6 Fictional Characters’ Celebrity Cookbooks We Would Definitely Read

Hagrid’s Inedible Tea, by Rubeus Hagrid (the Harry Potter series, by J.K. Rowling)
In today’s world of Instagram faux-perfection, the role of the enthusiastically terrible cook has been slowly but surely eroded, leaving the impression that every home chef should be capable of whipping up a casually delicious four-course meal featuring organic ingredients grown in their own backyard. This latest from very large person Rubeus Hagrid pushes back, reclaiming important space for the truly awful amateur cook and assuring readers that if they can make something even slightly better than Hagrid can, they’re doing alright. Stand-out recipes include Hagrid’s Almost Edible Rock Cakes and A Very Very Large Cup of Hot and Over-Brewed Tea.

Anne and Diana’s Truly Elegant Guide to Cakes, Custards, and Cordials, by Anne Shirley and Diana Barry (Anne of Green Gables, by L.M. Montgomery)
This essential guide from two of P.E.I.’s most imaginative chefs comes just in time for the delicate outdoor teas of spring. Taking inspiration from a wide variety of sources, including poetry and the theater, Shirley and Barry concoct dozens of unique and cutting-edge recipes, including the daring Plum Pudding with Drowned Mouse Sauce and the whimsically cheeky Suspiciously Intoxicating Raspberry Cordial. A must-read for innovative chefs looking to make a splash at their next dinner party (and a great gift as well).

How to Kill, Skin, Gut, and Eat Your Own Animals, by Katniss Everdeen (The Hunger Games, by Suzanne Collins)
This surprising entry from District Twelve’s other celebrity comes on the heels of her husband’s fifth major baking guide, Beyond Loaves: Peeta’s Guide to Muffins, Rolls, Biscuits, and Buns, and takes a straightforward approach to its topic. Fans of Mellark’s diffident, comfortable prose may be taken aback at first by Everdeen’s brief, assertive, and gruesomely illustrated writing, but with recipes like Rabbit on a Spit, Pigeon on a Spit, and Deer on a Larger Spit, How to Kill, Skin, Gut, and Eat Your Own Animals is guaranteed to become a kitchen classic.

Losing Weight the Sex Goddess Way, by Bridget Jones (Bridget Jones’s Diary, by Helen Fielding)
The latest from diet guru Jones, Losing Weight the Sex Goddess Way is half cookbook, half no-holds-barred sex guide. Filled with helpful tips for both entertaining (when you introduce guests to each other, make sure to include one interesting fact about each of them) and cooking (match the color of your kitchen twine to your dishes, so that the end results coordinate), Losing Weight also includes delicious dishes like Cigarettes with Red Wine, Turkey Curry Buffet with Red Wine, and, my personal favorite, Chocolate with Red Wine.

Mastering the Art of Cannibal Cuisine, by Dr. Hannibal Lecter (Red Dragon, by Thomas Harris)
Not since Julia Child and Marcella Hazan has a cookbook been as revolutionary as this detailed, impeccably presented masterpiece from noted gourmand and serial killer Lecter. Containing over 500 recipes with clear, elegantly written instructions and diagrams, Mastering the Art of Cannibal Cuisine would have earned its place in the pantheon of cookbook greats even if it didn’t include an extensive section covering the basics of cannibalism for the first time chef, a wine-pairing list, and a series of delightful serving and table-decorating suggestions.

99 Cocktails From the Gatsby Mansion, by Jay Gatsby (The Great Gatsby, by F. Scott Fitzgerald)
The drinks are only part of the reason to buy this glossy collection, put together by the Gatsby mansion staff as a poignant memorial to the recently departed man of the house himself (apparently the author attribution isn’t entirely fictional, either—the staff swears Gatsby was well-known for developing new and delicious cocktails). The book takes the reader on a glamorous, whirlwind tour of the Gatsby mansion in dozens of beautifully printed photographs, giving an elusive, haunting glimpse into a decadent and dangerous world in between easy-to-follow recipes for most classic cocktails. A perfect hostess gift.