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Life Coaching for Analog Deities

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"Well, I'm the Software That Runs the Universe. He logged in first, so he is God..." The voice paused then continued in a tone that left her shifting uncomfortably in her racing-flame-decorated black Converse sneakers, "...and you're not!"

Genesis 0:0, In the Beginning

According to the Software That Runs the Universe, the place is no longer worth the trouble. Its solution? Reboot everything. The Software doubts anyone will care.

The Archangels are too busy plotting a coup — disguised as "...