along with each devotion because they help me really think about what I'm learning and give my husband and I a way to start a discussion about each chapter. I have not read love and respect so the explanation in the appendix was a welcome learning tool. I love the look and feel of this book and will enjoy reading it with my husband over the next year or so. I received a free copy of this book from Booksneeze and have shared my honest opinion.

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  • Posted September 26, 2011

    A Nice experience for couples

    The basic premise of this devotional book, and apparently Love and Respect, is, based on Ephesians 5:33, that men most need respect from their wives and women most need love from their husbands. Each devotional (there are 52) is just a few pages long and begins with Scripture and includes a personal example followed by suggestions for prayer and action. Eggerichs recommends that couples read the material separately and then come together to simply discuss them, thereby reducing the common awkwardness of reading a devotion out loud.Its beautiful leather binding and creamy paper is so giftable and I would recommend this book for any married couple or soon-to-be-married couple.

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  • Posted September 25, 2011

    Great for Husbands

    I own Eggerichs book, Love and Respect, which I recommend if you have never read. It has a lot of great information on how the woman needs love and the husband wants her respect. The Love & Respect Experience is simply from his previous work. He has taken the information from Love and Respect and compacted it into a devotional.

    This devotional is easy to understand and read. It has clear content. Eggerichs says it for the husbands who do not want to feel "forced or overwhelmed", but rather to provide and produce closeness that wives yearn for. The book has 52 different devotions which are about two pages in length. Each devotion includes a Bible Verse, insight, prayer and actions points. You might wonder why only 52 devotions? Well, research shows the average marriage does not have time to read 360 devotions a year together. This once a week strategy is perfect for the average married couple. In addition, the reader is provided with discussion questions.

    Eggerichs urges couples to read separately throughout the week and then come together and discuss what one has read. He says this will help decrease the awkwardness that happens when couples read it aloud.

    This devotional is leather bound and would be great for the newly married couple or the couple that has been together for twenty years. This would serve as a great gift or a companion to Love and Respect.

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  • Anonymous

    Posted September 15, 2011

    Doesn't disappoint!

    I am a huge fan of the Love and Respect Series and as such jumped at the chance to review the newest book in the series. This book is a set of devotionals which build on the principles in the Love and Respect book. These devotionals are written so that husbands and wives both feel comfortable using them. Even though I am female, I agree that often couple devotionals are written in a style which is a little more feminine than masculine. I also like the freedom with this book. Basically the reader couple if free to use the devotionals however they like. The devotions can either be read together or separately and then come together to talk about the devotional. The book also provides freedom for completion of the devotionals. Couples can complete each devotional daily, weekly, biweekly, whatever works for the individual couple! The principles are solid, and any couple can benefit from this book.
    Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 : "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

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  • Anonymous

    Posted November 10, 2011

    No text was provided for this review.

  • Anonymous

    Posted November 7, 2011

    No text was provided for this review.

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