If Only I'd Known: How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth

This therapist-written and recommended 3-part book will give you the insights and strategies to understand the inner workings of a narcissist, heal from narcissistic abuse, and experience sustainable post-traumatic growth.

In relationships, have you ever found yourself:

  • Feeling like something is "off," but not being able to explain why?
  • Leaving conversations feeling more confused than when you started them?
  • Mentally rehearsing the "best" way to bring something up so your partner won't get mad?
  • Constantly ruminating on how to "make sense" of what you feel and what's happening?
  • Trying every communication strategy, but nothing seems to work?
  • Feeling "not enough" no matter how hard you try?
  • Narcissistic abuse creates a tidal wave of confusion, hypervigilance, and overthinking. You have trouble thinking clearly, remembering things, or taking in new information. You feel frazzled, foggy, and flawed.

    And because these changes are happening to you-you begin to wonder:

    What's wrong with me?

    Why can't I make this relationship work?

    Am I fundamentally broken?

    And that's exactly how narcissistic abuse works-it happens so subtly that you believe the insecurities you're experiencing are "you" instead of "what's happening" to you.

    You think there's something wrong with you.

    You think you need to change or get better.

    You think they'll grow out of it.

    You think no one else understands.

    Narcissistic abuse is a multilayered attack on your sense of self-a dismantling of who you are and what you believe you're worth.

    This book covers unique information related to narcissistic abuse, including:

  • How different narcissistic types love bomb
  • Cognitive, emotional, behavioral, and physiological warning signs that you're being abused
  • How and why narcissistic trauma bonds form and the process to untangle yourself from these binding relationships
  • How to set boundaries even if you're an empath or highly sensitive person
  • The most common reasons you stay stuck and how to get "unstuck"
  • If you've ever wondered:

    How did I get into this relationship?

    I didn't experience an intense love-bombing phase-are they still a narcissist?

    I'm such a people pleaser-how can I set better boundaries?

    What if healing isn't possible for me?

    I feel so lost and broken-where do I even start?

    This book is for you!

    Praise for If Only I'd Known!

    "Chelsey is able to describe exactly what I went through and what others have endured in a concise way. It is so important for mental health professionals to shine a light on this insidious form of domestic violence so that our clients, readers, and followers can get the validation and support that they so desperately need. She is an advocate for trauma survivors and her writing will help so many people to become empowered and heal." -Vanessa Reiser, LCSW, Narcissistic/Cult Abuse Expert

    "If you've ever been touched by a toxic workplace, tyrannical boss, or undermining colleague, you need this book. With clinical expertise, relatable stories, and fresh insights, Chelsey helps us all recognize, recover, and resist narcissistic individuals at every level." -Dorie Clark, Wall Street Journal bestselling author of The Long Game and executive education faculty, Columbia Business School

    "1143620537"
    If Only I'd Known: How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth

    This therapist-written and recommended 3-part book will give you the insights and strategies to understand the inner workings of a narcissist, heal from narcissistic abuse, and experience sustainable post-traumatic growth.

    In relationships, have you ever found yourself:

  • Feeling like something is "off," but not being able to explain why?
  • Leaving conversations feeling more confused than when you started them?
  • Mentally rehearsing the "best" way to bring something up so your partner won't get mad?
  • Constantly ruminating on how to "make sense" of what you feel and what's happening?
  • Trying every communication strategy, but nothing seems to work?
  • Feeling "not enough" no matter how hard you try?
  • Narcissistic abuse creates a tidal wave of confusion, hypervigilance, and overthinking. You have trouble thinking clearly, remembering things, or taking in new information. You feel frazzled, foggy, and flawed.

    And because these changes are happening to you-you begin to wonder:

    What's wrong with me?

    Why can't I make this relationship work?

    Am I fundamentally broken?

    And that's exactly how narcissistic abuse works-it happens so subtly that you believe the insecurities you're experiencing are "you" instead of "what's happening" to you.

    You think there's something wrong with you.

    You think you need to change or get better.

    You think they'll grow out of it.

    You think no one else understands.

    Narcissistic abuse is a multilayered attack on your sense of self-a dismantling of who you are and what you believe you're worth.

    This book covers unique information related to narcissistic abuse, including:

  • How different narcissistic types love bomb
  • Cognitive, emotional, behavioral, and physiological warning signs that you're being abused
  • How and why narcissistic trauma bonds form and the process to untangle yourself from these binding relationships
  • How to set boundaries even if you're an empath or highly sensitive person
  • The most common reasons you stay stuck and how to get "unstuck"
  • If you've ever wondered:

    How did I get into this relationship?

    I didn't experience an intense love-bombing phase-are they still a narcissist?

    I'm such a people pleaser-how can I set better boundaries?

    What if healing isn't possible for me?

    I feel so lost and broken-where do I even start?

    This book is for you!

    Praise for If Only I'd Known!

    "Chelsey is able to describe exactly what I went through and what others have endured in a concise way. It is so important for mental health professionals to shine a light on this insidious form of domestic violence so that our clients, readers, and followers can get the validation and support that they so desperately need. She is an advocate for trauma survivors and her writing will help so many people to become empowered and heal." -Vanessa Reiser, LCSW, Narcissistic/Cult Abuse Expert

    "If you've ever been touched by a toxic workplace, tyrannical boss, or undermining colleague, you need this book. With clinical expertise, relatable stories, and fresh insights, Chelsey helps us all recognize, recover, and resist narcissistic individuals at every level." -Dorie Clark, Wall Street Journal bestselling author of The Long Game and executive education faculty, Columbia Business School

    18.99 In Stock
    If Only I'd Known: How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth

    If Only I'd Known: How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth

    by Chelsey Brooke Cole
    If Only I'd Known: How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth

    If Only I'd Known: How to Outsmart Narcissists, Set Guilt-Free Boundaries, and Create Unshakeable Self-Worth

    by Chelsey Brooke Cole

    Paperback

    $18.99 
    • SHIP THIS ITEM
      Qualifies for Free Shipping
    • PICK UP IN STORE
      Check Availability at Nearby Stores

    Related collections and offers


    Overview

    This therapist-written and recommended 3-part book will give you the insights and strategies to understand the inner workings of a narcissist, heal from narcissistic abuse, and experience sustainable post-traumatic growth.

    In relationships, have you ever found yourself:

  • Feeling like something is "off," but not being able to explain why?
  • Leaving conversations feeling more confused than when you started them?
  • Mentally rehearsing the "best" way to bring something up so your partner won't get mad?
  • Constantly ruminating on how to "make sense" of what you feel and what's happening?
  • Trying every communication strategy, but nothing seems to work?
  • Feeling "not enough" no matter how hard you try?
  • Narcissistic abuse creates a tidal wave of confusion, hypervigilance, and overthinking. You have trouble thinking clearly, remembering things, or taking in new information. You feel frazzled, foggy, and flawed.

    And because these changes are happening to you-you begin to wonder:

    What's wrong with me?

    Why can't I make this relationship work?

    Am I fundamentally broken?

    And that's exactly how narcissistic abuse works-it happens so subtly that you believe the insecurities you're experiencing are "you" instead of "what's happening" to you.

    You think there's something wrong with you.

    You think you need to change or get better.

    You think they'll grow out of it.

    You think no one else understands.

    Narcissistic abuse is a multilayered attack on your sense of self-a dismantling of who you are and what you believe you're worth.

    This book covers unique information related to narcissistic abuse, including:

  • How different narcissistic types love bomb
  • Cognitive, emotional, behavioral, and physiological warning signs that you're being abused
  • How and why narcissistic trauma bonds form and the process to untangle yourself from these binding relationships
  • How to set boundaries even if you're an empath or highly sensitive person
  • The most common reasons you stay stuck and how to get "unstuck"
  • If you've ever wondered:

    How did I get into this relationship?

    I didn't experience an intense love-bombing phase-are they still a narcissist?

    I'm such a people pleaser-how can I set better boundaries?

    What if healing isn't possible for me?

    I feel so lost and broken-where do I even start?

    This book is for you!

    Praise for If Only I'd Known!

    "Chelsey is able to describe exactly what I went through and what others have endured in a concise way. It is so important for mental health professionals to shine a light on this insidious form of domestic violence so that our clients, readers, and followers can get the validation and support that they so desperately need. She is an advocate for trauma survivors and her writing will help so many people to become empowered and heal." -Vanessa Reiser, LCSW, Narcissistic/Cult Abuse Expert

    "If you've ever been touched by a toxic workplace, tyrannical boss, or undermining colleague, you need this book. With clinical expertise, relatable stories, and fresh insights, Chelsey helps us all recognize, recover, and resist narcissistic individuals at every level." -Dorie Clark, Wall Street Journal bestselling author of The Long Game and executive education faculty, Columbia Business School


    Product Details

    ISBN-13: 9798988409700
    Publisher: Portwell Press
    Publication date: 08/15/2023
    Pages: 284
    Sales rank: 63,899
    Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.64(d)

    About the Author

    Chelsey Brooke Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, coach, speaker, and author specializing in narcissistic abuse and relationship trauma. Chelsey has spoken at internationally recognized universities, and counseling and HR conferences on these topics, as well as on emotional intelligence and healthy relationships. Chelsey is also a Certified Partner Trauma Therapist, Registered Play Therapist, Level 1 Trained Gottman Method Couples Therapist, and board member of the Yow Foundation Inc. Chelsey's content provides support to thousands of narcissistic abuse survivors each day through her thriving online community. Learn more about working with Chelsey or her resources at www.chelseybrookecole.com
    From the B&N Reads Blog

    Customer Reviews