Imagine yourself an orphan at a new Boy's Town facility. You've eaten your gruel, taken a bath and donned your regulation striped government pyjamas. It's a special night. President Gingrich – "Uncle Newt" to all his little orphan friends – has come to read some bedtime stories. Forget the Brothers Grimm, Dr. Seuss and Hans Christian Andersen. Uncle Newt has his own stories to tell, GOP fairy tales that celebrate the Contract with America and caution young people against the evil Welfare State of long ago.