If you're in a troubled marriage, divorce might seem like a reasonable option. But in most cases, it's a calamity. Shows like Bravo's Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce and HBO's Divorce normalize the dissolution of marriage, making couples feel that divorce can be a happy new beginning. Celebrities suggest a norm that divorce is not only acceptable but advisable. Gwyneth Paltrow's "conscious uncoupling" makes divorce seem trendy and enlightened. Today, couples are even throwing "divorce parties"—complete with invitations and caterers!
Enough, says psychologist Diane Medved. If you're hurtling down the road to divorce, the first thing to do is to put on the brakes. Don't let your spouse, your friends, or the "divorce industry" rush you into ending your marriage. Take a deep breath and read this book. Drawing on three decades of clinical and personal experience, Dr. Medved will show why you should save—and revitalize—your marriage. She expertly unmasks the threats to marriage, including hookup apps that promise non-committal sex, and legions of professionals who are financially invested in your divorce. She punctures one-by-one the arguments in favor of divorce, proving that "the good divorce" is a myth.
Don't Divorce is the antidote to a pro-divorce culture, the tool that will empower you to revive a dying marriage and recover the happiness that seems out of reach.
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About the Author
Diane Medved, Ph.D. is a clinical psychologist, author of five major non-fiction books, blogger, and nationally-known speaker and media personality. Dr. Medved blogs on her own site, “Searching for Bright Light,” and writes columns for USA Today , Truth Revolt and MichaelMedved.com about social media, family and politics. She is a guest host for her husband’s nationally syndicated radio program, “The Michael Medved Show” that reaches 4.5 million listeners daily, and has appeared on myriad other programs including “The Rush Limbaugh Show,” “CBS Morning News,” “Good Morning America," “The Today Show,” "Oprah," and "Larry King."
Dr. Medved is the author of The Case Against Divorce , Children: To Have or Have Not? , and First Comes Love: Deciding Whether or Not to Get Married and is the co-author (with her husband Michael Medved) of Saving Childhood: Protecting Our Children from the National Assault on Innocence and (with former Vice President Dan Quayle) The American Family: Discovering the Values that Make Us Strong , which quickly appeared at #1 on the Los Angeles Times Best-Seller list (first printing 350,000 copies).
She lives in Seattle, Washington.
Table of Contents
Why You Need to Read This Book xi
Section 1 Beware the Perils for Marriage 1
1 Stop the Divorce Momentum 3
2 The Three Divorce Magnets 23
3 The Danger of Detaching Marriage from Parenthood 35
4 The Divorce Industry: Friends and Helpers You Never Wanted to Know 47
Section 2 Why Not Divorce: Reasons to Avoid a Split 65
5 Hazardous to Your Health 67
6 "I Got the Shaft": The Financial Cost of Divorce 73
7 Bad for Your Spirit 81
8 A Crucial Differences Divorce With and Without Children 91
9 If You Love Your Children 99
10 The Ruinous Ripples of Divorce 147
Section 3 All the (Wrong) Reasons: Answering the Arguments for Divorce 167
11 When Divorce Is Necessary: How to Know When to Quit 169
12 It's About You 185
13 "It's All About Me" 203
14 "It's Nobody's Fault" 213
15 There's No Such Thing as a Good Divorce 227
Section 4 Fixing a Hole-Why You Should Stay Married 239
16 "Do Your Duty" or "Follow Your Heart"? 241
17 Divorce Won't Make You Happier 253
18 The Grass Isn't Greener on the Singles Side of the Fence 273
19 Rebuilding Trust after Betrayal 285
20 No Marriage Is Perfect: How to Be Happy Anyway 303
21 Life's Finest Accomplishment 323