This Particular Happiness: A Childless Love Story

This Particular Happiness: A Childless Love Story

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Overview

Knowing where your scars come from doesn’t make them go away. When Jackie Shannon Hollis marries Bill, a man who does not want children, she joyfully commits to a childless life. But soon after the wedding, she returns to the family ranch in rural Oregon and holds her newborn niece. Jackie falls deep into baby love and longing and begins to question her decision. As she navigates the overlapping roles of wife, daughter, aunt, sister, survivor, counselor, and friend, she explores what it really means to choose a different path. This Particular Happiness delves into the messy and beautiful territory of what we keep and what we abandon to make the space for love.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781942436393
Publisher: Forest Avenue Press
Publication date: 10/01/2019
Pages: 294
Sales rank: 341,116
Product dimensions: 5.90(w) x 8.90(h) x 0.60(d)
Age Range: 18 - 10 Years

About the Author

Jackie Shannon Hollis, a lifelong Oregonian, resides with her husband in a home her friends call the tree house. Her education and work as a counselor pushed her to hold up the mirror to her own self. In addition to thinking she would be a mother, she once dreamed of being a June Taylor dancer or a racecar driver.

Table of Contents

I. THE SHOUT OF MOTHERHOOD

1. THE WOMAN THINGS

2. WE PRACTICED, WE PRETENDED

3. GOOD HOUSEKEEPING

4. FLICKER SHADOWS

5. THIS UNLOOSED THING

6. A PLACE TO SLIP THROUGH

7. THE KNOWING WAS IN ME

8. A PLACE FOR A GIRL

9. LEAVING DOESN’T MEAN IT’S GONE FROM YOU


II. MAYBE THIS WILL MAKE ME HAPPY

10. FALLING APART

11. THE MAN HE WILL BE

12. THINGS TO DO WHEN I FALL APART

13. IMPORTANT THINGS TO TELL YOUR DAUGHTERS

14. LIKE A BADGE, LIKE A STAR

15. THE MUDDY GROUND

16. CLEARLY, BOLDLY, NO APOLOGIES

17. LIKE I KNEW WHAT I WAS DOING

18. RED DAYS CIRCLED

19. ANOTHER THING TO DO WHEN I FALL APART

20. GET A GLOW ON

21. LEFT AS IT WAS IT WOULD COME APART

22. THE LAST THING TO DO WHEN I FALL APART

23. THIS IMPORTANT WEIGHT

24. SHINY BOWS OF BLUE AND SILVER

25. HIS PLACE OF BETTER SUNSETS

26. LIKE AN UNASKED PRAYER

27. SECRETS AND CALCULATIONS

28. HIS DREAM CHILD

29. THE QUESTION OF MY FUTURE

30. PRECIOUS THINGS

31. RED INK AND SIDE NOTES

32. ON THE WAY TO A GROWN-UP LIFE

33. FAULT LINE

34. THINGS THAT COME IN THREES

35. STAND UP AND CARRY ON

36. LIGHT IN THE CHAPEL

37. ROOTS TOOK HOLD AND RAN THE LENGTH OF MY BODY

38. OTHER PEOPLE’S CHILDREN

39. CRAZY MAZES

40. THE TIMING WAS RIGHT, I WAS ALMOST SURE


III. A FULL STOP AT THE CORNER

41. WHAT WE KNEW BY NOW

42. THE THINGS PEOPLE THINK

43. THE SYMBOLS OF MY NAME

44. THIS WAS NEW, THIS WAS SCARY, I WANTED MORE

45. AN UGLY, MESSY, HURTFUL THING

46. CONDITIONAL SURRENDER

47. THE PLACE WHERE UNGIVEN LOVE IS HELD

48. THE HEART OF A WITNESS

49. ALL OUT, ALL IN, ALL OVER

50. NO BELTS FOR SAFETY

51. A FULL STOP AT THE CORNER


IV. WHAT COMES WHEN WANTING STOPS

52. MAKE A LIST

53. A WHOLE LOT OF PERFECTION

54. MAYBE A LOVE SOUND, MAYBE A HEARTBREAK

55. THE TURN TO MY HOUSE

56. LANGUAGE I COULD SPEAK SO EASILY

57. THE DAYS OF EASY FALLING

58. HOW EASILY I COULD HURT

59. IN A NEW COUNTRY

60. I DO, NO MATTER WHAT

61. WHAT COMES WHEN WANTING STOPS

62. THE BALANCE OF THINGS

63. THAT LOVE WAS A MEMORY, TOO

64. THIS MOMENT

65. FAULTS CRACKED OPEN

66. THIS PARTICULAR HAPPINESS

67. TEMPORARY ALLOGRAFT

68. MOST OF THE TIME, THIS IS ENOUGH

69. TINY TADPOLES OF LIFE

70. A CURE FOR HIVES

71. BABYLAND

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