Bonds That Make Us Free

Bonds That Make Us Free

by C. Terry Warner

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Bonds That Make Us Free by C. Terry Warner

Life can be sweet. Our relationships with friends, spouses, colleagues, and family members can be wonderfully rewarding. They can also bring heartache, frustration, anxiety, and anger. We all know the difference between times when we feel open, generous, and at ease with people versus times when we are guarded, defensive, and on edge.

Why do we get trapped in negative emotions when it's clear that life is so much fuller and richer when we are free of them?

Bonds That Make Us Free is a ground-breaking book that suggests the remedy for our troubling emotions by addressing their root causes. You'll learn how, in ways we scarcely suspect, we are responsible for feelings like anger, envy, and insecurity that we have blamed on others. (How many times have you said, "You're making me mad!")

Even though we fear to admit this, it is good news. If we produce these emotions, it falls within our power to stop them. But we have to understand our part in them far better than we do, and that is what this remarkable book teaches.

Because the key is seeing truthfully, the book itself is therapeutic. As you read and identify with the many true stories of people who have seen a transformation in their lives, you will find yourself reflecting with fresh honesty upon your relationships. This will bond you to others in love and respect and lift you out of the negative thoughts and feelings that have held you captive. You will feel your heart changing even as you read.

"It would not be accurate to describe this book as supplying the truths upon which we must build our lives," writes author C. Terry Warner. "Instead it shows how we can put ourselves in that receptive, honest, and discerning condition that will enable us, any of us, to find these truths on our own."

Finding these truths is the key to healing our relationships and coming to ourselves, and Bonds That Make Us Free starts us on that great journey.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781606416112
Publisher: Deseret Book Company
Publication date: 09/24/2009
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: NOOK Book
Sales rank: 457,699
File size: 533 KB

About the Author

Dr. C. Terry Warner holds a Ph.D. from Yale University and is a professor of philosophy at Brigham Young University. He has been a visiting senior member of Linacre College, Oxford University, and in 1979 founded The Arbinger Institute, a widely respected group that devotes itself to helping organizations, families, and individuals. he and his wife, Susan, have ten children.

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Bonds That Make Us Free: Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves 4.6 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 12 reviews.
Guest More than 1 year ago
This book is the long awaited for publishing of a manuscript that has already influenced hundreds (thousands?) of people for the better. Warner advocates for a radically different view of human relationships from the typical ones offered by modern psychology and philosophy. The premise of the book comes from the idea that we are primordially obligated to other people. When we fail to fulfill this obligation to others, we open ourselves to rationalization, anger, victim-status, and depression. While most psychological theories concentrate on the hedonistic nature of the individual, Warner makes the argument that we are the author of our own troubles and damaged relationships. For example, imagine that you are driving down the highway and see someone in need pulled over to the side of the road. If we stop, we don't have the need to develop elaborate theories and self-deceiving rationalizations as to why we acted the way we did. However, if we do not stop, we immediately begin to rationalize our actions to justify our unwillingness to help (which we are obligated to do, whether or not we act on that obligation). Warner argues in this book that we must learn to act on what is 'right' for us in the moment--that we already know what is right. Warner's book offers a refreshing alternative to the calculative models of human relationships. If you read this book, you will never be the same. While in manuscript form, Warner allowed these ideas to be circulated. When I would run into someone who had read this, we would immediately have a kinship based upon how the ideas had profoundly changed our world. Read this book!
Guest More than 1 year ago
Once in a long while, amid the untold millions of merely clever, ingenious, entertaining, new, or unique books the world has written for any of its lesser reasons, you will find one that is piercingly and profoundly true, written only for truth¿s sake. This is such a book. While simple, it is anything but simplistic. Careful reading combined with honest self-reflection and genuine efforts to be good will not just uncover many important issues, it will uncover THE issue. This book claims no new revelation on the nature of man and his morality, but it insightfully reasons upon truths the rational will see as self-evident, the religious will recognize from scripture, and the empirically-minded will perceive in the honest assessment own their own experience. Any serious attempt to explain human nature that does not incorporate the truths discussed in this book risks being fundamentally flawed and is assured to be incomplete. I wholeheartedly recommend to you this book.
Guest More than 1 year ago
Somebody once told me that the problem with most all 'self-improvement' books was that everybody else needed to read the same book in order for any change to take place. This book definitely breaks that barrier! Thoughtful, step-by-step analysis of the way we think, the sub-conscious and conscious triggers that we either act on or ignore that shape our relationships with others. And change (for the better) can always take place, because it takes place within ourselves. How we look at those we interact with changes...and always for the better. Easy to read but profound, lots of learning by example, and always better the next time around. You never stop learning (about yourself!) from this one!
Guest More than 1 year ago
For those who know they are in bondage to an addiction of any kind, this is the best sectarian book every written on how to overcome. It's not quick self-help. To the contrary, it's a slow, ponderous, honest visitation with the true inner self, that requires courageous experimentation in the laboratory of life among one's family, friends and fellow humans. Progress is in not focusing on progress, but on the humanity of others. Only then, can one begin to feel the reality that the bondage of addiction can truly be overcome in a lifetime of caring for others. I'll pray for you. Please pray for me. --an addict.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
A friend thought I might enjoy this book and gave me a copy as a gift. What a friend, and what a gift that continues giving in so many ways. Dr. Warner get to the heart of what ails me. When new issues of personal relationships arise with family or friends I can re-read some of the examples provided by Dr. Warner that most closely match my situation and find a course of action that "frees" me to understand the other persons point of view. This binds me to them with the glue of love and respect. To Review #5... if the four previous reviews to yours have caused you to feel that it would be a waste of money to purchase the book, then please allow me to gift a copy to you. It will certainly not be a waste of your time to read it.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Paradigm epiphany game changer, out of the box!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Luvtoread35 More than 1 year ago
This book was wonderful! It brought a great deal of peace and enlightenment into my life. I highly recommend this book!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book was transformational for me. It took my understanding of human relationships and conflicts to a level unimaginable. My understanding of the role I play in conflicts and my ability to now avoid them, plus the compassion I have for others has increased. The true life examples in this book are powerful. If you are ready to take a good look at yourself and truly forgive anyone who has hurt you this is a great book for you.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
December 7th 2009. I am fairly certain that all 4 reviews written prior to mine, were all written by the same person; this person being motivated to push this book. The reviews were so edited and euphemistic that I found none of them useful as they were not biased. All anonymous and all 5 stars? I think not.