1,047 Reasons to Smile: Little Things that Bring Joy, Happiness, and Excitement

by Elizabeth Dutton

Overview

Smiling has been shown to relieve stress, boost the immune system, release endorphins, and even make us more attractive. It's the natural drug. Whether it's the sight of baby animals wrestling each other or watching pigeons fight over a Cheeto, there are more than enough funny, silly, and downright weird reasons to put a smile on your face inside this little book of joy, including:
When the person in the next lane lets you ahead of them in heavy traffic
When you finally get back into your own bed after being away from home
You check the calendar on a Friday and realize that Monday is a holiday
In our overworked, overstressed day to day life, it’s difficult to find time to relax and enjoy the simple, little things in life. These simple little things that make us smile keep us going throughout the day and motivate us to carry on when things may seem difficult. With this book, you won’t have to look far to find these simple pleasures. So put down the Xanx and grab yourself a copy of 1,047 Reasons to Smile.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781634504058
Publisher:	Skyhorse
Publication date:	10/06/2015
Edition description:	Second Edition
Pages:	224
Product dimensions:	5.10(w) x 7.00(h) x 1.10(d)

About the Author

Elizabeth Dutton was born and raised in California. She received her master’s degree in creative writing from the University of Glasgow in Scotland. She currently resides in Chesterfield, South Carolina.

Read an Excerpt

CHAPTER 1

1,047

REASONS TO SMILE

The world, I am sure you will agree, is a weird and wonderful place. There seems to be collectively more good than bad in society, otherwise we wouldn't all still be here. However, there are times when the insanity or the anguish or the confusion or the evil are just too much for the everyman (and everywoman) to bear. When this world and the other fragile humans that populate it overwhelm us, when life is painful or even simply boring, we need to be reminded of the weird and wonderful. The weird and wonderful are what make us smile, and those smiles keep us going. Smiles are pretty much universal — no matter your language or culture, a smile at its core means friendship, happiness, and ease. What follows are reasons to smile, simple as that. The title quantifies the reasons, but within these pages are far more and far fewer than 1,047 reasons to slap a grin on your gorgeous mug; everyone's smile mileage will vary. It is safe to say, though, that you'll find something in here to put a smile on your face. And if not? Then maybe you can smile with satisfaction at having been impervious to these attempts. Whatever gets you there, the object here is to smile.

* Kittens in boxes. Even those who are allergic to cats have to admit that a small, fluffy kitten playing, sleeping, or just sitting in a box is pretty cute. Why the box? The cute is concentrated then, contained in one little cute space. And focused cute deserves a smile.

* Finding money in a pocket. You know how this goes: you put on a coat you haven't worn in months, put your hand in the pocket and feel something there. This time, though, it's not an old tissue or a receipt. It's cash. Beautiful, forgotten cash.

* Wrong number calls from super polite old ladies. You answer the phone. "Is Hegatha there?" As your name isn't Hegatha, you tell the caller, "No, I think you have the wrong number." Instead of a mumbled "oh" or just the click of the call disconnecting, the caller says in a frail, sweet, I'll-bake-you-some-cookies voice, "Well, my goodness. I am so sorry to bother you! Have a pleasant day." And you will, because now you are smiling.

* Baby animals. Tiny, adorable, not yet deadly or painfully ugly.

* Baby animals wrestling. Tiny, adorable, tumbling around without a care in the world.

* Baby animals driving muscle cars. Maybe a little unbelievable, but sort of funny to imagine, right?

* Getting back into your own bed after being away from home. Travel for pleasure is great, travel for business ... not so much. But one thing they have in common is that when the trip has ended and you are no longer sleeping in a strange bed (which you've tried not to imagine the look of under a black light) or a friend's couch and you get to crawl back under your own covers, there is a certain bliss that (no matter how lumpy your own mattress may be) comes with knowing that you are home.

* Dapper old men. Old men do dapper like no one else. Young guys just don't have the suave gravitas to pull it off. When an older gentleman dons a suit and hat to ride a train and graciously gives up his seat to a younger person (even though you know his bones ache and he'd rather be wearing sweats and fleece slippers), you can't help but smile at the way he keeps it real. Real cool.

* Seeing the person in the car next to you singing along with their radio at the top of their lungs. Everybody has that song they love that they can't help but sing along to. And some people get so overwhelmed with the awesomeness flooding their ears that they forget about the outside world and just belt it out. That's a boundless, unrestrained happiness that for sure deserves a smile.

* Inside jokes. We all have them with family or friends: a word or phrase that has a story too long to explain and is most likely one of those "you had to be there" moments, but that to this day can make you laugh.

* When consumer advocate segments on the local news really skewer the bad guy and help the victim. There is such satisfaction in seeing the underdog win for once and seeing the evil, mustache-twirling bully get his or her comeuppance.

* When you get in the car and your favorite song has just started on the radio. You LOVE this song. They never play it. It just started. Smile.

* The look on Mike Myers's face when Kanye West said George W. Bush didn't care about black people. It was shock, it was confusion, it was fear, it was agreement. It was hilarious.

* The Auto Correct feature on the iPad changes "Awwwwww" to "Asses." This is funny and makes you smile when you catch it before you send out the response to the picture of your friend's/cousin's/neighbor's baby. And maybe it's still a little funny when you don't catch it before you hit "send."

* Imagining Keith Richards at a parent/teacher conference. We have all these rock stars who live wild lives and have raucous images. They also, though, usually have kids. Some aren't too involved with their kids' lives, but a surprising number are. Imagine Keith Richards at a parent/teacher conference or a recital and you can't help but smile at the dichotomy.

* Holding the hand of someone you fancy for the first time. Ah, this is electric bliss. And even the memory of electric bliss merits a smile.

* First kisses. More electric bliss.

* Emails from long-lost friends. You see a name in your inbox that you haven't seen or thought about in ages. They've reached out across the years and made a connection and obviously you made an impact on them. That enduring link is one of the coolest things about humanity.

* Sitting in first class. Everything is more comfortable and comfort makes you smile.

* The smell of freshly cut grass. It smells clean (smile for clean), fresh (smile for fresh), and means things are growing and living (double smile for that).

* Finding shapes in the clouds. We did this as kids — watched the clouds shift into discernable shapes, taking on the look of everyday or fantastic objects. It may seem a little cutesy and hipsterish to do now, but try it. It's even better when you have someone with you. It's still pretty cool and will still make you smile. Especially if you see something naughty.

* Kids who hear live music and can't help but dance. You've seen this. You are at some farmers' market or festival and there's a stage on which some local band plays a cover song that most passersby let flow by them without notice. But then there's some kid, usually a toddler. The music is absolutely infectious to this child and he or she is unable to prevent knees from bending and arms from pumping. Total slave to the rhythm and it's awfully sweet.

* Dogs in blankets. Dogs get cold, too, you know. And some dogs like being wrapped in a blanket. Swaddled puppy smile.

* Old couples in love. For the jaded and world-weary who've had their hearts cast aside like some sort of non-biodegradable bag of chips, it is still a bit reassuring to see two elderly people who really, truly love each other no matter what. That love does exist and knowing that makes you smile.

* Pre-teen boys getting nervous around pre-teen girls. They guffaw, they nudge each other, they strut, they preen. It's like an episode of Wild Kingdom. Except it's in a mall and the anxious sincerity of it all is enough to make anyone smile. At the very least, because we lived through it.

* When kids mispronounce words or just make them up. There's just something irresistibly endearing about a kid very confidently announcing that her juice is "in the frijadader" or that he wants his "Buffer Baby book" (which after much confusion is translated as an alphabet book that contains the page "B for Baby").

* Rainbows. Prismatic pot of gold and end of storm smile.

* Double rainbows! Double smile! And maybe even a YouTube video.

* Watching a bumblebee struggle flying because of legs loaded down with pollen. C'mon, that's just precious.

* When the person in the next lane lets you ahead of them in heavy traffic. That sort of unexpected kindness is sure to give you a smile. And then maybe you'll do the same for someone else and then they will smile and pretty soon Haley Joel Osment (whatever happened to him?) is there and we're all passing it on and smiling like fools and loving it. And maybe seeing dead people? I don't know.

* When someone who looks tough or scary does something very gracious and kind. Tough looking guys with prison-style neck tattoos helping a stranger struggling to load something into his or her car. Smile at the unexpected.

* Checking the calendar on a Friday and realizing that Monday is a holiday. Sweet relief.

* Amazing sunsets. Whether you are watching the sky burn orange and red as the sun dips behind mountains or waiting for the mythical green flash at the moment the sun dips into the horizon on the Pacific Ocean, it's a gorgeous way to say goodbye to another day and hello to another evening.

* Watching pigeons fight over a Cheeto. Kind of gross, but kind of funny.

* Hearing that someone is newly cancer-free. This is a welcome change from expected bad news and a victory for that person and everyone who loves them. This for sure gets a smile or two.

* Blooper reels over the credits at the end of a movie. Whether the movie was good or not, it is always kind of nice to see that everyone messes up on the job, no matter what they do. And they laugh about it, too.

* Wildflowers. No one went out and planted them in that spot. No one tends to them or makes sure they're watered and fertilized. They just happen. Little wonders of color in sometimes unlikely places. Extra smile if it's a field of California poppies, which look like cups of molten gold and sunshine.

* People who drive around with their cat in the car. They are making the bold move away from the typical dog with lips a- flapping in the wind out a car window. They are opting, instead, for a usually pudgy cat stretched out on the dashboard or pressed against the rear window. Either way, kudos to them for doing their own thing.

* When kids get new shoes and are convinced they can now run faster. This is excitement over getting something new and all your own, but also that fantastically innocent mythical thinking that the impossible is not so.

* The names of Popeye's four nephews are Pipeye, Peepeye, Pupeye, and Poopeye. Thank you, E. C. Segar (the creator of Popeye) for the chuckles.

* Just like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different. Yes, this has apparently already been on an episode of CSI:NY. But it's still pretty cool.

* Legend has it that Babe Ruth wore a cabbage leaf under his baseball hat to keep him cool. I don't know if it's true or not, but it's weird enough to make me smile.

* In the year 2000, Pope John Paul II was named an "Honorary Harlem Globetrotter." 50,000 people attended a ceremony in St. Peter's Square for the announcement of this honor. Another honorary Globetrotter? Henry Kissenger.

* Realizing that Guy Fieri is the fifth Horseman of the Apocalypse. This realization will put a smile on your face because now you are able to pin down exactly what it is about him that is so revolting. He's a harbinger of the end times.

* People who call soap operas "my stories." This is rather sweet, no?

* Saffron-robed monks in urban settings. It's the juxtaposition of Buddhist serenity with frenetic city life that brings out the weird and wonderful and, therefore, the smiles.

* The smell of the detergent aisle at the supermarket, where every fresh-scented perfume collides and manages to not smell like a French whorehouse.

* Finding someone else's grocery list in your cart. It's a peek into someone else's life and priorities, a tender and harmless voyeurism.

* Tiny dogs walking really fast. They mean business. They have to take five steps for every one step of their larger counterparts. Busy legs smile.

* Finding the tipping point to solving a puzzle. Come on nerds, you know what I'm talking about. It's that one piece of the jigsaw that makes everything start to come together. It's the square in the Sudoku that makes everything fall into place. It's the 43 Across you thought was so impossible in that crossword but that now makes all the Down clues make sense. It's the sweet victory of all the gears in your brain turning at the right time in the right place.

* Two words: open bar.

* Going to an event and finding out that the free food there is actually really good. You have to go to this grand opening/retirement party/promotional junket/random celebration. You figure you'll make your appearance, chat a bit, and then bypass the melon cubes/floppy shrimp/cold meatballs and get a regular dinner. But what do you know? The food on hand is actually really good. And there are actually places to sit and interesting people to talk with. That totally rates a smile.

* Baby/kid pictures that once really embarrassed you as a teenager. You can almost admire your overbite or your bare bottom in the bathtub or your inappropriately short shorts now, but the existence of these pictures signaled the end of life as you knew it when you were a teenager. You wanted them destroyed. Sure, your smile now may be a little bittersweet, but you can also smile because you didn't tear them to shreds and you eventually came to like your overbite and you wear clothes that fit now and no overzealous photo clerk reported your parents to the feds for kiddie porn. Whew.

* Old men with obviously dyed hair. Give them credit (and a smile) for trying.

* The sweet, plastic smell of the Sanrio store and the effect is has on little girls. For most six-year-old girls, the smell of the Sanrio store is like crack. They would huff the air in there, if they could. It's better than being excited by actual crack or inhalants, so that's good.

* Cats who stare at you with distrust from windows or porches. I love the "STRANGER ALERT" look they give you, as if kidnapping an overweight, crusty-eyed tabby was at the top of your "to do" list for the day.

* Green buds on trees at the start of spring. It's all possibility at this point, that starting place we all desire.

* Finding an intact shell on the beach. Sure, the pieces you find are pretty. But the whole shell is remarkable. Smile for the beauty of it, smile because it made it through the surf, smile because you are holding a former home in your hands.

* People who sing when they are drunk. Singing drunks are a million times better than angry or sullen drunks.

* Kids who sing sea shanties. Sea shanties were songs sung by wizened sailors of yore, meant to keep time in the era when muscle alone kept ships moving and sails flapping in the wind was the only other sound you'd hear on the open ocean. The guys who sang them and made them up were tough, grizzled men and the lyrics ran from bawdy to godly. Today, sea shanties are seen as relatively tame and old-timey and lots of elementary school kids sing them as part of music education. There's something endearing about these soft souls singing the same lines and melodies as hardened workers who'd seen it all and then some.

* Saying "cheese." Of course.

* Saying "wee ah wee wee wee" also approximates a smile.

* Making a wish from an eyelash. Blowing something so ephemeral and delicate from your fingertip out into the world with the hopes of something personal and secret attached is both sweet and hopeful. And worth a smile.

* Reminding yourself that at least you aren't one of the Real Housewives. Seriously, no matter how crappy your life is right now, take comfort in the fact that you aren't on any of those shows. And if you are one of the cast members, have the person reading you these sentences skip to the next one.

* When you have to pee really bad and you finally find a bathroom. Sweet relief if there ever was some.

* When you finally find a public bathroom and it's way nicer and cleaner than you expected. This is even sweeter relief. We've all taken the "any port in a storm" stance and used a sketchy commode in an emergency. But when that emergency is resolved in a clean and even luxurious place? Jackpot.

* Watching chickens run. It's a quick waddle and it's hilarious.

* Getting a raise. Smile because your economic life got a little easier, but also smile because you are getting your due recognition and maybe even for being the great person you are.

* Remembering being a kid on long road trips and imagining you had a blade that would slice through trees and mountains and signs. Was that just me?

* Road trip food. There are certain things you eat only when you are on the road, items you wouldn't think of buying on your regular trip to the grocery store. Slushy drinks. Beef jerky. Weirdly moist muffins wrapped in cellophane. All purchased in the flickering fluorescent light of a gas station. All tokens of that strange time spent getting from one place to another.

* Carnival food. This is more food that you would never eat anywhere else. Corn dogs. Cotton candy. Funnel cake. All carnival food is horrible for you and all of it tastes great when you are eating it. It may make you feel like hell later, but for that moment when you are pulling a tuft of cotton candy from the paper cone and placing it on your tongue to dissolve, it's pure abandon.

* Good luck charms. The little talisman brings you luck and comfort and a smile when you hold it in your hand.

(Continues…)

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Excerpted from "1,047 Reasons to Smile"
by .
Copyright © 2015 Elizabeth Dutton.
Excerpted by permission of Skyhorse Publishing.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

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