2024-04-04
A 20-something social media star shreds misogynist male privilege in the name of feminist freedom.
Afualo never intended to become famous on TikTok. Her goal had been to become a football reporter because football was home to many members of her Samoan community. Then, dismissal from her dream job, followed in quick succession by the Covid-19 pandemic, changed her plans. “The reality of it going down the drain so quickly and aggressively crushed my spirit in ways I had never anticipated,” she writes. The author joined TikTok and posted humorous tirades against “awful men who attack marginalized people on the internet for no reason,” and she went viral. In her debut book, Afualo continues her mission to uproot the internalized biases actively cultivated by patriarchy, most of which harm gender minorities. Though born into a fundamentally matriarchal culture, the author was influenced enough by white patriarchy that for a short time during adolescence, she became the plus-sized “pick-me girl” who sided with boys to earn validation. That changed in college when she learned the power of female friendships and turned into a “crusader for other women.” However, Afualo’s newfound wisdom did not prevent her from feeling pressured to find love and becoming involved in a bad relationship with a controlling cheater of a man. Yet that experience—along with a supportive family—helped her break free from the conditioning women receive to prioritize men at all costs and accept toxic behavior. Though this memoir is at times youthfully self-aggrandizing, its strength lies in the validation it offers women: “It’s okay if you want to be mad…if you want to yell back…if you want to be a bitch to men who are disrespectful to you.” The message will undoubtedly resonate with her fans and anyone sick of rampant misogyny.
An unapologetically energizing reading experience.