The 18 Most Wack Things Amelia Bedelia Ever Did

We’ve all had a good laugh or two over the crazy antics of everyone’s favorite housemaid, Amelia Bedelia. But have you ever actually considered the ramifications of her actions? Some of the things she does aren’t cute and hilarious, they’re frightening and dangerous! Below, a list of the 18 most nutzo things Miss Bedelia ever did, at least 17 of them grounds for firing. Thank God Mr. and Mrs. Rogers were patient with her. Because who knows what kind of trouble she would have caused in the unemployment office.

Note: All the titles in the Amelia Bedelia series are instantly funnier when read when with a sarcastic slant. Thank You, Amelia Bedelia. Good Driving, Amelia Bedelia. Amelia Bedelia, Rocket Scientist? It’s as if Peggy Parish was thinking, “yeah, right.”

18. Amelia Bedelia planted lightbulbs instead of flower bulbs into clay flower pots. (Teach Us, Amelia Bedelia!) Wait a second, that’s not so crazy. I think I had to do this for a science project in elementary school.

17. Amelia Bedelia flung flowers around living room with reckless abandon when asked to scatter flowers in decoration. (Thank You, Amelia Bedelia) Is Amelia Bedelia trying to ignite a spark with her boyfriend on Valentine’s Day? Maybe? Okay, then. This is acceptable.

16. Amelia Bedelia made cheesecake by decorating blocks of cheese. (Amelia Bedelia Bakes Off) Actually, I think I saw this on Pinterest once.

15. Amelia Bedelia did not know the difference between a voting poll and a fishing pole. (Amelia Bedelia 4 Mayor) I’m sure Obama did the same thing during his campaign, he just had a PR team to cover it up.

14. Amelia Bedelia knitted jackets for books with yarn. (Amelia Bedelia, Bookworm) This is either crazy or adorable.

13. Amelia Bedelia sewed seeds onto string instead of sowing them like a normal gardener would do. (Amelia Bedelia Helps Out) This isn’t harmful or anything, I’d just say it’s a huge waste of time.

12. Amelia Bedelia put a cat in a box full of garbage instead of a litter box. (Amelia Bedelia and the Cat) As a cat owner myself, I find this appalling. I’m surprised Amelia Bedelia didn’t get her eyes scratched out.

11. Amelia Bedelia pinched Cousin Alcolu when she needs a “pinch of salt” for a recipe. (Amelia Bedelia Bakes Off) Good thing Cousin Alcolu seems to be just as clueless and simple minded as AB. In a rougher neighborhood, this could get you cut in the face.

10. Amelia Bedelia rolled jelly on the floor when Mrs. Rogers asked her to make a jelly roll. (Thank You, Amelia Bedelia) Maids are supposed to clean up messes, not make them. I’m going to talk to my therapist about this one.

9. Amelia Bedelia cut holes in Mrs. Roger’s dress when she’s asked to “remove spots.” (Thank You, Amelia Bedelia) Of all the things the girl has done, this makes probably the least amount of sense.

8. Amelia Bedelia took a crazy sharp left turn with the car when Mr. Rogers said to “bear left.” (Good Driving, Amelia Bedelia) This is kind of Mr. Rogers’s fault. Who gives this women their car keys?

7. Amelia Bedelia vigorously shredded sheets when asked to “strip sheets” off bed. (Thank You, Amelia Bedelia) This is maniacal behavior. Look at those crazy eyes!

6. Amelia Bedelia doused women with water from the gardening hose for her wedding shower. (Amelia Bedelia and the Surprise Shower) Was this really a misunderstanding? Maybe Amelia Bedelia just couldn’t take it anymore.

5. Amelia Bedelia took a nap herself when she was supposed to put baby down for a nap. (Amelia Bedelia and the Baby) While Amelia was snoozing, Baby escaped, prompting the 1994 hit blockbuster “Baby’s Day Out.” And then a bunch of even worse stuff happened when the baby hit the streets.

4. Amelia Bedelia put a ton of extra baking soda in a child’s volcano at the science fair. (Amelia Bedelia, Rocket Scientist?) Cool, Amelia knows how to build explosives. Was that on her resume? Or is she just sabotaging a student she dislikes? (Note: Amelia Bedelia is no rocket scientist.)

3. Amelia Bedelia grabbed Dick in a baseball game. (Play Ball, Amelia Bedelia) This would be so upsetting for Dick’s mother.

2. Amelia Bedelia kidnapped classroom full of children and brought them to her home. (Teach Us, Amelia Bedelia) And it was the third time in one week that Amelia Bedelia made it on the six o’clock news. Some schools need to improve their background check system.

1. Amelia Bedelia took over a doctor’s office and gave faulty and dangerous medical advice to patients. (Calling Doctor Amelia Bedelia) Instead of asking Amelia Bedelia for medical guidance, why don’t you just ram a stapler gun through your hands and vigorously scrub the wounds with lemon juice? It’ll save you a call.

 Do you remember reading Amelia Bedelia? What do you think was the silliest thing she ever did?