EUrrgh!: Is it Just Me or is Europe merde?

What's wrong with Europe?
Ignoring the fact that the EU is a grotesque, officious money sucking totalitarian machine that devours national sovereignty and pukes out unwanted, unwelcome and intrusive legislation, there's a whole variety of other reasons including:

Shops that open at 10am and close at 4pm - with a two-hour lunch break in between.
Oompah bands.
Restaurant staff with the manners of a gibbon and the sense of urgency of a sloth.
Parisians.
Police forces who are the bastard offspring of...