So You Want to Talk about Race

by Ijeoma Oluo

Overview

In this #1 New York Times bestseller, Ijeoma Oluo offers a revelatory examination of race in America

Protests against racial injustice and white supremacy have galvanized millions around the world. The stakes for transformative conversations about race could not be higher. Still, the task ahead seems daunting, and it’s hard to know where to start. How do you tell your boss her jokes are racist? Why did your sister-in-law hang up on you when you had questions about police reform? How do you explain white privilege to your white, privileged friend?

In So You Want to Talk About Race, Ijeoma Oluo guides readers of all races through subjects ranging from police brutality and cultural appropriation to the model minority myth in an attempt to make the seemingly impossible possible: honest conversations about race, and about how racism infects every aspect of American life.

"Simply put: Ijeoma Oluo is a necessary voice and intellectual for these times, and any time, truth be told." ―Phoebe Robinson, New York Times bestselling author of You Can't Touch My Hair

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781580058827
Publisher:	Basic Books
Publication date:	09/24/2019
Pages:	272
Sales rank:	17,155
Product dimensions:	5.40(w) x 8.20(h) x 0.80(d)

About the Author

Ijeoma Oluo is the author of Mediocre and a writer and speaker whose work on race has been featured in the New York Times and the Washington Post. She was named to the 2021 Time 100 Next list, has twice been named to The Root 100, and received the Harvard Humanist of the Year award. She lives in Seattle, Washington.

 

Table of Contents

Preface x

Introduction So you want to talk about race 1

1 Is it really about race? 8

2 What is racism? 23

3 What if i talk about race wrong? 37

4 Why am I always being told to "check my privilege"? 53

5 What is intersectionality and why do I need it? 70

6 Is police brutality really about race? 83

7 How can I talk about affirmative action? 99

8 What is the school-to-prison pipeline? 121

9 Why can't I say the "N" word? 134

10 What is cultural appropriation? 142

11 Why can't I touch your hair? 153

12 What are microaggressions? 162

13 Why are our students so angry? 179

14 What is the model minority myth? 189

15 But what if I hate Al Sharpton? 201

16 I Just got called racist, what do I do now? 212

17 Talking is great, but what else can I do? 225

Acknowledgments 239

Notes 243

A Discussion Guide 249

Editorial Reviews

"I don't think I've ever seen a writer have such an instant, visceral, electric impact on readers. Ijeoma Oluo's intellectual clarity and moral sure-footedness make her the kind of unstoppable force that obliterates the very concept of immovable objects."—Lindy West, New York Times-bestselling author of Shrill

"So You Want to Talk About Race strikes the perfect balance of direct and brutally honest without being preachy or, worse, condescending. Regardless of your comfort level, educational background, or experience when it comes to talking about race, Ijeoma has created a wonderful tool to help broach these conversations and help us work toward a better world for people of color from all walks of life."
—Franchesca Ramsey, host and executive producer of MTV's Decoded and author of Well, That Escalated Quickly

"You are not going to find a more user-friendly examination of race in America than Ijeoma Oluo's fantastic new book. The writing is elegantly simple, which is a real feat when tackling such a thorny issue. Think of it as Race for the Willing-to-Listen."

—Andy Richter, writer and actor

"Ijeoma Oluo is armed with words. Her words are daggers that pierce through injustice, while also disarming you with humor and love."—Hari Kondabolu, comedian, writer, and co-host of Politically Re-Active

"When you need a super team to help you make sense of today's complex conversation on identity and representation, Ijeoma needs to be your number one pick. No one cuts through the chatter with more humor, insight and clarity. No matter the issue, Ijeoma's thinking is always essential reading."
—Jenny Yang, comedian, writer, and co-founder and co-producer of Dis/orient/ed Comedy

"Oluo has created a brilliant and thought-provoking work. Seamlessly connecting deeply moving personal stories with practical solutions, readers will leave with inspiration and tools to help create personal and societal transformations. A necessary read for any white person seriously committed to better understanding race in the United States."
—Matt McGorry, actor

"Straight talk to blacks and whites about the realities of racism. . . A clear and candid contribution to an essential conversation."
—Kirkus Reviews

"Read it, then recommend it to everyone you know."—Harper's Bazaar, "One of 10 Books to Read in 2018"

"Ijeoma Oluo has built a career on speaking truth to power... [here] she offers a guidebook for those who want to confront racism and white supremacy in their everyday lives, but are unsure where to start."
—Bitch

"Impassioned and unflinching"
—Vogue.com

"With this book, Ijeoma Oluo gives us -- both white people and people of color -- that language to engage in clear, constructive, and confident dialogue with each other about how to deal with racial prejudices and biases."
—National Book Review

"One of the few guiding lights to emerge in our post-election landscape...the goal isn't to call out the 'bad' white people and console the 'good' ones, but to raise the bar for all of us committed to equality and justice."
—The Stranger

"White readers will find answers to many of the questions we might be afraid to ask. Readers who are people of color will find their experiences seen, heard, and believed. All readers will find themselves enraptured."—The Denver VOICE

"Oluo's approach to the complex topic of race in America is direct, helpful, and compassionate."—800-CEO-Reads Staff Picks

From the Publisher

11/13/2017
Oluo, an editor at large at the Establishment, assesses the racial landscape of contemporary America in thoughtful essays geared toward facilitating difficult conversations about race. Drawing on her perspective as a black woman raised by a white mother, she shows how race is so interwoven into America’s social, political, and economic systems that it is hard for most people, even Oluo’s well-intentioned mother, to see when they are being oblivious to racism. Oluo gives readers general advice for better dialogue, such as not getting defensive, stating their intentions, and staying on topic. She addresses a range of tough issues—police brutality, the n word, affirmative action, microaggressions—and offers ways to discuss them while acknowledging that they’re a problem. For example, Oluo writes that the common phrase “check your privilege” is an ineffective weapon for winning an argument, as few people really understand the concept of privilege, which is integral to many of the issues of race in America. She concludes by urging people of all colors to fear unexamined racism, instead of fearing the person “who bring that oppression to light.” She’s insightful and trenchant but not preachy, and her advice is valid. For some it may be eye-opening. It’s a topical book in a time when racial tensions are on the rise. (Jan.)

Publishers Weekly

★ 12/01/2017
In her first book, writer and activist Oluo offers direct advice on how to have a conversation about race. She analyzes topics that may lead to contentious conversations, such as cultural appropriation, affirmative action, police brutality, the N-word, microaggressions, and the model minority myth. In doing so, Oluo provides background information on each topic and talking points to allow for having more constructive conversations. With a clever approach that uses anecdotes, facts, and a little humor, the author challenges all readers to assess their own beliefs and perceptions while clearly looking at polarizing issues. She encourages us to overcome the idea of debating someone else without the ability to listen to other perspectives. Most relevant is a sobering and enlightening chapter on checking and recognizing one's privilege. VERDICT A timely and engaging book that offers an entry point and a hopeful approach toward more productive dialog around tough topics. Highly recommended for those interested in race, ethnicity, and social commentary, and anyone wishing to have more insightful conversations.—Tiffeni Fontno, Boston Coll.

Library Journal

★ 06/01/2018
"You are going to screw this up royally. More than once," notes writer and editor Oluo in this slim but potent guide to discussing race. Nevertheless, she urges readers to push past their discomfort; to do otherwise is to accept a society entrenched in systemic racism. The author knows all too well the consequences of ignorance about race. A black queer woman, she not only experiences prejudice but also endures the additional burden of educating those who are skeptical about her oppression. Precise, poignant, and edifying, this primer gives readers much-needed tools, explaining academic concepts such as privilege and intersectionality, debunking harmful myths, and offering concrete ways to confront racism. Blending personal accounts and meticulously cited research, Oluo demonstrates how racism permeates every aspect of society, from education to the police force. She writes with empathy for her readers yet laudably refuses to let those who haven't grappled with their white privilege off the hook—"Don't force people to acknowledge your good intentions," she advises those who have inadvertently offended a person of color. VERDICT Profound yet deeply accessible, this is essential reading for anyone seeking to understand and combat institutional racism.—Mahnaz Dar, School Library Journal

School Library Journal

2017-10-09
Straight talk to blacks and whites about the realities of racism.In her feisty debut book, Oluo, essayist, blogger, and editor at large at the Establishment magazine, writes from the perspective of a black, queer, middle-class, college-educated woman living in a "white supremacist country." The daughter of a white single mother, brought up in largely white Seattle, she sees race as "one of the most defining forces" in her life. Throughout the book, Oluo responds to questions that she has often been asked, and others that she wishes were asked, about racism "in our workplace, our government, our homes, and ourselves." "Is it really about race?" she is asked by whites who insist that class is a greater source of oppression. "Is police brutality really about race?" "What is cultural appropriation?" and "What is the model minority myth?" Her sharp, no-nonsense answers include talking points for both blacks and whites. She explains, for example, "when somebody asks you to ‘check your privilege' they are asking you to pause and consider how the advantages you've had in life are contributing to your opinions and actions, and how the lack of disadvantages in certain areas is keeping you from fully understanding the struggles others are facing." She unpacks the complicated term "intersectionality": the idea that social justice must consider "a myriad of identities—our gender, class, race, sexuality, and so much more—that inform our experiences in life." She asks whites to realize that when people of color talk about systemic racism, "they are opening up all of that pain and fear and anger to you" and are asking that they be heard. After devoting most of the book to talking, Oluo finishes with a chapter on action and its urgency. Action includes pressing for reform in schools, unions, and local governments; boycotting businesses that exploit people of color; contributing money to social justice organizations; and, most of all, voting for candidates who make "diversity, inclusion and racial justice a priority."A clear and candid contribution to an essential conversation.

Kirkus Reviews