Oh, My God! Ninja! A Brit's Take on Arnie, Icky Sex and Other Fun Movie Stuff

I have of late, wherefore I know not, lost all of my mirth...
Man delights not me; no, nor women neither.

In my dreams (and increasingly during my more whimsical waking moments) I wander through Movieland. Sometimes I chat to Kelly McGillis about being in a 4G inverted dive with a MiG-28 while a strung-out Withnail stands close by complaining about going on holiday by mistake. At others a xenomorph near the bus stop rips off Forrest Gump's head before being machine-gunned by the ED-209. I c...