Path to Freedom: Leading a Life of Joy, Impact, and Abundance

by Nader Vasseghi

Overview

Throughout life, we're invited to go through various levels of transformation, but many of us decide not to answer the calls. Instead, we stay in our comfy boxes where everything makes sense. In doing so, we thwart and limit our world of possibilities, and don't get a chance to move beyond our caterpillar like shells and turn into the beatiful butterfly that we are meant to be.

In Path to Freedom, Nader Vasseghi reflects on his own journey of transformation and distills a practical set of insights and guideposts to help readers discover and connect to their purpose, access and bring out fullness of their creativity, and lead a life of joy, impact and abundance.

The path to freedom starts with opening to and recognizing our own true self, finding our way of being and feeling at home with it, and honoring and living in alignment with our heart's deepest desires.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781504390873
Publisher:	BalboaPress
Publication date:	11/28/2017
Pages:	142
Product dimensions:	5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.33(d)

About the Author

Nader is an Entrepreneur, CEO and Executive Coach based in Silicon Valley, California. He is the founder of Cnergist Inc., an Executive Coaching firm, committed to transforiming and elevating the lives of business leaders and high achievers, and the founder of SelfOptima Inc. a web platform for optimal health. He was the founder and CEO of AuroraNetica which was acquired by Cisco where he went on to lead a business unit. Nader has over 35 years of experience in executive roles in public and private companies. He served as an adjust professor at Palo Alto University, Business Psychology progaram. He is a Vistage chair, speaker, workshop, leader, certified hypnotherapist and energy medicine practitioner. He enjoys composing music, painting and gardening in his spare time. You can reach him at www.cnergist.com or at www.nadervasseghi.com. 

 

Read an Excerpt

CHAPTER 1

The Joy Is Inside You

With that in mind, what does joy mean to you? What brings you joy? What makes you feel joyful? For me, it is sitting by the window, watching trees and clouds, listening to soothing music, and writing, as I am doing now. It is being by the ocean, feeling a flower or a butterfly, or feeling my own sensations in the hot baths of Esalen. It is watching my kids grow and seeing their smiles, excitement, hopes, and dreams. It is creating a work of art, turning confusion to clarity, and manifesting a vision to reality. It is mending a broken heart and reigniting a hopeless soul. It is creating intimacy with the other, where egos dissolve and boundaries vanish. It is appreciation of beauty in all its forms.

What takes our joy away? One of the main contributors is worry. Worry comes from fear, insecurity, and not meeting one's expectations. When there is worry, there is no place for joy. All the space is taken by worry and fear. But where does this joy come from in the first place, and how does it vanish all of a sudden? All these external situations that seem to create joy in us create a resonance to our own soul's vibration, so we can see and feel the magic in that moment.

"Everything is energy and that's all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics." — Albert Einstein

Have you noticed that when we are in the state of fear or worry, the same, previously joyful situation does not invoke any joy in us? We are not resonating with that vibration; we are not feeling it. There is no space to allow and take in the magic of the moment. Our minds and bodies are preoccupied with worry and fear. We are carrying the old, heavy baggage of our past as we look at our uncertain and insecure future. But how can we clear ourselves of this fog? How can we free ourselves of this uninvited guest?

Be Comfortable with the Uncomfortable

"This being human is a guest house. Every morning is a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor ... Welcome and entertain them all. Treat each guest honorably. The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond." — Rumi

We can do it by not running away. By observing, accepting, and realizing. By consciously getting ourselves out of this maze and wake up to our true state of being. By realizing that we cannot change the past, but we can change our perspective of it. We cannot avoid insecurity and fear, but we can learn to be friends with it, take in their guidance, and move forward through action. By realizing that worry is an unhealthy mental reaction to fear and insecurity, which depletes us of our energy and vitality. We always have a choice to make: we can accept the reality as it is, and then we can choose to either shift from the inside or change the outside to a place that feels better to us. Reinhold Niebuhr captured this beautifully in a prayer.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.

You may ask, "Is it possible to be in state of joy all the time?" I don't know, but I do know that we can increase the amount of time we enter and stay in joy. That does not mean we won't have any setbacks or challenges in our lives. Rather, we face them with courage and equanimity, and we operate from a state of internal strength and joy. By consciously taking ourselves or our minds away from worry and fear-generating situations, we create space and allow joy to sprout from within. We awaken the joy inside us.

One of the main reasons for losing our joy is losing the connection to our essence. We then start comparing, judging, and doubting, and we lose our anchor, our sense of worth, and our direction. We feel lost, insecure, in need, and trapped in the land of fear and worry. We then seek approval and comfort, feeling a void that needs to be filled by external people or objects. Although this may feel uncomfortable, running away is not a solution. What irritates us often points us to aspects of ourselves that have come to surface for us to address.

Live from Your Essence

Let's explore ways we can connect to our essence. The first requisite is to stay curious about and open to our own experiences. We must see and appreciate the beauty that is in and around us. Beauty points us to our essence. When we don't see the magic in our lives, how can we see the essence of anything, let alone ourselves? Trust that there is a higher force — call it spirit, universe, divine, consciousness — and that we are not separate from it; we are always connected and guided by it. It resides in us, and we reside in it. The problem is not a lack of connection; it is lack of our awareness to the connection. It is ignoring and not trusting its presence.

I am not suggesting blind faith or a fake belief system. Our trust needs to be built on our personal experiences and observations. Not because it is written in scriptures, or even because it is scientifically proven. The only legitimate reason to believe is through observation and integration of our own experiences.

We are often so busy and entangled with life that we take things for granted and don't let our experiences touch our deepest core. We either become numb and foggy to our own experiences, or we are so rushed and determined to get from point A to point B that we miss the process and all the support we receive during the journey to get there. In either case, our experiences will not make any meaningful impressions on us and therefore do not reveal their teachings to us.

In order to help realize this connection, review your life and recall blissful moments of when you experienced the universe's love and support, or when you were touched by beauty. You may have experienced this during the hardest challenges and darkest times of your life. You may have felt that despite the hardship, you were protected by a divine force. Or you may have experienced this through a spark of love with another person and felt in unity and harmony. Or it could be as simple as a quiet, serene walk in nature where you could sense the grace and presence of something beyond. Spend a few minutes to recall such experiences when you felt the presence of a divine force. It is during these moments that we have a clear sense of a connection, a reflection of our essence back to us.

Allow and Follow

Once we get a sense of this connection, we then need to allow and follow. We need to get out of our minds and get into our hearts. We need to connect to our desires, aspirations, and dreams. We need to respect them, live them, and bring them forth. They are our guides and are the blueprints of our essence. Once we do that, we stop asking and start doing. We stop being a seeker and start being a giver. Asking continues to put us in the state of lack. Doing puts us in the flow. We will only find ourselves through doing, and doing can only happen in the now. Surrendering to this moment and responding wholeheartedly to what this moment is offering us without judgment or expectations. It's acting from our essence and offering our best selves to this moment. Such action is often effortless and natural because it comes from our essence, leading us to the state of joy.

Listen to your feelings, sensations, and aspirations. See where they are leading you. Sometimes they are asking you to step outside your comfort zone, to expand and explore. Sometimes they are asking you to take refuge, to incubate and wait. Sometimes they are asking you to go against the odds with courage and determination. The key is to respect and honor them. Listen, pay attention, and consider their guidance seriously. Most important, take action. You strengthen the connection to your essence by taking their guidance seriously, putting them to test, and acting on them.

Sometimes your instincts, intuitions, and gut feelings know in a more direct way. In our Western society, more often than not, we tend to ignore our intuitions and gut feelings in favor of logic and analysis. However, we must realize that they are not mutually exclusive. By utilizing both aspects of awareness, we will have a better grasp of the situation and a better chance of acting out of wisdom. Real-life situations often demand we make decisions based on incomplete information or even nonexistent data. This is where we can really leverage our intuition, which operates in a different realm and has access to information that our logical minds do not. You can think of it as whole brain thinking or alignment of heart and mind. Although this is a two-way communication pathway, the heart actually sends more signals to the brain than the brain sends to the heart. The nervous system within the heart enables it to learn, remember, and make decisions independent of the brain's cerebral cortex. There has been ample research on the heart-mind connection that suggests the heart-brain has a way of knowing without any reason or information.

"Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary." — Steve Jobs

Be Kind to Yourself

Sometimes we are more understanding and kind to others than to ourselves. We may feel it is a selfish act to indulge ourselves with joy, but with that mindset we are blocking joy from entering into our space. We need not only to allow but also to invite joy to come into our lives. One of the enemies of joy is the voice of judgment, the authoritative critique that is always downgrading, judging, and criticizing. Simply be aware of this voice and choose to not react to it. You don't need to get tense about it; treat it as a frustrated kid who wants to be heard. You can bring it to your awareness, but let it pass. Then there is judgment and criticism of others, not only verbally but also energetically. Know that people mostly project their own lack and sensitivities onto others. Be aware of this mechanism in others and, most important, in yourself.

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." — Carl Jung

Learn to protect yourself against toxicities, both coming from outside as well as self-inflicted. When someone around you is grumpy, tense, or angry, the person might consciously or unconsciously want to release some of that energy onto you. Again, be aware of the situation and be compassionate, but realize and maintain your own boundary, and do not let energies that do not belong to you invade into your space. Maintain a neutral separation while showing understanding and compassion.

Take a few minutes and make yourself a joy list. Write down anything that comes to mind, big or small. Don't overanalyze, judge, or consider the how. Be as selfish as you want to be. Once you are done, review the list and pick a few that resonates with you and that you can take action over the next few days. Make a commitment to pick one joy activity each day during the next seven days. Observe your joy factor and see how taking simple conscious actions each day can shift your state of being toward joy. Nurture and feed yourself each day with joy, even if it is just for a few minutes. This is an especially effective way to move your mood to a more joyous state and make it a habit. The next time you feel down or tired, pick an item from the list and act on it. Experiment on yourself and experience the effects.

Another practice that can be even more powerful is to be the messenger of joy to another. We are wired to feel joy when we bring joy to another. Take a few minutes and make a list of what you think makes the people around you happy and joyful — family, friends, coworkers, and strangers. Review the list and pick a few that you can take action over the next few days and commit to acting on them. Observe the effects on them and on yourself. A point of precaution here: view this exercise as random acts of kindness and have no expectations or attachments to outcomes. Be mindful to keep your ego out of it.

Express Yourself

When we are in our creative zones and are freely expressing ourselves, we feel joy and aliveness. This is natural because we are creative beings by design. When we open our channels of expression and creativity, we are allowing our genuine selves to come to life and present themselves. Unfortunately for most of us, this is one of the qualities that we lose early in our lives. Our families, peers, and schools, and society overall, give us clear boundaries and definitions of what is acceptable and proper (often with good intentions). We are labeled, judged, scolded, and chastised as soon as we cross the line of what is considered the norm. Over time the creative child within decides to hide away and not risk it anymore. Our fire within slowly dims in order for us to be considered cool and accepted by the community.

However, our joy factor is directly proportional to the level of freedom in expressing who we really are. We can be meeting all the outward standards of success and comfort, but deep down something is missing because we are not living our true selves.

What are your natural channels of expression? They are activities that come to you effortlessly and give you joy. Maybe you have not given your creative child within the opportunity and permission to play and explore itself. In that case, it is time to play, stay curious, and experiment. Give yourself the freedom to try new things, to be bold and courageous, to make mistakes and be okay with it, and to bring out your gifts. It is only through action that we can discover what resonates with us, what wants to come out, and what channels of expression are most suited for us. The most difficult part of this journey is the initial few steps to overcome the inertia and habit, to open our minds to possibilities, to shift our state of mind and make the initial move. Once we start walking, the action itself draws us and nurtures us with more energy. We will talk more about this in part two of the book.

Face Your Fears

Fear is a natural emotion and is designed to protect us and our loved ones from danger. The obvious example is that it triggers our fight-or-flight response in the presence of a real threat. It serves a useful and fundamental purpose, and without it we would be extinct as a race long ago.

However, in this day and age, the problem is our fear mechanism is being constantly triggered based on trivial situations, and mostly in reaction to imaginary threats. It is now a tool that the ego uses to protect itself.

We are stood up for an appointment, and our ego is hurt. In response we get frustrated and are ready to fight. Our opinions are not heard at work, we don't get the promotion we deserve, or we get fired. Our ego gets tensed up and wounded, and we are ready to break someone's neck. Our teenage kids ignore us, insult us, berate us, and make us feel powerless and helpless. Our ego is shattered, and we get furious and want to teach them a lesson they will not forget.

If only we could observe the situation from a distance and stay with the hurt, we would realize fight or flight is not the answer. Getting angry and tense does not serve us any good and will only aggravate the situation.

There are past fears and traumas that have been imprinted in our bodies and are looking for triggers to bring themselves back to life. We project, we judge, we criticize, and we prosecute. By doing so, we create our own stories to protect the ego from being broken again.

Today, most of our fears are ego based, not survival based. It does not serve any purpose other than giving us more pain and suffering. Instead of compassion and understanding, we get cruel and righteous. Instead of acceptance and allowing, we want to control and fight back. Instead of forgiveness and love, we are immersed in hatred and revenge. Instead of expansion and challenge, we get into contraction and withdrawal. The irony is that as long as we don't face our fears head-on, they become stronger and completely run our lives, often without our notice. The only way to break this chain is to accept our fears and, in spite of their presence, walk through them and act out of wisdom. All it takes it a mindset shift and a willingness to act and experiment. Oftentimes we realize that by doing so, our fears suddenly fizzle out and don't have a hold on us anymore. Our fears are holding us back from what we can be. They are limiting us, numbing us, rationalizing us, and wasting our potential.

(Continues…)

---

Excerpted from "Path To Freedom"
by .
Copyright © 2017 Nader Vasseghi.
Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

---

Table of Contents

Dedication, v,
Introduction, 1,
PART 1 JOY, 3,
The Joy Is Inside You, 5,
Be Comfortable with the Uncomfortable, 6,
Live from Your Essence, 7,
Allow and Follow, 8,
Be Kind to Yourself, 10,
Express Yourself, 11,
Face Your Fears, 12,
What Is Holding You Back?, 14,
Pivot, 15,
Find Your Magnet, 16,
Right Relationships, 18,
Relationship with Time, 20,
Don't Take Yourself so Seriously, 22,
Practice: Connect, 24,
Tools and Resources, 30,
PART 2 IMPACT, 33,
First Things First, 35,
Identify Your Gifts, 36,
Fullness of Your Creativity, 37,
Live the Unique You, Courageously, 39,
Creative Incubation, 40,
Follow Your Bliss, 41,
Make a Difference, 43,
Learn to Say No, 44,
Take Action, 45,
Priority and Focus, 46,
Dream a New World, 48,
Live Your Legacy, 49,
Practice: Create, 50,
Tools and Resources, 55,
PART 3 ABUNDANCE, 57,
Time and Money, 59,
Create Space, 60,
Be in Gratitude, 62,
Love Yourself, 63,
Resonate and Attract, 65,
Clarity and Purity, 66,
Intensity and Alignment, 67,
Response-ability, 68,
Patience, 69,
Balance, 69,
Give and Receive, 70,
Honor Yourself, 71,
Practice: Celebrate, 72,
Tools and Resources, 76,
PART 4 FREEDOM, 79,
Prisoners of Our Minds, 81,
Look at the Whole, 82,
Magic of Healing, 83,
My journey of self healing, 84,
Health Is Freedom, 85,
It's Simple, 87,
Physical Activity, 88,
Nutrition, 89,
Mental, 92,
Emotional, 95,
Rest, 96,
Meaning, 98,
Practice: Optimum Health, 100,
Tools and Resources, 103,
Conclusion, 105,
References, 107,