6 Classic Kids’ Books That Would Have Been Ruined by Smartphones

Millions of Cats, by Wanda Gag
This very old book—it was first published in 1928—is about a very old couple who thinks they would be happy if only they had a cat. But when the old man sets out to find a pet for himself and his wife, he doesn’t just find one cat. He finds “hundreds of cats, thousands of cats, millions and billions and trillions of cats.” The book takes a surprisingly gruesome turn when the old couple decides to let the cats duke it out to see who gets to be their kitty, and—spoiler alert—nearly all the cats end up eating each other. All of this messiness could have been avoided with a few taps on a smartphone to find one local kitty available for adoption. (Ages 2–5)

Green Eggs and Ham, by Dr. Seuss
It takes Sam-I-am almost the entire book to convince a skeptical eater to even try the titular dish in this Dr. Seuss classic. He’s convinced he doesn’t like green eggs and ham—in a box, with a fox, with a goat, or on a boat—without ever even having taken a bite. Of course, with a smartphone, the finicky eater could have quickly looked up reviews for green eggs and ham—five stars, 482 reviews—and realized it was a no-brainer right away. (Ages 3–7)

Harold and the Purple Crayon, by Crockett Johnson
Harold decides to go for a walk one evening, taking with him his oversized purple crayon. He draws himself various landscapes and companions, but then he gets lost and is unable to find his way back to his own room. Of course, if he’d brought his smartphone with him instead of a crayon, he could have just GPS’d his way home rather than asking some crazy-looking police officer who pointed the way Harold was going anyway. But, of course, then we would have missed out on most of his adventure. (Ages 4–7)

The Baby-Sitters Club series, by Ann M. Martin
A smartphone would have sucked most of the greatness out of Kristy’s great idea to start a club where parents could call one number and reach a bunch of sitters at once. First off, there’s the issue of the phone—the BSC met each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday in Claudia’s room because she was the only member who had her own phone (a landline, which most kids probably don’t even recognize today) and phone number. Now they could all just be on the same group text or have a website or even an app where parents could request a sitter anytime. And we don’t have the heart to tell Mary Anne that her carefully curated pen-and-paper calendar with her super-neat handwriting is now totally obsolete. (Ages 8–12)

Goosebumps series, by R.L. Stine
So many of the horror stories from the Classic Goosebumps series would have been totally ruined with a smartphone—the ability to call for help, check caller ID, or take a video of some supernatural/creepy occurrence going down. Among the books that would have been particularly botched is Say Cheese and Die! in which some kids find a weird camera in an abandoned house. Bad things keep happening with each photograph they take—like a pic of one of the kid’s dad’s new car develops into a photo of a crashed car, and then the kid’s dad actually gets into a real car accident. With a smartphone, the kids likely would have just snapped a pic of the weird camera, added a bunch of filters, and posted it on Instagram. (Ages 8–12)

Hatchet, by Gary Paulsen
Paulsen’s 1987 Newberry-winning book is all about a 13-year-old boy who has to survive in the wilderness with the aid of his hatchet and little else after the crash-landing of his plane, whose pilot suffered a fatal heart attack. A smartphone would have enabled him to call for help—if he had a signal, that is. And if he didn’t, then he could have at least played Plants vs. Zombies or caught up on his podcasts to pass the time till help arrived. (Ages 10–14)
What kids’ books do you think would have been ruined by a smartphone?