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HE'S SCARED, SHE'S SCARED

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To one degree or another, all of us are torn between two fundamental urges. On the one hand, each of us has a profound desire to merge with another human being and become part of something larger than self; on the other we have an equally basic need to feel independent, free to make choices without constraint or compromise. Finding a way to balance the urge to merge with the desire to be free is what commitment is all about. Here's the problem: These two needs are diametrically opposed. Fea...