What If I Can Never Stand Up for Myself?

Sometimes trauma responses don't improve with exposure, insight, therapy techniques, or trying harder.

For years I approached conflict believing I had to perform self-advocacy in the moment, and do it well, or I was failing. Instead, I often froze, caught between trying to respond in a way that met bystander approval, and the pressure to change the bully's behavior by effectively shutting them down. Sometimes I was so frozen, though, I couldn't even remember to breathe, no matter how many ti...