The Gifts of Acceptance: Embracing People And Things as They Are

by Daniel A Miller

Overview

Library Journal Starred Review and a LJ Best Wellness Book of 2018!

IBPA Benjamin Franklin Self-Help Award Winner!

IBPA Benjamin Franklin Non-Fiction Audio Book Award Winner!

Foreword Reviews Best Book of the Year Award Finalist--Family & Relationships!

What Would Your Life Be Like If You Accepted People and Things as They Are?

Do you wish your parents had been more nurturing and supportive? Are you wondering if you’ll ever find your perfect soul mate and dream boss? Do you wish you had “perfect” children, relatives who never fight, and friends who always agree with you? No one gets to sail through life free of turbulence. What separates people who shake it off, bounce back, and stay positive from the bitter, never satisfied, and defeated?

Best-selling author and former compulsive controller Daniel A. Miller convincingly attests that the answer is choosing acceptance. In the GIFTS OF ACCEPTANCE: Embracing People and Things as They Are, Danny shares what he’s learned—through extensive research, inspiring true stories, and his own experience with hardships—about the integral relationship between accepting the facts of life and others, with their quirks, flaws, and differences, and enjoying greater satisfaction in life.

Recognizing the benefits of acceptance isn’t difficult. Yet the reality of accepting an unexpected job loss or financial setbacks, a friend’s betrayal, a child’s struggle with addiction, a serious illness, or even the annoying traits of a loved one can be extremely challenging. To make it easier, THE GIFTS OF ACCEPTANCE offers insights, intentions, and strategies for practicing acceptance of parents, a significant other, children, siblings and extended family, coworkers, friends, and foes; of life’s adversities and the limitations of getting older; and, perhaps toughest of all, of yourself.

You will learn how practicing acceptance helps you

• Navigate life’s ups and downs more easily

• Enjoy greater trust, openness, and intimacy with your loved ones and those closest to you

• Survive control freaks, foes, and other crazy makers

• Lift self-imposed burdens and obligations and experience less stress, frustration, and worry

• Reduce the struggle with your children

• Strengthen bonds with coworkers and business associates

• Discover new choices and opportunities in the most discouraging situations

• Turn setbacks and failures to future successes

• Find the path to secure self-acceptance

THE GIFTS OF ACCEPTANCE is a book with the potential to repair relationships, revitalize careers, and make the world a better place.

Find out how accepting “What Is” lets you discover “What Might Be”!

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780982893050
Publisher:	Ebb and Flow Press
Publication date:	05/28/2018
Pages:	260
Product dimensions:	5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.55(d)

About the Author

Daniel A. Miller, JD, is the author of the best-selling Losing Control, Finding Serenity, a Foreword Reviews Book of the Year Award Finalist. Like most compulsive controllers, Danny was always driven to succeed. He graduated from UCLA with honors in business administration and finished in the top 5 percent of his class at the UCLA School of Law. While still in his twenties, he became a popular real estate instructor in the UCLA extension program, and in his thirties he wrote a critically acclaimed, best-selling professional book, How to Invest in Real Estate Syndicates (Dow Jones-Irwin, 1978). He later founded the California Institute of Real Estate Education, which offered state-licensed seminars to thousands of real estate professionals. Financial success came early to Danny. Celebrities and other wealthy people entrusted him with large sums to invest on their behalf. By his midthirties he could afford to live in the exclusive Old Bel Air section of Los Angeles. But for all his achievements and success, Danny had no sense of inner peace and serenity. He was imprisoned by his fears, anger, and anxieties-all bedfellows of controllers-and thus not open to the joy and wonders all around him. After suffering a series of traumatic events and financial setbacks that he could not control-no matter how hard he tried-he finally began a new life journey based on letting go of control and accepting people and things as they are. He surrendered to the ups and downs and twists and turns of life instead of resisting them and trying to control people and events. Over many years, he learned effective tools and strategies for letting go of control and accepting "what is" with his family and friends, as well as in sports, creative endeavors, and the workplace. In the process, he became an artist, a published poet, a successful businessman, a champion senior tennis player, a happily married man, and a much wiser parent-all while cutting his work time by more than half. Thus, through letting go of control and embracing life as it is, Danny found a different and more gratifying kind of success-an internal, core sense of well-being. He now writes and speaks about the profound benefits of letting go of control and practicing acceptance. His website www.danielamiller.com features over seventy of his blog posts on the control and acceptance dynamics, his poetry and paintings, and keynote speaker information.

Table of Contents

Contents

Introduction: My Path from Control

to Acceptance 1

Part I. Embracing Life as It Is

1. The Serenity of Living in Acceptance 15

2. The Gifts of Acceptance 21

3. What Acceptance Is—and Isn’t! 31

4. Letting Go of Denial 41

5. The Serenity Prayer: An Acceptance Guide 49

Part II. Accepting Others as They Are

6. Accepting Our Loved Ones 63

7. Accepting Our Children 79

8. Accepting Our Parents 101

9. Accepting Our Siblings and Family 111

10. Accepting Our Friends 121

11. Accepting Our Foes 133

12. Accepting—and Surviving—Control Freaks 147

Part III. Accepting Change and Adversity

13. Accepting Limitations and Infirmities 159

14. Accepting the Losses of Aging 173

15. Accepting Setbacks and Failure 189

A

viii | CO N T E N T S

Part IV. Accepting Ourselves

16. Truths and Paradoxes of Self-Acceptance 203

17. Discovering and Accepting Who We Are 213

Acknowledgments 225

Notes 227

Index 235

About the Author 243

Editorial Reviews

"Verdict: A solid reminder to enjoy the life we've been given. Highly Recommended." -- Library Journal Starred Review

“Danny has written a masterpiece on the art and science of acceptance, revealing the paradoxical relationship between true acceptance and transformation—the key to serenity, vitality, clarity, love, joy, and wisdom. This is truly a gift to anyone who takes the time to read the precious words within this little book.”

—Joseph Bailey, psychologist and author of The Serenity Principle, Slowing Down to the Speed of Life, and other books

"The common challenges to acceptance, from one's parents to setbacks and failure, are each profiled in chapters that use case histories and author experiences to illustrate the predicament and the contrast between controlling and accepting behavior patterns. The result is an informational title packed with strategies, tools, and tips for negotiating ups and downs with a new paradigm for living a better life."

--D. Donovan, Senior Reviewer, Midwest Book Review

“An excellent tome that explores the benefits of accepting “what is” about people, places, and things as opposed to what you would like them to be. Every chapter is aligned with specific situations and obstacles a person may face. Strategies and tools are provided to help readers overcome these different challenges….It is never too late to change being stuck permanently in the life you have now … and adopt some or all of the tools Miller provides in his book.”—Bookpleasures.com, Norm Goldman, Publisher.

“Miller’s book is absolutely key to both the understanding of acceptance and how to flourish within the confines of relationships that snag our ego. I highly recommend this book to those who find they struggle to simply ‘let people be.’”—Karen Casey, PhD, author of numerous books on recovery and women’s spirituality (www.womens-spirituality.com)

“Daniel Miller shows us how acceptance is the first step toward peace. If you dwell on what you want to change about others and feel weighed down by anger, fear, and resentment, The Gifts of Acceptance can help set you free.”—Lori Deschene, author of Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal, Tiny Buddha’s Worry Journal, and other books (tinybuddha.com)

“Danny Miller provides you with practical self-inquiries and ‘acceptance intentions,’ as well as real-life examples to help you handle every type of difficult relationship and circumstance with greater peace and serenity. You will keep reaching for The Gifts of Acceptance as one of the 12-step staples in your library.”—Nijole Sparkis, spiritual coach and host of the Heal the Shadow in Your Relationships series

From the Publisher

★ 05/01/2018
Best-selling author Miller (Losing Control; Finding Serenity) learned the hard way that his control-driven lifestyle wasn't working and that only by letting go of the reins would he find more tranquility. He didn't have to like what was going on in the world, but he had to accept life on life's terms. Miller uses Reinhold Niebuhr's Serenity Prayer as an outline for surrendering to the reality of change and adversity, other people's right to manage their own lives, and our individual gifts and limitations. Essentially, to welcome what is instead of what one hopes the world to be. VERDICT A solid reminder to enjoy the life we've been given. Highly recommended.

Library Journal