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Overview
Need a good laugh? The kind that has you screeching, hooting, holding your splitting sides, and maybe damning your pelvic floor? Then you'll love Paula Houseman's bestselling books!
Cupid F*cks Up is the newly minted title for Apoca[hot]lips. Why change it? Because Cupid does!
Ruth Roth is a straight shooter. Pity Cupid's not.
Smart-mouth Ruth is an inspirational humour columnist for a popular women's magazine. Recently divorced, she has found the love of her life. Without any help, mind you, from the little fat love god. Ruth has decided she herself is her one and only.
And she's in a comfy place. Why wouldn't she be? No need to yell 'Put the bloody toilet seat down!' No need to hoover toe-nail clippings off the carpet.
But then a silver-tongued Prince Charming fronts up in his shiny Merc and tickles her discarded, little-girl fantasies. He tells her their love is written in the stars.
It must be a misprint.
A romance with this particular PC is not so PC! Still ...
Ruth's life plays out more like ancient myth than fairytale. And what hot-blooded woman can resist forbidden fruit?
There's a problem, though. Ruth does not have a hot-blooded mum. Ruth has a pain-in-the-arse mum whose squawking disapproval cranks the taboo up a notch.
All the more reason to take up with the stud! But it means taking on the harpy.
Tensions mount, and even Ruth's man can't protect her from the trash-talking voices in her head. It looks like he can't muzzle his own either. When an earth-shattering revelation causes him to give her grief, it makes her feel like she's dating her mother.
Taking the kind of advice she doles out to her readers is not so easy, and Ruth wonders if this love can survive. More to the point, is it worth the trouble?
Here's what readers are saying:
'Down to earth, real and importantly funny! Houseman's gift to her readers is one that is almost a therapeutic session. She shares insights, emotions and the reality of relationships that both captivates and helps to ease one into looking at things in a different light ... prepare for hours of laughter as well as a book that will stick with you long after you turn the last page. I honestly have not laughed so hard or felt so connected to a story. Absolutely brilliant!'
'If you like Stephanie Plum, you'll adore Ruth Roth - she is one of the funniest characters I've met in fiction.'
'The book takes the reader on a wild ride. I laughed aloud, I couldn't stop reading - and I absolutely loved the writing ... It's one of the funniest, sexiest romantic comedies I've ever read. Highly recommended!'
'It's a joyful and fun ride and Paula Houseman has knocked it out the park.'
'Touching and thoughtfully written, you will cry - although I guarantee most of those tears will be from hilarity than heartbreak.'
'Ruth thinks fairy tales are 'bull***t' and wishes the damsel would 'grow some balls'. Just as well she herself already has them because she needs to 'man-up' when she ends up in a kind of distorted fairy tale that stretches the imagination! I read this in one afternoon, couldn't put it down.'
'How great is it to have a smart mouth as your GPS for navigating life's difficulties, especially dangerous romances! Lots of crazy characters that you either love or hate but can't ignore. And some hot action that you DEFINITELY can't ignore! I LMAO whilst reading.'
Product Details
ISBN-13: | 9780648283607 |
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Publisher: | Wildwoman Publishing |
Publication date: | 07/31/2018 |
Series: | Ruth Roth Series Book 2 , #2 |
Pages: | 336 |
Product dimensions: | 5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.75(d) |
About the Author
She found she was a natural with the double entendres (God knows she'd been in enough trouble as a child for dirty wordplay).
As a published writer of earthy chick lit and romantic comedy, Paula gets to bend, twist, stretch, and juice up universal experiences to shape reality the way she wants it, even if it is only in books. But at the same time, she can make it more real, so that her readers feel part of the sisterhood. Or brotherhood (realness has nothing to do with gender).
Through her books, Paula also wants to help the reader escape into life and love's comic relief. And who doesn't need to sometimes?
Her style is a tad Monty Pythonesque because she adores satire. It helps defuse all those gaffes and thoughts that no one is too proud of.
Paula lives in Sydney, Australia with her husband. No other creatures. The kids have flown the nest and the dogs are long gone.
Table of Contents
PART ONE
A Tabooboo Romance
Prologue ...................................................................................... 3
1 Once Upon a Bloody Time ................................................... 5
2 The Balls in His Court ............................................................ 10
3 Portnoy’s Complaint ............................................................ 19
4 A Novel Whopper ................................................................ 28
5 More D & M, Less S & M ...................................................... 35
6 Truth or Dare.......................................................................... 42
7 Eye Spy with My Little i ......................................................... 46
8 Fifty Shades of Fray .............................................................. 55
9 Slam Dunk .............................................................................. 61
10 Coming Together ............................................................... 70
11 In the Dead of Night .......................................................... 78
12 Down the Rabbit Hole ...................................................... 90
13 Seeing the Light .................................................................. 96
14 The (Pink) Elephant in the Room ................................... 103
15 I Love You … Now Piss Off! ............................................. 110
16 The Whole Ruth & Nothing but the Ruth ..................... 116
PART TWO
Alphabet Soup
17 Adopting New ’Tudes ..................................................... 125
18 Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner ...................................... 130
19 Sticky Situations ................................................................ 144
20 Hectoring ........................................................................... 152
21 A Fate Worse Than Death .............................................. 169
22 Roots ................................................................................... 176
23 Beware of Geeks Baring Gifts ........................................ 183
24 The Potz Calling the Kettle Black .................................. 193
25 Skin Crawl .......................................................................... 200
26 Cut ’N’ Paste ..................................................................... 207
27 Rats in the Belfry ............................................................... 213
PART THREE
Waking Over the Coals
28 Persona Non Gwata ....................................................... 221
29 Her Small, Slim Grewish Wedding ................................. 228
30 Pyjama (Third) Parties ...................................................... 246
31 What If? Whatev. What the Fuck! ................................ 256
32 Not So Black and White .................................................. 266
33 Rules of Engagement ..................................................... 275
34 Out, Damned Spot! ......................................................... 282
35 The Apple Doesn’t Fall Far from the Pruned Tree ...... 289
36 Simply Smashing ............................................................... 297
37 Bag of Tricks ...................................................................... 304
38 Coming Full Circle ........................................................... 308
39 In the Dark ......................................................................... 319