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By Alfie Moore

Narrated by: Alfie Moore

Unabridged — 6 hours

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Overview

Winner of the 2026 Best Comedy ARIA

Ever wondered what sort of a police officer you might make?

Alfie Moore spent eighteen years on the Humberside police force before turning to stand-up comedy. In each episode of this live stand up show, he takes his audience through a scenario based on a real life case, and tasks them with deciding how they would have acted in the circumstances.

From drink driving to a missing gnome, road traffic collisions to the tricky subject of Stop and Search, not to me...